The Second Pint
or His… ahem… HERstory bites and draws blood
by D (a.k.a. Bacchae Bunny)
The man built the fire up well, knowing it would need to last him several candlemarks once he started the ritual. He checked the tattered parchment in his hands carefully one last time, nodding in satisfaction as he identified each object lying in a circle around the fire.
Finally, convinced that he had everything he needed, the shaman pulled the buckskin from his body and stepped into the nearby creek for a ritual cleansing. He dipped a finger in the paints he had prepared and gently drew the symbols of the war god on his chest. Stripes on his face, arms and thighs completed the look and he put on a clean breechcloth and began his chanting.
Darkness fell as the ritual continued, bringing with it a rumble of thunder and fierce lightning. The shaman’s chanting grew louder and each object around the small circle he danced in began to emit an eerie light. Then without warning, the glow disappeared, the shaman was thrown from the circle and somewhere not too far distant, a bolt of lightning struck, leaving behind a mark… and something that would change everything for some and something for everyone.
Gabrielle felt the rending of her soul as the sun set and Xena slipped away from her. Breathing became problematic as the pain overwhelmed her and she forced herself to focus on each breath she took. So intent was she on maintaining a semblance of control that she didn’t detect his presence until the small black pot was snatched from her grasp and its contents were floating in the Fountain of Strength.
Gabrielle sat stunned for long seconds… long enough for Ares to mumble something incomprehensible to her. The war god looked up expectantly, frowning when he realized that this wasn’t going strictly according to plan. And that was all he had time to understand because he suddenly found himself with an armful of heartbroken, furious bard.
“ARES!!” Gabrielle screamed as she started pummeling him with her fists. “What in Tartarus are you doing??? That was all I had left of her! Damn you, Ares! Damn you!!” He grabbed at her flailing arms.
“It should have worked,” he muttered loud enough for her to hear. “It should have brought her back.” Those words simply sparked her ire again and she pushed him away from her, swinging wildly. He was so taken aback by her aggressiveness that Gabrielle actually managed to land a shot or two before Ares grabbed her wrists in one large hand and held on tightly. Only then could he make out her forlorn whisper.
“She chose to leave me. She chose to give up our life together for a lie. And you’ve taken all I had left of her.” He didn’t see her draw back her arm, but the impact of her fist on his face was… magnificent. And quite painful, surprisingly. Frighteningly, it reminded of the time he had spent as a mortal and he was not at all anxious to relive that particular experience ever again.
“Look blondie, I only thought to do us both a favor, but I can see you’d never be able to appreciate it. It’s a long trip back to Greece. Maybe you’ll be able to show a little respect by the time you get home and we can talk about this rationally. Until then, see ya.”
He disappeared in a glow of blue light and Gabrielle took a last swing at the air where he had been standing. “ARES!!” she screamed again, but he was gone. She dropped to the ground until her hand fell on the small pot. Then she scrambled to her feet and began to feverishly scoop the ashes from the pool of water.
“As angry as I am with you right now, Xena, you have to know I never meant for something like this to happen. I promised to take you home and I meant that. I’ve tried not to make promises to you I didn’t intend to keep. Too bad you can’t say the same.” She was quiet then for a few minutes as she concentrated on gathering every single bit of ash she could collect from the fountain with only the light of the full moon to guide her efforts.
When she was satisfied she had done the very best she could, she straightened with a groan and lidded the pot. She looked around for her gear and, with a sigh, she wrapped the pot closed carefully so none of the ashes would spill and placed Xena’s remains in the bottom of her bag. Then she began her descent off the mountain in the darkness.
Gabrielle didn’t go very far. She mostly wanted to get away from the spot where she’d lost Xena. Even the thought of that hurt and she focused on controlling her breathing, absently thankful for the time they’d spent together meditating. She noted a small outcropping and made her way over to it, setting her bag down and shaking out her blanket before lying down and closing her eyes. Sheer physical exhaustion took over and she went to sleep with Ares voice haunting her dreams… It should have brought her back.
A lone tear escaped her closed lid, even as she slept on.
With daylight, Gabrielle arose and took up her burdens once more. She slowly and steadily made her way down Mt. Fuji, until she reached Higuchi. It was just lunchtime when she arrived and she was approached by a merchant who bowed to her before offering her a bowl of rice. She tried politely to decline, then realized her refusal would offend the man and accepted his gift with a nod when he rebuffed her payment.
She slowly became aware that everyone in the village was bowing as she passed, regarding her with a mixture of fear, awe and sympathy. It made her want to break down into tears. Instead, she bit her lip and searched out Hoketsu.
He did not speak, but took her to the bathing room, sensing she was not ready to talk about what had happened on the mountain. The fact that she was alone spoke volumes more than words ever could. He waited til she nodded her approval of the arrangements, then bowed his way out the door. Gabrielle stripped and slid into the warm pool, allowing the tears to flow at last.
Meanwhile, at the docks, word had passed about the incredible defeat the small blonde warrior had visited on Yodoshi and the inconceivable price she had paid for her victory. The Captain of one of the vessels in residence stepped onto the dock and began looking for Hoketsu. The younger man bowed as the short, gray-haired captain approached him. Hoketsu had the utmost respect for Katerina von Lihp, even though the woman had the strangest habit of dressing like a shepherd instead of the Germanic sea captain she was. Still, she had proven herself a friend to Hoketsu and the people of Higuchi, so they overlooked her idiosyncrasies.
“Captain Lihp, it is a pleasure. How may the people of Higuchi serve you?”
“Ah, Hoketsu, my friend. Is it true that Yodoshi has been defeated by a small woman warrior?”
“Yes, yes, but at great cost to herself… to her soul.”
The older woman scratched her face. “Perhaps I will offer her a way home. I’m sure she will not want to stay here.”
“She is bathing, but I will bring her to you if she is willing, when she is done.”
“Excellent. I will see to preparing the boat. The tide goes out at sunset and we would do well to go with it.”
With a nod, Hoketsu continued on to the small market area and Captain Lihp returned to her vessel.
When he reached the shop he was looking for, Hoketsu entered and bowed toward the proprietor. The older man bowed back then asked with a smile. “Hoketsu, what can I do for you?”
“Morimoto, do you have anything to fit the Little Dragon Warrior? Her clothing was destroyed in the battle with Yodoshi. I wish to replace it before she leaves us.”
“She is leaving then?”
“I expect she will. There is no real reason for her to remain and Captain Lihp is going to offer her passage back toward Greece. I think she will accept it.”
Morimoto nodded his head thoughtfully. “I believe I can find something for her. She is much the size of the women here. Let me look. She will have my very best.”
Hoketsu nodded and Morimoto went into the back area of his shop. Within minutes he returned and held up a package. “Several moons ago, I was compelled to make this,” he said quietly, “though I didn’t understand why at the time. Now I do. My gift to her.”
Hoketsu nodded and accepted the package without opening it. Morimoto was the finest tailor he knew, so he believed that Gabrielle would appreciate the beauty of whatever artistry he had created.
As he began to make his way back to the bath house, Hoketsu was stopped by nearly every citizen of Higuchi, all eager to share their thanks with the bard. He was forced to ask for help in carrying all the gifts offered to her and he and Yama had to stop at his home to drop things off first. Then he turned to the young woman.
“Yama, will you take this to Gabrielle? She needs new clothing, but I do not wish to intrude upon the peace of her bath.”
“I would be honored, Hoketsu.” She bowed and walked the short distance to the bath house. When she arrived at the door, she stopped and listened. When she didn’t hear anything, she knocked timidly and waited for permission to enter.
Gabrielle raised her head and opened her eyes to glare at the door when the knock came. She sighed soundlessly and beckoned, “Come.”
Yama stepped into the warm room at the whispered command. “For you, Little Dragon.” Yama set the package on the small bench that held the ragged remains of her Samurai costume and her meager belongings. The long sword, katana and chakram stood out conspicuously. “Morimoto sent it for you.”
Gabrielle wanted to refuse, but she was too tired and too heart sore to really care. Instead, she nodded and closed her eyes again. Yama smiled gently and bowed herself out, closing her eyes at the anguish she had seen in the bard’s own.
Gabrielle sat in the tub a bit longer before finally taking the cloth and the cake of soap and scrubbing herself clean, wishing with all her heart she could do the same with the memories. When she was done, she rose from the water and covered herself with the towel, walking over to inspect the package wrapped in rice paper.
She untied the hemp knot and the paper fell away to reveal… it was another samurai outfit, but this one was done in an indigo that reminded her of…. Her breath caught and she closed her eyes against the pain. Gabrielle slipped into the trousers, belting them comfortably before picking up the tunic. She stared amazed at the dragon pattern on the back, an exact duplicate of the one she now bore. It was silver and gold, red and green and she absently marveled at the intricate detail involved in its creation before donning it and settling her weapons.
She folded the towel neatly and stepped into her sandals before she exited the bath house and headed for the docks.
Hoketsu saw Gabrielle leave and moved to walk with her. She glanced in his direction and gave him a quizzical look, but did not say anything.
“I have arranged a way for you back to the mainland, if you desire to return. I did not think you would want to remain here any longer than necessary.” Gabrielle nodded her acceptance of his words and motioned for him to lead the way.
When they reached Captain Lihp’s boat, Hoketsu crossed the gangway and beckoned Gabrielle to join him on the deck. She walked over with cat-like ease, landing on the teak planking with a little hop. The Captain moved away from her first mate and came over to greet them.
“Welcome aboard. Hoketsu indicated you would like passage out of Japa. I would be happy to take you anywhere you would like to go.” Gabrielle looked around at the spic-and-span ship and at the not-so-motley crew and nodded. “Are you in a hurry to get back to Greece or would you like to go with us? I have several ports of call I can stop at if you’re not in a rush.”
Gabrielle nodded again and both the Captain and Hoketsu began to wonder if her voice had been stolen on the mountain top. However, Lihp was nothing if not a determined woman, so she continued. “Excellent. Shanghai will be our first stop then.” She didn’t see the speculative gleam that entered the dull green eyes. “Now come,” she persisted. “Let me show you your cabin.”
Gabrielle turned to Hoketsu and hugged him. He hugged back gently, knowing that beneath the solidness of her body lay a fragility that was close to shattering. “Thank you,” he whispered before she released him and stepped back to follow the Captain below decks. He waited a moment longer, then turned and stepped back down the gangplank to the docks. When his feet touched solid ground again, Hoketsu turned and looked back at the ship a final time, offering a prayer to his gods for the safety of Gabrielle’s soul.
Lihp went down a single set of stairs and stopped in front of one of the few doors in the passageway. Then she turned to Gabrielle with serious intent.
“We don’t carry many passengers, so your berth is not large. We do carry them often enough that this space is set aside for that purpose and it is clean. That is about the most that can be said for it. You have the freedom of the ship and if you need anything, you have but to ask.”
Gabrielle nodded her understanding and the Captain opened the door, stepping back so she could pass thru. She looked around. Katerina hadn’t lied – the space was extremely small, but it was clean and would suit her needs. Gabrielle gave her a simple nod of approval.
“Excellent! The good people of Higuchi wanted to be sure you were provided for on your journey, so they left you some provisions. Most of the things are here in your cabin. The rest is below decks in the storage area until you are ready to leave us.” She waited for a response, but when none was forthcoming, she sighed silently and continued. “Now if you will excuse me, we will get underway.”
Gabrielle nodded again and turned her back in dismissal, stepping over to open the small porthole to allow the fresh air in. She heard the door closed and the Captain’s footsteps grow fainter before her shoulders sagged and she slumped onto the small platform cot.
No one heard her silent tears.
The next three weeks passed without much change in routine for either the ship’s crew or its passenger. Gabrielle had not spoken a word since she’d set foot on the ship and the crew had learned rather quickly to steer clear of her. She spent candlemarks every day working with both the katana and her sais, though the chakram never left her hip. Her body grew lean and hard even as her eyes became more lifeless and dull.
The remainder of her waking candlemarks, Gabrielle spent staring out to sea or meditating. The longer the voyage became, the more often she turned to meditation. She found it soothed what was threatening to become an overwhelming rage. Her urge to strike out at everyone and everything sometimes sent a red wash through her veins. She found that meditating kept it manageable.
Strangely, the meditating and practice did wonders for her seasickness as well. Though she was not particularly happy to be on a ship again and despite the fact that her appetite was minimal, she experienced only mild discomfort this trip compared to previous ones.
Finally, on the morning of the twenty-second day, the lookout called out, “Land ho!” and it wasn’t long before the boat was in the shipping lanes pulling in to the Shanghai port. Gabrielle went below decks to pack her few belongings. Except for the samurai clothing and some fresh fruit that she’d shared among the crew, she had touched nothing from Higuchi. She felt the boat slip into a berth and gave an unconscious sigh of relief.
As she made her way topside, she was hailed by the Captain. “Little Dragon, wait. Please.”
Gabrielle stopped, digging into her bag. She found what she was looking for and handed Katerina her small purse. Lihp recoiled as though it were a snake.
“NO!” she said vehemently. “Your money will not work with us, Little Dragon. The people of Higuchi owed you a debt and this is how they chose to make payment.”
Green eyes studied hers and Katerina fought to contain her shudder at the deadness of them. Eventually Gabrielle nodded her agreement and placed the purse back in her bag. The Captain nodded back and exhaled in relief.
“Good! Good! Now what shall we do with your other things, hä?” Gabrielle’s brow crinkled in confusion and Katerina hastened to explain. “The gifts we stowed in the hold.”
Gabrielle shook her head and shrugged. Then she reached out and clasped Katerina’s arm briefly before turning and heading down the gangplank.
Captain Lihp watched her out of sight before muttering to herself. “The gods watch over you, Gabrielle of Poteideia. We will see you in Greece.” Then she turned back to her boat and the business at hand.
Shanghai was a busy port of call, full of merchants, sailors and purveyors of all types of things. Gabrielle took notice of little of it, not realizing that people moved out of her way. She didn’t notice the whispers as her samurai dress was noted by the populace. Her senses were aware, but they were focused for danger, not for whispered comments and the space of respect.
She stepped off the main path, looking for a quiet inn with a bath. The first thing that actually got her attention was the sweet smell of opium and she hesitated in front of the door for a long moment. Gabrielle remembered well Xena’s stories from her first experience in Chin, though she’d never shared much from that part of her life. Xena had shared the reason for her reluctance to use any sort of narcotic to dull her pain.
Now Gabrielle found herself seriously contemplating the need to lose herself as she had lost Xena. To fill the void Xena’s death had caused with mellow joy, even if only for a little while. She put her hand on the door and pushed it open slightly, allowing the wafting sweet scent of the opium to escape. Then she let is close as her shoulders dropped and she turned to journey farther up the road.
“No. I will keep the memories and the pain. It’s all I have left.”
Gabrielle found what she was looking for on the outskirts of the town. The Labrys hanging near the door reminded her of the Amazons and she knew that she would be safe for the night. It occurred to her in passing that she would need to check on her sisters if she lived that long. She would make it back to Greece… she had promised Xena long ago to take her back to her brother. But Gabrielle had no definite plans beyond getting Xena’s remains to Amphipolis. After that….
With a sigh, she pushed open the door, welcoming the relative quiet after the marketplace. She stepped to the bar and dug in her purse, withdrawing a gold coin. She slapped in on the bar in front of the proprietress and raised a brow. She gave silent thanks for Xena’s training when the woman started speaking rapid-fire Chinese.
“For that… dinner, bath, bed, breakfast and supplies for the road.” Gabrielle nodded agreement and took the mug of ale placed before her. “Everyone calls me Ling,” the woman introduced herself. “Come and I will show you to your room.”
Gabrielle hefted her bag and lifted the mug. Then she followed Ling down the small hallway. She opened a door and Gabrielle noted it was a clean, sparse room. She nodded her satisfaction and set down her things. Ling crossed the hall and opened another door. Inside was a huge pool, much like the one Gabrielle had used in Higuchi. Except this one had other women in it. They all turned to look and Gabrielle bore the stares stoically.
Ling turned to her and asked, “You want to bathe now? I will wash the outfit, samurai… no extra charge.”
Gabrielle stepped into the room and stripped out of her clothing, this time acutely aware of the whispers behind her. A collective gasp fell from the lips of those gathered when her bare back was exposed. When she turned around, she noted that all the women had moved to the far end of the pool. Shrugging to herself, she moved towards the pool.
Ling handed her a cloth and a towel. “They moved to show respect, Little Dragon. Women warriors are very rare here and samurai not at all.” She offered a cake of soap.
Gabrielle’s eyes had widened at Ling’s use of her nickname, but she took the soap and began bathing the days at sea away from her body. When she was done, she rose and wrapped the towel around herself and left the room. Not a word had been spoken while she’d been in there and the low murmur of voices now sounded like so many angry bees.
Dinner was rice and vegetables and a flagon of wine that Gabrielle found sitting on the low table when she stepped into her room. She ate, pleasantly surprised by the mixture of flavors. Then she fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.
It was late when she awakened and only then because Ling was knocking. Gabrielle pulled the sheet around her and wiped the sleep from her eyes as she rose. She scrubbed her hand through her hair and then opened the door.
Ling offered her a tray and a package. Gabrielle could tell from the feel it was her clothing and she bowed slightly in thanks. Then she shut the door and began to prepare herself for travel.
Ling had given her a small map and Gabrielle had decided to follow the Yangtze River while she searched for Eve. She knew it could take a while for her to find Eve, but figured when she started hearing Eli’s message, the messenger would not be too far away.
It was shortly after midday when Gabrielle was stopped by a small group of men demanding payment for walking along the road. The Gabrielle of old, being a skilled bard and negotiator, would have tried talking her way out of the situation. The new Gabrielle didn’t hesitate and in the blink of an eye held her katana in one hand and the chakram in the other.
The men laughed amazed at the boldness of the woman standing before them. Not knowing she understood them perfectly and not just the crude gestures they had demanded payment with, one man commented to the other just what he was going to do to teach the impudent woman a lesson.
His words weren’t out of his mouth before his head hit the ground. His body remained upright a beat or two longer before it collapsed. In the silence that followed, the five remaining men gauged the situation and the lone woman warrior. Deciding she could not beat them as a whole, they attacked enthusiastically, trying to bury her under the onslaught.
Gabrielle shifted the katana forward and across, glorying in the sweet, coppery smell of blood as it sprayed over her mostly bare skin and licking it’s tangy saltiness from her lips. She had resumed her red velvet number when she’d left the inn and now she was glad she had… for several different reasons.
With her left hand she swung the chakram in a wide arc, catching the third man across the throat. He gurgled his last breath.
The three remaining men looked at Gabrielle as though she were a demon possessed and tried to back away. Gabrielle felt the bloodlust sing through her veins and grinned. “Problem, boys? One woman a little too much for you?” said in a whisper that sent skitters across their collective spines.
They didn’t understand her words, but her intent was clear. Before they could decide between fight or flight, Gabrielle descended upon them, unleashing the pain and fury she felt. It didn’t take long and in the end, six Chinamen laid dead and the blood-covered warrior wiped her weapons before continuing her journey.
When evening came, Gabrielle found herself searching for a place to make camp. She’d encountered two other sets of highwaymen and each encounter ended the same. She wanted to feel sadness for the unnecessary deaths, but all she could manage was a sense of fulfillment. Strangely, she wasn’t particularly hungry, though she’d missed lunch.
Shrugging her shoulders, she found a quiet spot off the beaten path near a still pool. She checked the water and when she was satisfied it wasn’t stagnant, she stripped her clothes off and stepped in to wash.
It took her a few minutes to wash the blood away, but she did so rather nonchalantly, then took up her red velvet outfit and scrubbed it clean. She rose from the water and shivered a little in the light breeze. She took a shift from her bag and slid into it, then laid her clothing on the nearby brush to dry. Gabrielle started a small fire, appreciating the warmth more than the light. She heated water for tea and wrapped herself in her sleeping furs, never even realizing when she passed from wakefulness into sleep.
The next few days started a pattern that would continue for the next few moons. Gabrielle rose early and ate, then moved on down the river path. Some days, she would encounter brigands and she found herself oddly full after decimating each roving band. Other days she would spend in the small towns or villages she ran across, helping where she could… building a barn, taking care of the sick, cleaning up after a raid. Simple things that reminded her she was still alive and there were always people in need of help.
Slowly, the days passed into weeks and the weeks became one moon and then two. Finally, after nearly three moons of travel across the land of Chin, Gabrielle was certain Eve was not in the country. She had reached the mountains with no hint of the message or the messenger.
Studying the map, Gabrielle realized that India was on the other side of the mountain range and she decided she was tired of Chin. So she prepared herself and her gear for a trip over the mountains and into India.
It was an arduous journey, but Gabrielle welcomed the challenge. It took all her focus and that was especially good when her bloodlust returned in full measure. She hardly had time to wonder at the cause of it, much less its satisfaction. Soon, the cold and lust overwhelmed her and when she stepped into a world that seemed to be a figment of her madness, she surrendered to it.
When she first opened her eyes, Gabrielle was almost sure she’d crossed into the Elysian Fields. Instead of the cold, whipping wind and stinging bite of snow she expected, the temperature was mild and the climate moderate. Blinking, she realized that she was indoors on a soft bed. She sat up and noticed for the first time that she was clean and naked. It didn’t really concern her, but it did make her curious, so Gabrielle gathered the sheet around her and padded to the window. She opened it and stared out into… green eyes blinked several times. The grass was lush and green and the flowers bursting with fragrance and color. Well-dressed people walked along a market area filled with all manner of interesting things.
Gabrielle’s forehead crinkled in confusion. She didn’t recall the Fields having a marketplace. A knock on her door interrupted her contemplation.
A curly head poked in after the second knock and for a moment Gabrielle thought it was Ephiny. She shook her head trying to clear the confusion while motioning for the woman to come in.
“Hello, young one,” the cheerful voice greeted. “Welcome to Shangri La.”
Gabrielle’s brow furrowed again. The name seemed so familiar, but she couldn’t place it. Was it a myth she had heard? A story on the road? She shrugged mentally. It would occur to her eventually. It usually did. Gabrielle turned her attention back to the woman.
“… Manassa, so you let me know if I can help you, all right dear?” Without waiting for an answer, Manassa continued. “Here is your clothing. It’s been cleaned and repaired.” Gabrielle reached for her purse. “Oh, no charge, dear. We can settle your bill later. Are you hungry?”
Gabrielle thought about that, then nodded.
“Good, I’ll let you get dressed, then we’ll see about feeding you.” The woman was gone before Gabrielle had a chance to register her leaving.
The next few days passed in something of a blur for Gabrielle. The people had made her very welcome, expecting nothing more from her than what she offered. There was a lassitude, a peace that pervaded all life here and Gabrielle found a part of herself wishing she could stay and enjoy it. The larger part of her was growing antsier, trying to control an urge she still didn’t understand.
On the morning of the ninth day after her arrival in the small village, Gabrielle packed up her kit. She knew she had to leave before the burning in her blood manifest itself physically. Manassa looked at her with great sadness.
“I hope you find your peace, young warrior,” she said softly as she accepted a small amount of money from Gabrielle. They’d argued about this… Gabrielle with silent, harsh motions and Manassa with quiet, simple words. They had reached an accord they could both live with and now Gabrielle was anxious to leave the small village before she visited her rage upon the innocent people living there.
Gabrielle nodded an acknowledgement of her words and unexpectedly leaned forward to brush her lips on Manassa’s cheek. Then she stepped out the door without a backward look and headed for the Southern mountain range and India that lay beyond.
Once again, the severe cold overcame every thought and focus she had and Gabrielle’s last thought before she succumbed was that she would never get to tell Eve about Xena’s death.
When she awakened this time, it was to the familiar scent of curry and a firm straw mattress beneath her body. She sat up and looked around, hoping to find a clue of where she was, wondering if her previous experience had been the imaginings of a madwoman.
Her stirrings alerted the young man who was tending to her and he nodded to the young woman who was in the room with him before handing her a cup and bidding her to drink. Then he spoke softly in Hindu words Gabrielle recognized from her travels twenty-six full cycles previously.
“Rest, Dragon Warrior. The messenger has been summoned.”
Gabrielle relaxed, hoping that the hard part of her journey was almost done. She’d fallen into a light doze and didn’t rouse when Eve stepped into the room. Tears filled Eve’s eyes, noting the pallor and almost skeletal leanness, knowing that Gabrielle’s solitary state could only mean one thing. Eve nodded her thanks to the young man and he took it for the dismissal it was. Then Eve settled into a chair by Gabrielle’s bedside and waited for her to awaken again.
Slowly, slower than she expected, Gabrielle felt herself rising toward the light again and was at once eager and fearful to awaken. She was fairly certain that Eve was the person in the room with her and now that she actually had to tell her about her mother, Gabrielle felt the tears that had been dry for three moons begin to flow.
Eve sensed Gabrielle’s distress and moved to kneel by the bed. She didn’t speak, but merely held the hand of someone who could have been another mother to her if Fate had treated them all just a little differently. She wondered if Gabrielle would consider her a friend.
Things had always been slightly strained and awkward between them though they had tried to work through it due to their love for Xena. Now it was that love that would pull them together or push them apart forever.
Gabrielle felt Eve take her hand and the gentle kindness in the gesture made the tears flow even faster. She curled into herself and Eve’s eyes welled with sympathetic tears. Without thought, she scooped the small woman into her arms and held her tightly until Gabrielle had stopped trembling.
Eve kissed the blonde hair lightly before setting Gabrielle next to her and taking the calloused hands in her own smoother ones. She recognized the weapons patterns and closed her eyes. Only one thing would have prompted her to choose a sword, after all this time, Eve thought seriously.
“Gabrielle,” she said softly, not understanding the flinch that passed through the other woman’s body at the sound of her name. Gabrielle’s eyes closed as she tried to regain her equilibrium. “Gabrielle, I know you came here to tell me Mother is dead… didn’t you? It’s the only reason I can think of you would be here alone.”
Gabrielle nodded her head, for a long moment unable to look into the blue eyes that reminded her of just how much she’d lost.
“Can you tell me what happened?” Eve paused, reading the agony so clearly in the dead green eyes that finally met her own. “I know… I know you loved her, Gabrielle, more than anything, just as she loved you.” Gabrielle’s shudder was visible, but Eve continued. “If things had been different, we would have been a family. I loved her, because she was my mother and I knew she loved me in return. And I’ll miss her, but more for what could have been than what was.”
Gabrielle understood what Eve was saying. It was almost what she’d expected, given the limited amount of time mother and daughter had had together before Eve had journeyed eastward. They had bonded and even become friends, but her grief was not the overwhelming loss of a soulmate that Gabrielle was living with.
Gabrielle was quiet for so long that Eve felt compelled to speak. “Gabrielle, I can’t begin to understand how you feel, but I am here if you need to talk. For now, though, I’d like you to drink this and get some rest.” She handed a cup to Gabrielle. “We can continue our discussion later.”
Gabrielle complied without protest and it was then that it occurred to Eve what was so odd… beyond the obvious. Gabrielle had yet to say a word.
Eve waited patiently while Gabrielle finished the draught the healer had left for her, then sat beside her until she felt the small warrior slip into a deep sleep. Then she rose and went to her own room, closing the door before calling on Gabrielle’s goddess friend.
“Aphrodite, goddess of love and friend to my mother and Gabrielle, I beseech you to grant me an audience.”
“Yo, babe! Whassup?”
Eve turned from the window and looked at the goddess now standing in a ring of rose petals in her barely-there pink outfit. Dite grinned and shook her curly mane.
“Hey, Eve! Long time, no talk to. You still doing the one God gig?”
“Hi, Aphrodite! Yeah, I am, so thanks for coming.”
“Too bad!” The goddess flopped on Eve’s bed, frowning in supreme discomfort. “Ew! Grody!” She snapped her fingers and was instantly on her own comfortable divan. “Ah, much better,” she sighed. “Now what’s up that you call for me instead of Eli?” her tone serious.
“I asked you to come because of Gabrielle. She once told me that you were her friend.”
Now Eve had Dite’s full attention. “I’d like to think I still am.”
Eve took a seat on the couch beside the goddess and looked directly into her eyes. “Good. Then you can tell me what happened to my mother and why Gabrielle no longer speaks.”
Aphrodite’s eyes grew wide. “Whaddya mean what happened to….” Her voice trailed off and her gaze went inward. “That would explain Ares….” she muttered to herself, then reached for Eve’s hand. “C’mon, babe. We’ve got things to do.”
“Uh… but… Aphr….” But that was all she got out as the pair disappeared in a shimmer of sparkles.
Her last visit to Olympus had been such an unmitigated disaster, Eve wasn’t real comfortable when she figured out where they were. Aphrodite caught that clue pretty quick.
“Chill, babe.” There was sadness in her gaze before she focused on Eve. “We aren’t going to the audience hall. None of us have been there since….”
Eve laid a gentle hand on Dite’s arm and looked at her compassionately. “Aphrodite, I am sorry. What happened….”
“What happened to them was totally their fault. Ares and I tried to warn them… tried to stop them, but they so wouldn’t listen. They paid for their arrogance to the max. Maybe one day they’ll get it.” Eve looked at her in confusion, but Dite continued. “This is my scrying bowl,” motioning towards the object. “We can see what rocked her world for ourselves.” She looked at Eve. “Do you know when this happened?”
Eve shook her head. “No, but it has to have been a couple moons or so. She is nothing but muscle and bone. And her hands are rough as though she’s been fighting for a while.”
“Well, it for sure didn’t happen around here or I would have seen it. Let me hook this gnarly thing to the worldwide god web. This will let us scan for her anywhere, anytime.”
Dite did some adjusting and jiggling, looking back and forth between the back of the scrying bowl and the wall where the picture was being reflected. “Eve, keep an eye on the picture will you, babe? I don’t have to do this often and I never remember….” The love goddess ducked her around the back, mumbling to herself.
“Hold it!” Eve shouted, causing Aphrodite to smack into the wall. She lifted up her head to glare at Eve. “Sorry, but that is perfect.”
Dite eased away from the bowl, rubbing her head gingerly as she moved to take a seat on the large bed. She waved a hand and a tray appeared and she poured them each a goblet of wine. “Now, how far back do you think we should go?”
“Um, Aphrodite, shouldn’t we start at the here and now first?”
“Oh, like duh!” She looked around, then snatched the small box of the bedside stand. She pointed it at the scrying bowl, but nothing happened. Dite peered at it closely, then aimed again. “This is so uncool! Never let a man play with the toys, babe, especially a god. They never work right after that.” She rapped it against her hand, pleased when the picture shifted to Gabrielle, then appalled when she saw exactly what shape her friend was in. “Oh, my… Gabrielle?”
Tears flooded Aphrodite’s eyes and she raised a hand to cover her mouth. “Oh Gabrielle,” she said softly. “Let’s see what we can do.” She looked at Eve, “Two moons, you said?”
Eve nodded. “At least, I think. What happened to her takes time.”
“All right, that would make it….” She pointed the box and Eve watched a blur of images fly by in reverse. The images stopped. “… about here.” Dite clicked the box but nothing happened. She clicked it twice more, but still nothing. Frustrated she gave it a good smack and the images stared to play forward in slow motion.
“Um, Aphrodite, I don’t wanna question your methods, but why not just wave or snap or something? Wouldn’t it be easier?”
“Yes, but the instructions to using the wwgw say to use the box, so I do.” She shook it and the picture resumed normal speed. Then she almost wished it hadn’t. Gabrielle was surrounded by highwaymen and yet she cut them down as callously as though they had been so much brush wood. Dite cleared her throat. “Maybe we should look for her and Xena together.”
The images once more moved backwards rapidly and Dite missed the final interlude on Mt. Fuji. Instead, she caught them at the teahouse, just as Xena was teaching Gabrielle the pinch.
“Stop,” Eve said quietly. “This is important.”
So they watched, experiencing Gabrielle’s horror first hand. When they got to Xena’s headless body, Eve whispered, “No more, please,” and stunned, Dite complied. She shut off the scrying bowl and the worldwide god web marked her place, a factor which would become crucial as time went on.
Eve had tears streaming down her face when she looked at Aphrodite. “My God… how horrible. No wonder Gabrielle was nearly destroyed by this. I barely knew my mother and I feel like my guts are being ripped out. They were everything to each other.”
“That was way uncool of Xena,” Aphrodite commented flippantly, wiping the tears from her eyes. “There is gonna be some radical payment for this screw-up,” she muttered. “Let’s get back to Gabrielle. I have something that may help until I can find a solution to this totally fubared situation.” They disappeared, leaving only a trail of rose petals in their wake.
Gabrielle woke to the soft feel of fingers gently combing through her hair and for a long moment lost herself in memories the feeling stirred in her. Then she realized that the touch was wrong and reality crashed on top of her once more. She opened her eyes and saw tears in the blue eyes regarding her.
“How ya doing, kiddo?” Aphrodite asked softly. She stopped stroking as Gabrielle sat up, but kept her hand on the muscular arm. It took all she had not to flinch at the obvious changes Xena’s death had wrought in her friend. “I’m sorry, Gabrielle. I just found out, or I’d have been here sooner.”
Gabrielle didn’t answer and she didn’t cry, but she did throw her arms around the goddess’s neck and hug her for all she was worth. Dite spared a moment’s thought to be thankful for her immortality… the strength of the hug would have been painful otherwise.
Gabrielle clung to her for quite some time and neither woman noticed when Eve slipped out the door to give them some privacy. Finally, they separated and Aphrodite put two fingers under Gabrielle’s chin, raising the green eyes to meet her own. This time she did flinch and closed her eyes briefly when the depth of Gabrielle’s pain met her gaze.
“I have a totally radical present for ya,” the goddess said lightly, but Gabrielle could feel the effort Dite was putting in to maintain her facade. She reached up a trembling hand to Dite’s face and smiled forlornly. Two tears spilled from Aphrodite’s eyes and fell unnoticed to the bed. The goddess reached out her hand and a ring appeared in it. She presented it to Gabrielle.
“I’ve seen a little of what brought you here. I’d like you to wear this. It’s my talisman… it will mark you as my chosen and offer you protection as you travel.” She watched Gabrielle’s face closely and Gabrielle slowly took the ring from her fingers. She looked a question at Dite and the goddess answered. “You never needed it before now.”
Gabrielle shook her head and tried to hand it back. Aphrodite’s hands folded Gabrielle’s closed over the ring. “Please. You have to let me help. This is wrong and I need time to find the answers!”
The bard had never seen Dite so adamant or so distraught. She gazed into the goddess’s eyes for a very long time before finding the answer she was seeking. Then she nodded her acquiescence.
Aphrodite smiled. “Thank you, girlfriend. Now, would you like a radical lift back to Greece or…?”
She broke off and it took Gabrielle a moment shift gears and realize the Dite had reverted to form to deal with things on a less serious level. She more than most understood Aphrodite hid the depth of her feelings and intelligence behind the airhead blonde mentality. Gabrielle shook her head and Aphrodite nodded in understanding.
“Cool! I’ve got some research to do, so you chill with Eve or whatever and I’ll see you in Greece shortly, k?”
Gabrielle just nodded again, almost sure she’d understood what Dite had said. Time would tell.
“Keep the ring on babe! See ya!” And the goddess disappeared in a shower of petals.
Gabrielle picked one up and rubbed it between her fingers, shaking her head with a smile. She slid the ring onto her middle finger, then shifted, scowling when something hard pressed into the soft flesh of her leg. A knock on her door made her look up and then she returned her attention to the cot, searching around with her hands to find what was poking her.
Her hands hit the objects just as the door opened and she closed her fist around them and glanced up at Eve who’s stuck her head in hesitantly. They stared at each other a long time before Eve broke the tableau and walked over to Gabrielle’s side. She didn’t take a seat on the bed, but rather knelt on the floor at Gabrielle’s feet.
She studied the hands in her lap, then gazed into Gabrielle’s eyes. “I know what happened,” she said softly. “Some of it anyway. But I’d like to hear the whole story from you. Do you think you could…?”
Gabrielle studied her, clenching her fists in memory before looking down and opening them, realizing what had been aggravating her. Aphrodite’s tears, she mused, staring at the two large diamonds now resting in her palm. She looked back at Eve, whose face bore a patient, understanding countenance. She deserves to know the whole truth, Gabrielle decided. She nodded her head.
Eve sat up on her knees and brushed her lips across Gabrielle’s cheek. “Thank you. I’ll leave you to get dressed and then perhaps you’ll join me for dinner?” She waited for Gabrielle’s nod. “The bathing room is next door if you’d rather have a warm bath first.” She saw a tiny sparkle enter Gabrielle’s eyes. “I’ll come get you in half a candlemark or so then, all right?”
“Thank you, Eve.” There was no sound, but they were the first words Gabrielle’s lips had formed since just after Xena’s death. It was a tiny, tiny step, but it was a step in the right direction.
Gabrielle spent almost a full moon with Eve. It was far longer than she’d planned to stay, but she found the retelling of Xena’s story so draining that Eve would only allow her to whisper short bits of the tale before sending her off to rest and recuperate.
Gabrielle spent much of her off time with Eve meditating or drilling. She tried to keep to a schedule that wouldn’t disturb the others in the compound, but many were the nights that Eve would wake in the middle of the night to find Gabrielle in the courtyard moving her katana with deadly accuracy.
After eleven straight nights of this, Eve decided to take action. Knowing Gabrielle was sleeping little and eating less, Eve decided to go with her own strength’s and make sure that Gabrielle finally got the rest she so desperately needed.
That morning, Gabrielle had reached the part in her story where she’d found Xena’s headless body and she’d left the room abruptly with hot, angry tears coursing down her face. Eve made no immediate move to find her, reliving the awful sight that had plagued her since seeing it with Aphrodite. She could only imagine how magnified Gabrielle’s feelings were, having actually lived through the trauma.
Instead, Eve went to her chamber and sought answers through prayer and meditation. Eli manifested himself to her and for several candlemarks they talked, until Eve was prepared to take the necessary action to help Gabrielle. Eli blessed her and bade her to rest, which she did, until darkness fell. Then she took up the sword Eli had left for her and moved into the courtyard to await Gabrielle’s arrival.
Gabrielle did not disappoint. Just as the moon reached its zenith, she stepped from the shadows of her doorway and into the middle of the soft grass. The katana made the merest whisper of sound as it left its sheath and Gabrielle immediately flew into a furious frenzy of moves.
Eve watched from the shadows and waited patiently, choosing carefully the precise moment to enter the fray. Gabrielle didn’t even blink when her imaginary foe coalesced into a live human being before her eyes. She simply stepped up her intensity and a feral light entered her eyes.
Eve shuddered when she saw the familiar but forgotten expression enter Gabrielle’s eyes and she knew then that this battle was all too real. Eve tapped into a side of herself that hadn’t seen the light of day in a very long time and felt the part of her that was Livia responding to the challenge Gabrielle put forth.
The battle went on for several candlemarks and it was only because of Eve’s better physical condition that she finally managed to knock Gabrielle to the ground unconscious. She rested herself for quite a bit before moving her sweat-soaked hair from her eyes and rising to stand on wobbly legs.
Unexpectedly, Eli appeared before her and knelt down to lift Gabrielle into his arms. Eve picked up the katana and followed him to Gabrielle’s room.
Gabrielle slept for two days while Eve watched and waited. When she woke on the morning of the third day, it was like she’d turned a corner. She ate decently and though she still did not speak, except to relate more of Xena’s story in whispers to Eve, she walked the gardens a bit before returning to sleep some more.
Eve did get a bit more sparring out of her, but quickly realized that she’d been very lucky Gabrielle had been exhausted that first night. Gabrielle’s skill had surpassed her own and the only reason she didn’t end up bleeding or dead was because Gabriele turned killing blows aside. She did end up with some nice bruises though.
At the end of her third quarter moon, her story was told and Gabrielle was ready to move on. She was still single-minded in her determination to get Xena’s remains to Amphipolis, but she was now thankful for the time spent with Eve. The awkwardness was gone and they had forged a friendship that they would both cherish despite the distance between them.
Gabrielle packed her bag and slung it over her shoulder, then headed out to find Eve. Eve was waiting for her at the compound’s kitchen.
“Thank you for being here, Gabrielle and for sharing that story with me. I know it wasn’t easy, but I think we both needed to hear it.” The bard didn’t answer and Eve continued. “C’mon,” she said, picking up a large bag. “I’ve got something for you.”
Gabrielle followed Eve out the door and to the stables. There sat a horse that reminded her so much of Handsome it nearly made her cry. She turned shocked green eyes to Eve. The Messenger shrugged.
“He wandered in just before you did. He wouldn’t leave and he wouldn’t let anyone ride him either. After our fight the other day, he kept watch over you. I think he came here looking for you.”
Gabrielle stepped over to the horse who greeted her almost familiarly. She crossed back over to Eve and held out her arms, stepping into Eve’s embrace simultaneously. “Thank you,” Gabrielle whispered into the taller woman’s ear. “For everything.”
“Be safe, Gabrielle. I love you.”
Gabrielle’s answer was another brief hug, then she moved back to the horse and mounted him. She clucked her tongue and tightened her legs and Handsome started out of the compound. Gabrielle paused at the entranced and turned and gave Eve a wave. Then she left down the road without another backwards glance.
Aphrodite meanwhile, returned to Olympus to find some answers. The first thing she did was watch the whole tragic story from beginning to end. Then she learned what had brought Xena and Gabrielle to Japa and she went back and did some research on Akemi. What she found infuriated her and she made a quick trip to visit her Asian counterparts.
Dite explained her dilemma and they discovered that Xena really wasn’t in their underworld. They did decide that Akemi would need to be punished for her duplicity and Dite was satisfied that justice would be served to the extent it could be. She wasn’t sure Gabrielle would agree though, especially since Xena seemed to have completely disappeared.
The love goddess popped back to Olympus and started on a god hunt. She went searching for Hades first.
“HADES!!” She waited a beat, then bellowed again. “Uncle Hades!!” She popped into Hades domain, but he was nowhere to be found. She scratched her hands through her hair and opened her mouth, but was stopped by a soft voice behind her.
“He’s not here, Dite. He spends his time in Rome as Pluto now. You know that.”
“Hey, Persephone. What are you doing here?”
Persephone shrugged. “I come back from time to time just to make sure things here are all right. We can’t really go back to Olympus, at least not for a while, but this will always be more home to me than Rome. Hades judges Greek and Roman souls from Rome now and he’s not real happy with the added workload.”
“Do you think he could spare a moment for me? I have a problem.”
“Dite, we’d be glad to have you come stay in Rome. We miss having you around.”
Aphrodite smiled sadly. “I miss you guys too, but someone needs to stay here to keep an eye on things. Besides, I really hate Rome. I do manage to get there occasionally; I just can’t stay very long. It’s not home.”
“Oh, girlfriend that is so very true.”
Dite giggled when she heard the words flow from her rather proper cousin’s mouth. “Careful there, ‘Seph. They’ll accuse you of totally radical blondish tendencies.” They laughed together.
“C’mon, Dite. Let’s go see Hades.”
“You mean Pluto?”
The chamber echoed their laughter as the disappeared in a swirl of sparks and petals.
“Psst… Ha… um, I mean, Pluto. Could I see you privately for a moment?” Persephone questioned softly. The god of the underworld nodded and rose.
“Judgment will continue in one candlemark,” he said and moved back into his private living area. He took his wife into his arms and kissed her before the cooing and chuckling of Aphrodite made them separate, blushing.
“Hello, Uncle. You two are just so cute together. A real walking ad for the love connection.”
“Ahem, yes. Well, as glad as I am to see you here, I’m sure you didn’t come to discuss our love life. What can I do for you?”
Aphrodite became serious instantly. “Uncle, have you seen Xena?”
“Have I seen Xena what?” Hades asked blankly. “She hasn’t come through for judgment, if that’s what you’re asking.”
Dite sighed and her shoulders slumped slightly. “‘K, thanks. Guess I’ll have to keep looking.”
“Looking?” Hades stopped when Persephone put a hand on his arm.
“I’ll explain it to you later.” She turned to Dite. “Can you stay for a while?”
“I wish I could. Let me figure out what happened here and I’ll come back for a longer visit. If you hear anything, let me know, will ya?” She disappeared before they could say a word.
She checked with Odin next, who though no friend of Xena, promised to let Dite know if the warrior passed through his realm. She even dropped down to Egypt and had a talk with Isis. Finally, covering all the bases she could think of, Dite returned to Olympus and went to talk to Ares.
Gabrielle continued her trek westward, moving slowly across the deserts and plains of Kashmir, Mesopotamia, Persia and Assyria, headed for the Mediterranean Sea.
She’d found the ring Aphrodite had given her was actually awkward to adjust to with her weapons, so she took it off and put it into her bag next to Xena’s ashes.
Almost immediately, she felt a change in her demeanor, but she attributed her heightened senses and wariness to being alone on the road. Her first encounter with thugs left her heart racing and her blood pounding. And it left seven decimated men lying at her feet.
After several more experiences that left her bloodlust burning higher than the last, she found a quiet inn where she could rest and try to recoup her lost equilibrium. Gabrielle spent almost a whole day meditating before she remembered the ring and dug it out of her bag. She slid it onto her finger and literally felt her blood calm and settle. She sat down and resumed her meditation and was able to focus to the point that she was centered again.
Gabrielle ruefully acknowledged to herself that she was going to have to adjust her fighting technique to include wearing the ring. Whatever protection it provided, it was going to keep her from losing herself and her mind before she got home.
Days turned into moons before Gabrielle reached the Mediterranean Sea. She’d made the decision to cross to Greece on boat. She wasn’t looking forward to it, but it was the quickest way to get there. And more than anything, Gabrielle was ready to go home.
“ARES! Ares!! Where are you?” Dite stood in the middle of one of his remaining Greek temples and stamped her foot in impatience. She figured her brother would have at least some of the answers she needed.
He popped in with less than his usual theatrical entrance. “What is it Dite? I was in the middle of a skirmish on the Roman border.” He tried to act angry, but she could see the tiredness and profound sadness behind his question.
She took his hand. “C’mon, bro. We need to talk.”
Aphrodite popped them into her boudoir on Olympus and set out a tray of goodies and a flagon of wine. “You wanna level with me Ares? I know you had something to do with Xena’s disappearance. Do you know where she is?”
His shoulders sagged, but he didn’t answer immediately. She curled up beside him and took his hands. Then she looked him in the eye and softened her voice.
“C’mon, bro. Level with me. I know that being both a Greek and Roman god is exhausting. I have to do it too, remember? In that way the rest of family got off easy. The Twilight came to Greece and Xena ‘killed’ them so the one God concept could take root. They went to Rome and we, well, too bad no one but us understands the real truth of that, huh?”
That got a small smile out of him. “Yeah.”
“So level with me, huh? There aren’t many of us left in Greece and we need to stick together. Especially you and me.” She bumped shoulder with him. “We learned that the hard way, didn’t we?”
Ares shuddered at the memories that question invoked. He cleared his throat. “Oh yeah. Not one of the more pleasant experiences in my long life.”
Dite smiled. “You were a cute farmer.”
He tried to glare at her, really he did, but the smile on her face and the twinkle in her eyes was irresistible. “Hmph!” was all he said, but he poured them each a glass of wine and Dite placed the tray on the nearby table.
“Get comfortable, sis. This is a little hard to explain.”
“Does someone want to explain to me why *I* am considered the ditzy one?” Aphrodite muttered to herself when Ares was done speaking. She scrubbed her hands over her face and turned to look at him.
“So you don’t know where she is? Or when she is? Or if she is alive or dead?”
“Um, no?” Ares hurried on with his explanation when Aphrodite sighed loudly. “Look, I just wanted to bring her back to life. It should have worked. No muss, no fuss.”
“And you thought they woulda owed you something, right? A favor you could collect later?”
Ares didn’t even get to start explaining when he felt the smack rock the back of his head. “C’mon, bro. That is way uncool and so not true and you know it. Xena would never have paid a debt like that.” Dite looked at him as the truth dawned. “But Gabrielle might have, huh?” She raised her hand to strike him again, but stopped at his warning glare. “That is dirty, Ares.”
He shrugged. “It would have been fine if it had worked. It should have brought her right to us. Instead… I don’t know what I did wrong.”
“I have spent these last moons going over and over everything that happened. It should have worked.”
Ares snapped his jaws together so quickly he almost bit his tongue. “It doesn’t matter right now. What matters is Gabrielle.”
“Gabrielle. Gabrielle. What *is* it with her?”
Serious blue eyes seared into his deep brown ones. “Tread lightly, Ares. She’s a good person and she is my friend.”
He raised his hands in surrender. “All right. All right. I won’t mess with the irritating blonde. Look, I got things to do. I’ll catch up with you later, okay?” Ares disappeared before Aphrodite could answer.
“Grrrr… he makes me so totally nuts sometimes.” She waved her hand and the food and wine disappeared. The she picked up the wire-rimmed glasses she’d developed an affinity for and slid them on her face while searching for her little remote box.
“All right, Gabrielle,” she mumbled, clicking on the worldwide god web. “Let’s see how long you’ll have to suffer alone, my friend.”
Gabrielle reached the sea and was able to arrange passage on a small merchant ship headed to Greece. She still didn’t speak much, but the men on board quickly learned that she was not to be trifled with.
Every morning she spent time in meditation and drills and in the afternoon she would take a turn at the wheel, or in the crow’s nest. By the fifth day, they were making good time and the captain was pleased with their progress. In the late afternoon, however, their luck took a turn for the worse.
Gabrielle had been sitting in the crow’s nest, when a thin, dark line at the horizon captured her attention. She wouldn’t have given it much thought, except the stirring in her gut made her uneasy and she shimmied down the mast to find the captain.
Archus took one look at the band of clouds and cursed. “All hands, man your stations. She’s gonna be blowin’ rough tonight. Raise the sails and angle us away from its path. I don’t wanna be caught in the middle of this ‘un.”
Archus turned to Gabrielle. “Best if you get below decks, warrior. This be a sailor’s battle.”
A smile almost reached Gabrielle’s eyes as she looked down at her hands. Then she walked to the mainsail and began helping the men hoist it in an effort to outrun the coming storm. The captain shook his head and turned to steer them away from the dark clouds.
Candlemarks passed and darkness fell and still the crew rushed feverishly to keep the ship afloat. The storm had moved in quicker than expected and they’d had to scramble to get things tied down. The waves were rolling the ship sickeningly from side to side, enough to make it necessary to work tied to ropes. It meant each person could only work a very small area of the ship, but there was far less likelihood of anyone falling overboard either.
All night they fought and struggled and with the daybreak came exhaustion and a calm that was almost unnerving. There was no sun, no rain, no wind and no waves and for a little while, everyone was grateful for the chance to rest. It wasn’t long though, before it made the crew restless and the captain was the first to stir, with Gabrielle right behind him. The eeriness was making her jaw ache and her hair stand on end and all she wanted at that moment was a bit of a breeze and the sight of home.
The captain kept looking at the water beneath the ship and back up at the sky, searching for answers. Then the man who’d taken his turn in the crow’s nest hollered down to them and they looked out to see what was causing him such concern. The captain’s eyes widened and he shook his head in disbelief. Then he ran to get his maps and charts from his cabin.
He spread them out, his large hands tracing the paths and patterns on the parchment. “This isn’t possible.”
“What isn’t?” Gabrielle whispered behind him. Archus turned and looked at her, seeing her strength of mind and will in the green eyes now boring into his. He made his decision and nodded to himself.
“Our position.” Archus watched her brow furrow and hastened to explain. “Look… this was where we left Assyria headed for Greece,” he said, pointing to the first map. “But the storm blew us off course. I expected that. It was a nasty storm.”
Gabrielle nodded her understanding and waited for him to continue.
“What I didn’t expect was to get blown to here,” Archus added, indicating a spot on another chart. “If I am reading the land indicators right, we are close to Pompeii.” Gabrielle’s eyes widened and Archus bobbed his head. “Exactly. There is no way we should have come this far that quickly. And something peculiar is happening with the tide… we are being drawn towards land… almost dragged there.”
Gabrielle turned her eyes toward the water, then chanced a look at the land that was coming closer. “Oh my gods,” she whispered to herself, then tugged on the Captain’s sleeve. “Look!”
Her whisper was more unnerving than a shout would have been and Archus glanced up to follow the direction her arm was pointing. His eyes grew large and he looked down at Gabrielle. “Is that…?”
She nodded. “Vesuvius,” she whispered again, her eyes never leaving the horizon. Even from this distance, they could see the fire spewing and spitting toward the sky, filling the air around with the darkness of ash and smoke.
“Raise the sails, lads and man the oars. We’ve got to make time away from here now.” Even as he spoke, day became like night and the air was stifling with ash and the scent of sulfur. Without warning, the ship was pushed away from the landmass and Gabrielle began searching for the cause, knowing what she would find.
Her voice was rough from lack of use and she took Archus by surprise when she screamed. “Pull in the oars!!” He looked at her, then past her to see exactly what caused the almost silent warrior to issue such a forceful command.
“Merda dell’OH!! he muttered, staring for a long moment at the fifteen foot wall of water rapidly approaching the ship. Gabrielle’s shove caused him to come out of his trance and moved him towards the stairwell to repeat the order. Archus motioned to his first mate, but before the man could move towards the mainsail, Gabrielle had unhooked the chakram from her waist and hurled it at the lines, slicing them all neatly and causing the sails to drop.
“Tie everythin’ off and hang on down there, boys! This ‘un’s gonna be nasty.”
The four people left topside tied themselves to the ship and the first mate began praying to Neptune. Gabrielle closed her eyes and whispered her own prayer to Aphrodite. It was enough to pull the goddess away from her frenzied research.
“Oh, this is so radically uncool… it’s creepy. She died… they both did. So when did…? How…?” Aphrodite continued to mumble to herself. She’d been skimming Gabrielle’s lifeline, looking for her death. It wasn’t something the goddess normally did, especially about a friend. But she felt the need to know how long Gabrielle would have to suffer alone and she didn’t like the way things looked.
In all honesty, she’d expected to see Gabrielle’s lifeline end shortly after her return to Greece. For all the talk of the ‘greater good’, Aphrodite understood better than most that Xena and Gabrielle were each other’s greater good. Without her soulmate, Gabrielle would be merely existing and Dite wouldn’t wish that on anyone, especially someone as sensitive as Gabrielle. What she found however, was that Gabrielle’s lifeline extended far past a normal lifetime.
Gabrielle was an immortal.
So now Aphrodite’s mission, in addition to her usual love gigs, was to find out exactly what had caused the change and when it had happened. She started with their crucifixion and ascension into the heaven of Eli’s god. It made the most logical sense. She was in the middle of her review of that time when a whispered plea from Gabrielle caught her attention.
Dite changed the view on her scrying bowl, bringing Gabrielle and the present sharply into focus. “Gnarly wave, man!” was her initial response. Then she saw the tiny boat being lifted in the wall’s not-so-tender embrace and realized what Gabrielle’s prayer was about. “Oh, that totally sucks!”
Closing her eyes, Aphrodite sent a wave of comfort to the bard that cascaded through Gabrielle’s veins like warm wine. Dite felt the change in Gabrielle and smiled, then turned her attention back to her research, keeping one eye on the tiny ship.
She wondered if Gabrielle would one day turn this adventure into a story.
Gabrielle felt herself surrounded by love and she unconsciously relaxed, even as the wall of water grew ominously closer. Suddenly, it lifted them up and pushed the small ship forward with great velocity and strength.
Ash was inches thick on the deck and coated the four people still standing topside. Gabrielle found herself wishing for a way to rid herself of the itchy, smelly mess, then rescinding that wish as the wave began to cascade over the ship.
She heard men screaming in terror and closed her eyes, willing it to be over quickly. I’m sorry, Xena, she said in her mind, but I’m not gonna make it to Amphipolis. I did try though. I’m so tired, Xena. I just want a little bit of peace for us, but that’s never really been our destiny, has it? I love you.
Those were her final thoughts, before the pressure of the water forced her into unconsciousness.
When Gabrielle opened her eyes, the first thing she saw wasn’t the Elysian Fields or Tartarus or heaven or hell and it certainly wasn’t Xena’s face looking back at her. The pain of her reality both physical and emotional hit her so hard she almost crumpled to her knees. Her first sight was of a sludge covered ship and a captain who was seemingly unconscious. There was no sign of the first mate or the steersman.
The boat was gently rocking, aimlessly drifting in what she hoped was the right direction. Slowly Gabrielle loosened herself from the bonds that had secured her to the mizzenmast. Her body ached as though it had been beaten and the stench from the sulfuric ash was indescribable.
She trudged through the sludge, loosening the ropes tied around Archus and easing him to the deck. She patted his face, pleased when his eyelids began to flutter.
“Oh my gods… I feel like a chariot ran over me, repeatedly,” the captain mumbled as he rolled over and sat up. He looked around and smiled at Gabrielle. Then his face fell when he realized they were alone on the deck. “C’mon, warrior, lemme go see what’s left of the crew and get ourselves to Greece. I’m in the mood for dry land, a hot bath, an ale and a woman.”
Gabrielle nodded and walked back to the mainsail and began sorting through the lines. It was going to take a bit of work to run the ropes again, but the chakram had seemed the most expedient way of dealing with the problem at the time. She sighed soundlessly. Given how far the storm had blown them off course and the fact that they were now in the middle of only-gods- knew-where, she figured they had plenty of time to clean, fix and repair and still be done well before they arrived in Greece. A lot would depend on how far the tsunami had pushed them, but she didn’t expect to see land anytime soon.
Her shoulders slumped. She really was tired, right down to her very soul. Gabrielle had been selfishly hoping that the storm would be then end for her. Was it wrong to feel that way, she pondered. She decided it probably was and she really didn’t care. Being unselfish was what had gotten her in this predicament in the first damn place.
The crew came bounding up the stairwell, glad to be alive and out of the hold and Gabrielle smiled in sympathy. She could well remember the times she’d been thrilled to set foot on deck, breathing in the fresh, salty air with relish.
Without much ado, the men fell to work with a will, each one anxious to reach Greece and dry land.
Nightfall enabled the captain to study the stars and his charts and he did so enthusiastically. He was glad to note that the wave had done little physical damage and had actually pushed them as good ways back towards Greece.
He noticed Gabrielle come up beside him and he motioned to her. “Ah warrior. The gods were kind to us. If the winds continue to be favorable, we should see the shores of Greece in less than a quarter moon.”
Gabrielle nodded and turned her attention to the vast darkness of the sky and sea.
Aphrodite was biting her nails, frantically searching through Gabrielle’s history on the worldwide god web. Her research had shown her that they had not actually died on the cross. They were already immortal by that point and their physical bodies were using that time to regenerate. Dite debated briefly on whether she would tell Gabrielle on just how Eli’s god had manipulated them into doing his dirty work.
In fairness, he had offered them absolution for their sins. But it seemed a moot point, especially since Xena rejected that forgiveness in lieu of sacrificing herself yet again on Mt. Fuji.
Not that it mattered at this juncture. The questions now were when had Gabrielle become immortal and what about Xena? If she shared Gabrielle’s immortality, then she was alive out there… somewhere. Aphrodite went back to her research. She was fairly sure that at least part of this news was going to be an unwelcome surprise.
She pulled off her glasses and rubbed her eyes, then scrubbed her hands through her hair. “This is soooo not cool.” Then she clicked the remote box and watched the screen fly backwards through time, looking for the moment when Gabrielle crossed into immortality.
Katerina von Lihp guided her ship into the dock with easy skill and blew out a sigh of relief. They had been almost a year at sea coming around Africa to get to Greece and she was glad to see what had become home for her. She and the crew immediately began unloading the hold.
“Hey, Cap’n… what ’bout all this stuff?” The mate indicated the crates still neatly stacked and sealed boxes that had traveled with them from Higuchi.
Katerina scratched her head thoughtfully. “Leave them for now. I will see if I can find out where they need to go. Go enjoy some time ashore. I know where to find you when I need you.”
The Captain left a small contingent of guards on the ship, then made her way to the nearest temple of love. She really didn’t know who else to turn to and hoped the goddess might have some answers for her.
Aphrodite wasn’t surprised to find worshippers in her temple. She was one of the few remaining active gods in Greece and love was the strongest force in the world, after all. What caught her attention was the mention of Gabrielle’s name and her new moniker, Little Dragon Warrior.
She listened to the plea of this sea captain who had befriended Gabrielle and who showed such concern for her. Then she decided a break from her research was in order and popped down to have a chat with Captain Lihp.
“Yo, babe! Whassup?”
The Captain spun on her heels in surprise, not expecting such a personal greeting from the goddess. She swallowed hard a couple times before she could speak.
“I beg pardon, Aphrodite, but I have a dilemma you might be able to help me with.”
“Oh yeah? Wha… I mean, what’s that?”
“You know of the Little Dragon Warrior, the bard named Gabrielle, hä?” Katerina saw the truth in the blue eyes facing her. “I have a favor to ask.”
“Lay it on me, babe,” Aphrodite said.
Katerina told Aphrodite the bit of Gabrielle’s story she knew from her own point of view, winding up with the things still locked in the hold of her ship. “I didn’t know what else to do with her things. I thought perhaps you….”
Aphrodite looked at the Captain seriously for a long moment. “Why did you come to me? Why not some other god?”
Katerina shrugged. “I do not know. You seemed like the best choice.”
Aphrodite chuckled. “Of course I am the best choice, babe. Love is totally a good choice. It just takes some people a lifetime to figure it out.” She chuckled again. “Tell ya what… I’ll make a place for it and pop it in, ‘k? I’ll hang onto it until Gabrielle is ready for it.”
“Thank you, Aphrodite.”
“Ya done good, Captain Lihp. Totally gnarly job.”
Katerina wasn’t exactly sure how to take that, so she nodded and smiled and headed out to have a bit of fun.
Aphrodite was as good as her word and with a wave of her hand the crates were moved into a storage area of the temple. She briefly considered moving them directly to Olympus, then decided Gabrielle might not appreciate the assumption. She tapped her nails on her teeth, then disappeared in a cascade of flower petals.
Gabrielle was happy to see land again, though surprisingly it wasn’t seasickness that made her ready to walk on flat earth. She glanced again at the ring Aphrodite had given her and wondered if that was the reason behind her lack of seasickness.
Gabrielle shrugged. Whatever the reason, she was glad for it. It had made this part of her voyage at least bearable. She shuddered when she thought about how intolerable the trip would have been if she’d been physically ill on top of everything else.
Now they were pulling into port and Gabrielle sighed. She had finally reached the last leg of her journey and she was anxious to be done with it. The crew lowered the gangway into place and waited for permission to disembark. Archus turned to Gabrielle.
“Thank you,” he said sincerely. “Without your help, I’m not sure we’d have survived.”
She smiled at him and squeezed his arm, then stepped off the ship and headed north without a backwards glance.
Katerina spotted her as Gabrielle set foot on solid ground and raced to catch her before she disappeared in the crowd. “Little Dragon!” she called, hoping to be heard above the din of the marketplace.
Gabrielle looked around, knowing no one here knew of that particular title. When she spotted Captain Lihp, she stopped and waited for the other woman to approach.
Katerina was appalled at the harsh changes the year of travel had wrought in the younger woman. There was still no light in her eyes and her body was all hard muscle and bone. Her hair was still short, though carelessly cut, as though it was kept short because it was easier to manage and not for the way it looked. Gabrielle’s skin was a deep bronze and she bore a few more scars than she’d worn in Higuchi.
“I am glad to see you, Little Dragon. I have something that belongs to you.” Gabrielle held up a hand, but the Captain continued speaking. “Not the crates and boxes. I have stored those with a friend until you want them.”
She extended the arm she’d held behind her and Gabrielle could not contain the sharp gasp that rose from her lips, nor the stab of pain that accompanied it. Hesitantly, she reached forward to take the object from Katerina. Xena’s sword. It would make the final journey with her.
“Thank you,” she whispered, but the words and the tone spoke volumes to the Captain. She nodded to Gabrielle.
“Gods speed you on your journey, warrior.” Then she disappeared into the crowd, leaving Gabrielle alone with her private grief.
Gabrielle began making her way towards Amphipolis at a fast, steady place. So near her goal, she was ready to be done with it. So each day she was up before the sun and she walked with very few breaks until the sun had set. Nights were used for sparring and meditation and the rare bit of sleep she could get before waking in a cold sweat. Time was supposed to make it better… make it hurt less, but still all she felt was emptiness.
Occasionally she encountered the odd roving band of thugs, but after decimating the first few of them, they began to steer clear of her. She wondered if they had some sort of relay system to let others know of her and smirked. Then it occurred to her that they should have had one of those full cycles ago. It would have saved her and Xena a lot of trouble. Her smile faded at that thought.
Days passed and after nearly a moon of steady travel, she entered the outskirts of what had once been the thriving town of Amphipolis. Gabrielle shuddered a little, remembering the last time they had been there. Not much was left. The inn was in ruins and empty shacks that had once been living households now toppled in on themselves in decrepitude. Gabrielle followed the road past the inn, to where the family crypt stood silent sentinel.
She took a deep breath and opened her pouch, removing her flint and striker. She found several small torches at the entrance and lit one carefully. She moved around the room lighting the others, before coming to stand next to Lyceus.
“Hello, Lyceus,” came her whispered voice. “You probably don’t remember me, but this is Gabrielle. I’ve come to keep a promise to your sister.” She waited a moment, until she felt like she had his blessing to continue, then moved to where Solan’s ashes had been placed.
“Hi, Solan. It’s your turn to look after your mom, since I can’t do it anymore, okay? Make sure she eats her vegetables.” She wiped the dust off his urn and moved to Cyrene. “I’m sorry, Mom. I did my best, but it wasn’t enough. Take care of her, Cyrene. She’ll need you to keep an eye on her.”
Gabrielle wiped the tears from her face before moving to an empty slab. She laid the sword across the top then gently placed the chakram on its hilt. She set her bag down and removed the pot, tenderly unwrapping it from its cloth covering. Gabrielle set it in the middle of the slab and took a step back.
“Goodbye, Xena. I don’t think we will meet as soulmates again. I haven’t felt you since that day and I think that is our punishment. This wasn’t your destiny and your choice to stay with Akemi has thrown our karmic cycles out of kilter. Perhaps one day, we will cross paths, but I don’t think the gods will be that kind. Good rest, my love… you’ve earned it.”
The rending of her soul as she surrendered to the inescapable made her keen in agony. She welcomed the darkness when it came.
Gabrielle was curled into a tiny ball beside Xena’s remains when Aphrodite found her.
The goddess reached out a hand to touch her, then recoiled at the pain that emanated from the bard in waves. Dite steeled herself, then scooped Gabrielle into her arms.
“C’mon, girlfriend. We gotta talk.”
Gabrielle came back to herself slowly, fully expecting the emptiness of an afterlife alone. It really didn’t matter where she ended up. It couldn’t be worse than the tortures she’d already lived through.
She blinked her eyes open, trying to focus enough to understand where she was. Her first impression was pink. She was surrounded by pink. Her brow furrowed, trying to recall this much pink in any afterlife she’d seen.
Gabrielle raised a hand to rub her forehead and noted that she was clean and encased in some familiar pink pajamas. “Aphrodite?” in a bare whisper.
Sparkles and rose petals fell on the bed as Dite popped into being beside her. “Hiya, sweet pea.” She combed gentle hands through the short blonde hair. “How ya doin’?” Her blue eyes filled with tears at the aching emptiness she saw reflected in the dull green eyes facing her.
Gabrielle fell into Aphrodite’s open arms and her slight frame shook with silent sobs. Aphrodite felt tears of sympathy slide down her own face while Gabrielle clung to her. How long they stayed in this embrace, Gabrielle couldn’t have said. But finally her crying slowed and she eased back.
“Sorry,” she said softly, wiping her eyes.
“Why, sweetie?” Aphrodite rubbed the muscular arm, doing her best to offer comfort. She wasn’t sure how Gabrielle was going to take the news she had to give her and she had already been through so much.
“I should be out of tears by now,” came the answer, accompanied by a watery smile.
“Oh babe… your heart is a lot like mine. You’ll always have tears to shed. Some happy, some sad, some angry, some relieved. It’s the way of love.”
Gabrielle pulled away and her eyes became cold and distant. Even her whisper went flat. “Well, no offense, Aphrodite, but they way of love doesn’t work for me anymore. The price is too high.” She slipped from the bed and went to stand at the window. “I appreciate your bringing me here, but I need to go.”
“Go where?” Dite asked softly, stepping up behind Gabrielle, but not touching her.
“It doesn’t matter now. I’ve done what I set out to do.”
“Then will you do me a favor? Please?”
Gabrielle turned, intrigued by the request. “If I can, sure.”
“Stay and talk to me a little while. I get lonely here with just me and Ares and when I’m in Rome, I have so much work to do that I rarely get to visit with the other gods. I’d just like a little girl talk between friends.”
Gabrielle nodded. “I’m not sure how much talking I will do, but I can sure listen while you tell on about things. And you can start with that ‘other gods’ comment. I thought they were killed in the twilight.”
“No, that is what Eli’s radical new god wanted everyone to think, so he could get a better foothold here in Greece. Most of the family has like, moved on under different names in Rome, though a few of us still work both gigs. Let me tell ya, sister, it ain’t easy either. Why just the other day….”
Aphrodite talked until Gabrielle fell asleep again and she tucked the bard into bed. “Tomorrow, Little One, we have to have some serious conversation.” And she twinkled out of the bedroom, leaving Gabrielle soundly sleeping without dreams for the first time in over a year.
“Rest well, my friend. Tomorrow is soon enough for this news.”
When Gabrielle woke the second time, she wasn’t surprised to see pink. She was surprised to note she was almost hungry and she noticed a trencher of food on a table near the bed. Propped next to the still warm loaf of bread was a note.
Come see me in the scrying room before you leave. We have something to talk about.
The note wasn’t signed, but the little hearts and curlicues would have been a dead giveaway regardless. Gabrielle took a portion of the bread and spread some of the soft cheese on it, then took a bite. It was good and she took a second.
She finished the bread and changed her clothes, then wandered out the hall towards the only sound she heard. Strangely, it sounded as though Dite was talking to herself, but Gabrielle shrugged. She’d find out soon enough.
As soon as she crossed the threshold, Aphrodite jumped and tittered nervously. “Oh, hi Gab!” a little too brightly. She pulled the glasses of her face and chewed on an earpiece. “Um, why don’t you have a seat? You’re lookin’ totally fab today. Love the tat. Did ya sleep well? How was your breakfast? Andbythewayyou’reanimmortal.”
Gabrielle sank into the chair Aphrodite pushed at her, trying to dissimilate the conversation the goddess had just thrown at her. She shook her head. “Good morning, Aphrodite. Would you repeat everything you just said very slowly, please? I’m pretty sure I missed something important.”
Aphrodite dropped the glasses on her desk and rubbed her face. Then she sat down and took Gabrielle’s hands in her own.
“Okay, look. You’re an immortal….” She didn’t get to say any more. Gabrielle jerked her hands free and stormed out of the room.
Aphrodite scratched her head and blew out a breath. “Well, that went well,” she commented to herself, before popping out to find the woman she called friend.
Aphrodite stood in the archway, just watching Gabrielle. The bard sat hunched over on a bench in the rose garden, hands loosely clasped between her knees. Finally, the goddess walked over to Gabrielle and sat down next to her. She didn’t speak or touch Gabrielle, but waited for her to make the first move.
Dite lost track of the time they sat together silent and unmoving before Gabrielle took a deep breath. And it was only because she was listening that she heard the bare whisper when Gabrielle finally spoke.
“Aphrodite, we have been friends for a lot of full cycles and never have I seen you be deliberately cruel… until now.” Gabrielle lifted her face to the sky and Dite tried not to take offense when she saw the depth of pain Gabrielle still carried. She knew the reaction came from the shock as much as grief, but the words still cut deeply.
“Gabrielle,” Dite said softly. “Have I ever lied to you?”
Gabrielle dropped her head and closed her eyes. Aphrodite reached up and took her chin, gently turning the bard’s face towards her own. “Gabrielle,” she repeated. “Have I ever lied to you? Especially when it was this important?”
Gabrielle raised a hand and wiped the tears from her face, then shook her head and opened her eyes. “No,” she whispered and cleared her throat. “No,” she said again more firmly and just a little louder. “But Aphrodite, I’m not immortal. I can’t be. I… I died.” She closed her eyes and swallowed hard before meeting Dite’s sympathetic blue eyes. “Xena had a better shot at immortality…” she swallowed, “And we know that didn’t happen.”
“But it did.” A simple statement that fell into a wellspring of silence.
“What are you saying?” Gabrielle grasped Aphrodite arms so hard that the goddess winced, knowing it would have left bruises had she been human.
She eased one arm from Gabrielle’s grip, allowing Gabrielle to retain a firm hold on her other wrist and hand. She noted that Gabrielle was shaking and stood up. Aphrodite gazed into the tear-filled green eyes, seeing a spark of hope for the first time in over a year and she smiled.
“C’mon, babe. I got a totally wicked story to share.”
They settled into the scrying room, which was actually part of Aphrodite’s chambers and Dite eased Gabrielle down onto the bed. She snapped her fingers and instantly Gabrielle found herself neatly encased in more pink silk and tucked into the big bed holding a cup of something that smelled rich and sweet.
The goddess could tell Gabrielle was still in shock and motioned to her with a little wave. “Try it. It’ll make you feel radically better. I gotta hook this in to the big screen for ya.”
Gabrielle took a sniff of the beverage, then took a tiny sip. A brief smile crossed her face and she took a larger swallow. Aphrodite caught the change in her expression and smiled in return. “Great stuff, huh? Nothing comforts like good hot chocolate. Ah, there we go. Now,” she wiggled into place beside Gabrielle and lifted her own cup to her lips. “I’m gonna give ya the highlights. Ya know, show ya what happened and explain a few things. Then we can talk and I’ll try to answer any questions you’ve still got, k?”
Gabrielle nodded, then watched a much younger version of herself dance into view. She felt the seductive rhythm of the music and her mind went back to that cool fall Festival. She remembered clearly now the moment she’d been bitten, though it was nothing but a blur at the time.
“You remember this, right?” Aphrodite looked at Gabrielle when she’d paused the god web. The blonde head nodded. “Okay, do you remember drinking the blood from the chalice?”
Gabrielle turned her gaze inward and she started shaking as her memory cleared. Aphrodite took the cup from her hands and started the scrying bowl again.
“Xena knocked the chalice from your hands, but only after you’d had your first drink. It was so intoxicating you were actually taking your second swallow when the chakram knocked the cup away from your lips.”
Gabrielle closed her eyes and Dite stopped the picture once more. “Yes,” she whispered.
Aphrodite took Gabrielle’s hands in her own and gently chafed them. “And even though you and Xena weren’t lovers yet, you wanted to share that feeling and when she commanded you….” Aphrodite trailed off then continued. “How many times once you were lovers did you draw blood?”
Abruptly Gabrielle jerked away and stalked from the bed. “Gabrielle,” Dite said softly from her place on the bed. “I wasn’t spying on you. It’s taken me moons of research to put all this together.”
Gabrielle hugged her arms around herself. “It wasn’t often. And never deliberate. It wasn’t something we talked about.” She turned back to Aphrodite. “But that wouldn’t have made Xena immortal. She didn’t drink from the chalice.”
“No, but she did eat ambrosia shortly thereafter and that pretty much sealed the deal for her. Your bite gave her the burning and the ambrosia did the rest.”
It was quiet for a while after that, as Gabrielle pondered the truth of Aphrodite’s words. Finally she turned and went back to the bed, sitting down gingerly. Her head ached from the thoughts running through it, her throat hurt from the now unaccustomed conversation and her eyes burned from both shed and unshed tears. Aphrodite looked at her sympathetically.
“I’m sorry, Gab. If there was an easier way to get you through this, you know I would.”
“I know,” Gabrielle whispered. “It’s just a little overwhelming and so many things still don’t make sense. Especially since I haven’t felt Xena’s presence….”
“I know, babe, believe me. Here,” handing the hot chocolate back to the bard. “I added marshmallows. I think you’re due all the comfort you can get at this point.”
Gabrielle’s eyebrow rose, wondering what a marshmallow was, then seeing the tiny white islands floating in her cup. She tasted one and gave Aphrodite a small smile. “Perks of being a goddess, huh?”
Dite chuckled. “One of them, yeah. You feeling any better? Ready to move on?”
Gabrielle rubbed her face with her hands. “I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready for this, but there are things I need to know. So let’s do it.”
Aphrodite nodded and slipped the glasses back on her face, consulting the notes she had written. “I guess your first question is about your lack of bacchae behavior, huh?”
Gabrielle nodded. “Well, that’d be one of them, yeah.”
Dite looked at her notes again. “Well, babe… what can I tell ya? Love conquers all.” She sighed at Gabrielle’s blank look. “The strength of the love you and Xena shared eliminated a lot of the need for blood. Your passion was focused in other directions.” Aphrodite smiled at the blush that suffused the bard’s features.
“Be glad, babe. The bond you two have is totally, radically, one hundred percent the real deal and so rare that most spend their entire lives never having seen it… much less lived it.”
“And now you’re asking me to spend eternity without it??” Gabrielle clasped an arm to her chest trying to ease the pain to breathe. “Gods… it would have been better to have never had it.”
“No sweet pea. Gimme a chance here, ‘kay? Your story will have a happy ending, promise.” Gabrielle had to smile just the tiniest bit at Aphrodite’s vehemence. She’d never promised the bard anything without delivering. Gabrielle nodded her agreement and the goddess sighed in relief.
“Okay, where was I?” She ran a finger down the page. “Oh yeah… your focused passion. Anyway, there was still plenty of fighting to satisfy any lingering bloodlust.” She looked at Gabrielle seriously. “Didn’t you ever noticed that the fighting was always more violent and intense when you two were at odds? There was a while there… girlfriend, even I had to look to find the love.”
She waved her hands. “Anyway, it doesn’t matter now. We have the present to worry about. You with me so far?”
“I think so. Our soul bond took care of a lot of the lust and our fighting took care of the rest.”
“Okay, I can accept that, I guess. But it doesn’t explain why we died… why Xena is dead.”
“Here, finish your hot chocolate and let me tuck you back into bed. This is gonna take a little while and we may as well be, like, comfortable.”
Aphrodite settled Gabrielle into the big bed and fussed about pouring up more chocolate. Gabrielle absently wondered why she was making such a physical effort instead of merely snapping her fingers. For her part, Aphrodite puttered until she ran out of things to do. Then she took a deep breath. This was the hard part.
“The first time you died after you became immortal was when you took Hope into the pit. Do you remember what happened?”
Gabrielle closed her eyes. Her memories of that time were blurred and she focused on the tightly. “I remember running,” she whispered, “looking into Xena’s eyes… taking Hope over the edge of the pit and then… searing pain. I hit a ledge, I think. I…. Ares said he….”
“Ares would have said anything to convince Xena to return to him, you know that. Let me show you what really happened.” Aphrodite turned back to the worldwide god web and started the picture just as the bard and Hope toppled into the steaming fissure.
Gabrielle forced her eyes to watch, though she cringed to hear herself scream. About halfway down, she did hit a ledge and her bones shattered with a nauseating crunch. Hope was swallowed up by the flame and they both disappeared and for several days, Gabrielle remained unmoving on the ledge.
Finally, healed enough to move, she forced herself to climb from the pit. She hadn’t had enough time to recover her strength though and when she reached the edge, she fell out onto the floor near the altar.
A band of gypsies found her there and took her to the nearest hospice, where she spent almost another seven days unconscious. When she came around the second time, she immediately left to find her agonized soulmate.
“You okay?” Aphrodite asked kindly. Gabrielle held her fist to her mouth and the goddess wasn’t sure it if it was to keep from screaming or throwing up. Gabrielle nodded once curtly.
“Yeah. I was just remembering….” she got out before bolting for the bathing room. Aphrodite sighed and popped in behind her. She ran a cool cloth on Gabrielle’s neck and held her when she was done.
“You wanna hear the rest, or you wanna wait ’til later? It’s not gonna get any easier ’til we’re done. ”
Bloodshot green eyes looked at Aphrodite. “Let’s get it over with.” Gabrielle rinsed her mouth and Dite gave her some mint to settle her stomach. Then they moved back to the bedroom and the goddess moved the timeframe on the screen.
“The next death I have for you both is your crucifixion on the Ides of March. This was a fubar all the way around.”
“How so? Heaven wouldn’t have been a bad place to spend eternity.”
“Yeah, if you coulda stayed there, but that’s not why Eli’s god brought you there and he had no intention of letting you stay. He was using your souls to fight his battle while your bodies healed. Unfortunately, Eli pulled you souls back into your bodies before they were ready and you KNOW the fiasco that caused.” She gave Gabrielle a meaningful look.
Gabrielle gave her a rueful chuckle. “Uh, yeah. I think that was the start of our ‘make war, not love’ stage. We fought everything and everyone, including and especially each other.” She snickered softly. “When we finally made up though….” Her face flushed bright red at the memories.
“Mmm hmm… no kidding. I *felt* that reunion. Talk about rocking the world!” She grinned at Gabrielle. “You two were just so good together… and you will be again.” Gabrielle sobered.
“How, Aphrodite? How can you say that? Xena is dead and even her spirit is gone. She promised me she would always be there for me… that even death wouldn’t separate us, but I have not seen her or felt her presence since that day.”
“Whoa! Hold on! Slow down just a little there, hot shot! I’ll explain it to you if you’ll give me a minute.”
Gabrielle scrubbed her face with her hands. “I’m sorry. I….”
Aphrodite embraced the bard, kissing the top of her blonde head lightly. “No worries, babe. I really do understand.”
Gabrielle gently returned the hug. “Thank you,” she whispered.
“Now remember… in every instance so far, you and Xena have had a body to return to. It has simply been a matter of letting the body regenerate and once it was restored, your soul returned.”
“Right….” Gabrielle trailed off, trying to follow Aphrodite’s train of thought.
“When Xena had you burn her body, it was with the intention of restoring it on Mt. Fuji. But it just made it impossible for her spirit to rejoin her body when you missed the sunset. Because there is no body to renew, there is no place for the spirit to live in.”
“Okay, so her spirit just disappeared?? I’m not seeing that happy ending you promised me Aphrodite!”
“Shh… shh… calm down, babe. I’m getting to that.” She stroked her hands through Gabrielle’s hair, willing her to peace. “Now, calm down and just listen, ‘kay? This is where things get kinda screwy.” She took a deep breath.
“What Ares did, or tried to do, was to call her back… restore her body and spirit. But it obviously didn’t work… for a couple reasons, I think.”
“Well, yeah,” Aphrodite answered defensively. “Nothing like this has ever happened before and I’m not totally sure what incantation he spoke.” She held up her hands. “Wait and let me finish, ‘kay?” Gabrielle nodded and settled back down. Dite got up to pace.
The goddess pulled her glasses off and set them down, running her hands through her hair in frustration. “From what I can figure out, it didn’t work for two main reasons… first, our power in Japa is negligible. He didn’t have the strength to pull it off. The second reason would be that he wasn’t totally prepared to perform the ritual correctly. Considering his frame of mind that day, I’m surprised he actually made it to you.”
“Can you fix it?”
Aphrodite shook her head. “It’s fixable, but I can’t do it by myself. But we might be able to together… you and me.”
Gabrielle flung back the cover and stood on wobbly legs. “Let’s go.”
Aphrodite shook her head again and Gabrielle wanted to stomp her feet in sheer frustration. “No. Not yet. You are not strong enough and I need to do a little more research. So you get back in that bed and go to sleep like a good girl and let Dite finish up the work I have to do, ‘kay? Then we’ll see about getting that totally radical warrior babe back in your arms where she belongs.”
Gabrielle stared at the goddess for what seemed like candlemarks before acknowledging the wisdom of this course of action. Ares had been unprepared to do whatever it was he had done and Xena had ended up who-knew-where with their bond broken. Besides, she was exhausted in her very soul and was ready to collapse.
Gabriele emitted a small sigh and closed her eyes. “All right, Aphrodite,” she said softly as she crawled back into bed. “Thank you.”
Dite looked surprised. “For what, sweet pea?”
“Caring,” came the mumbled answer before Gabrielle’s breathing deepened into sleep.
“No worries, babe. I always have.” She smoothed Gabrielle’s hair away from her face and let her touch linger on the bard’s soft skin before disappearing, leaving only a trace of rose petals behind.
It could have been candlemarks; it could have been days. Gabrielle couldn’t tell how much time had passed when she awoke from her sleep. But for the first time since Xena’s death, she felt hope. She was still trying to process the information Aphrodite had given her, but what stood out in her mind was the fact that Xena’s spirit was still alive and looking for a way to come home.
She pushed the covers back and wandered out of the room, following the muttering to another room in Aphrodite’s chamber. The goddess sat at a huge desk, hidden by scrolls. The floor was littered with discarded notes and even as she stood there, a wad of parchment came flying over the top of the pile.
“She shoots! She….”
“… misses!” Gabrielle answered, as the paper ball hit the tip of the overflowing basket and fell to the floor. Dite’s blonde curls popped up from the top of her desk.
“Oh, hiya, cutie. How’d ya sleep?”
“Very well. Morpheus was kind.”
“Yeah, I asked him to be. He’s a good god.” Gabrielle didn’t reply, though she looked skeptical, remembering her first run-in with the god of dreams. “Anyway, ya look way better and I think I have everything like, figured out.” She lifted up several scrolls, rummaging through them. “Soon’s I find my notes. I know they’re in here. I just had… ah hah!”
“C’mon, Gab. We can go over this stuff in the hot tub. I so need to soak after all this. I haven’t worked this hard in like, ages.”
Gabrielle didn’t get a chance to respond before she found herself up to her neck in warm bubbles. She closed her eyes, relishing the comfort. It was only when Aphrodite popped in right next to her that her green orbs opened reluctantly.
“Ooooh,” she groaned as she settled back into the water and closed her eyes. “This is just what the goddess ordered. I feel better already.” Dite stayed that way for a few minutes before sitting up and reaching for her notes.
“Okay. I got good news and I got bad news.”
Gabrielle ran her wet hands through her hair, then covered her eyes. “Of course you do. Give me the bad news first.”
Aphrodite chewed her lip. “Well, the bad news is I don’t know where Xena is.”
“Then how can we return her? We still don’t have a body and now you’re telling me we don’t have a spirit either!”
“Take a chill pill, babe. I think I’ve found the solution to your little problem.”
“YOU THINK?!? Whaddya mean you THINK??”
“Hey, I’m doing my best here Gab! Cut me some slack, all right? I wasn’t the one who got you into this mess!”
Gabrielle’s head dropped. “I’m sorry, Aphrodite. I know you’re doing me a huge favor and here I am being a bitch. Go ahead.”
The goddess took Gabrielle’s chin in her hand and lifted Gabrielle’s face until their eyes met. “No worries, ‘kay?” She smiled, hoping to get one in return. She wasn’t disappointed.
“You’re a good friend, Aphrodite.”
“That’s probably the nicest real compliment I’ve ever gotten.”
“It is also the truth.” Gabrielle paused. “So what’s the plan?”
“Well, we have Xena’s ashes. You have immortal blood. I found a ritual that will allow you to use your blood to re-form her body. The fact that you’re soul bound to one another should call her soul to you and once her body has regenerated, you’ll be a rockin’ couple again.”
“So when can we do this?”
“I think we need to go to Macedonia. We don’t want Ares finding out about this and totally screwing it up.”
“You really think he would?”
“Gab, I think he’s a little… um….”
“Well, um… blind, maybe… where she is concerned.”
Gabriele snorted. “Okay. Why Macedonia?”
“Couple reasons. Ares won’t look for us there for one thing. And Hephie had a radical hideaway there for another.”
Gabrielle chewed her nails. “Okay, when can we go?”
Aphrodite smile sympathetically. “Anxious, huh?” Gabrielle just nodded. “Lemme finish my bath and get a bite of something to eat and we’ll go.” She pointed a bubbly finger at the bard. “You have to eat too. This is gonna take a lot out of ya.”
They had stopped briefly at Xena’s family crypt and Aphrodite had offered to go in to fetch Xena’s ashes and weapons alone. Gabrielle had shaken her head and smiled.
“Thank you, Aphrodite, but it’s my responsibility. Wait here. I’ll be right back.” And she ducked inside before the goddess could answer. She sat down, pondering the fortitude of her immortal friend.
Gabrielle lit the torch, looking around with new eyes. Hope had replaced despair and she moved with a light step towards where Xena remains had been placed. Reverently she lifted the ashes, re-wrapping them before placing them in the bottom of her bag. She picked up the sword and chakram, looking around her once more.
“If this works… *when* this works, we will come back and clean up here. You’re all family and you deserve better than to be forgotten. So wish us luck, okay?” The bard felt her optimism returning and it was with a light heart and a lighter step that she exited the crypt.
“All righty, Aphrodite. Let’s do this.”
Aphrodite chuckled, hearing herself reflected in Gabrielle’s speech. Then she waved her hand and the two of them disappeared.
Hephaestus’ hideaway was, well… a little creepy in Gabrielle’s opinion. They’d had to walk from the hidden entrance and there had been a maze of hallways and corridors to traverse before they’d reached their destination. Aphrodite had been careful to mark each passageway and booby trap so they wouldn’t have difficulties getting back out. She didn’t figure Xena would be in the mood to play games then.
“I asked Hephie about making a shortcut, but it was a total no go,” Dite said as they walked through the maze. “He said the whole point was some radical privacy,” Aphrodite blushed, “which was a really good thing sometimes. Ahem, anyway… we do have to be careful though. There are some wicked triggers in here that could trap even a god.”
Aphrodite chewed her nail for a minute before facing Gabrielle. “I don’t think Hephie was being completely honest with me about this place though.”
Gabrielle turned to face the goddess, careful to keep her eyes on the route they were taking. “How so?”
“Well, a lot of the surprises will lock you *in* here, not just keep ya out, ya know. The Eye makes it impossible to pop in and out, which is why were walking through this grody part. And Hephie didn’t start building this place ’til AFTER that whole thing with Dahok. You know.”
Gabrielle most certainly did know and she paled at the memories that name elicited.
“So anyway,” the goddess continued. “I’ve always kinda wondered, in the back of my mind, what the real story was. Turn left. Ah… here we are.”
Gabrielle looked around the austere room, finding the Eye with no trouble and taking in the rest slowly. There were sconces around the room and one wall that seemed to double as a door. A large, flat altar sat beneath the Eye and a few more traps were scattered randomly. There was no furniture to speak of and Aphrodite gestured to the altar. She got out her notes.
“Okay, you need to scatter Xena’s ashes on the altar. Carefully, though it’s not like there is any wind here to blow them away.”
Gabrielle hesitated, then lifted the lid. The scent almost made her gag in reflex and she stood very still clenching her jaw until the urge passed. “Does it matter? I mean, do I need to form them into a pattern, spread them evenly, what?”
Aphrodite ran her finger down the scroll. “Doesn’t say. I’d have to say spread them evenly though. Not like you can tell what ashes go where, ya know?” She turned her attention back to her notes, missing Gabrielle’s shiver.
Gabrielle gingerly shook the pot, trying for even distribution of the ashes on the stone. It took a while and Aphrodite was sitting on the floor in meditation. When she was finished, Gabrielle walked back to the goddess and placed a tentative hand on her shoulder. Dite’s eyes slowly opened and she smiled up at the bard.
“All done, sweetie?” Gabrielle nodded. “‘Kay, then, let’s see. Hmm, put the sword here,” gesturing, “and the chakram here,” pointing to another spot. “Oh wait… you’re gonna need to use the chakram to spill the blood.” She wrinkled her face in distaste.
Gabrielle complied, putting the sword into place and separating the chakram. She laid one piece on the altar and kept the other in her right hand. She looked back at Aphrodite, waiting for further instruction.
“Okay, um… this is the gross part. You’ve got to… ew… um, make a cut deep enough to bleed really well.” She shuddered. “You’re gonna have to share about half your body’s blood to make this work.”
Gabrielle’s eyes got big, but she nodded her acceptance.
“Don’t worry, babe. I’ll be here to keep an eye on you.” Dite took a deep breath. “You ready?”
Gabrielle raised the chakram and Aphrodite took the bard’s left hand in her own. With her right hand, she stroked the inside of Gabrielle’s left wrist. “Here,” she said quietly. “This one leads from your heart.”
Gabrielle bit her lip and closed her eyes, then lifted the chakram and sliced neatly without a flinch. Blood began running slowly and green eyes opened and focused on Aphrodite for a minute, then she turned her attention to the ashes that were very slowly becoming soaked red.
Ashes that were forming into the ghostly outline of a well-known shape. Gabrielle felt her heart clench at the sight of the familiar form that she had missed with aching intensity for more than twelve moons. She felt the tears flow and watched as they fell unhindered to the altar and mixed with the blood and ash.
At that moment, Ares burst in on them, disrupting the ritual causing everything to halt. The ashes were scattered and Gabrielle screamed in agony when the blood tried to reinsert itself into her being.
Aphrodite touched a spot on Gabrielle’s neck, rendering her mercifully unconscious. Then the goddess got up and slapped Ares, furious at this final interference.
“Gods damn you to Tartarus, Ares! We nearly had her!”
“What? Nearly had who??”
“Xena, you idiot. We were bringing Xena home and you just totally screwed it up!”
“Well how was *I* supposed to know?? Not like you told me!”
“Exactly… I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want you here… for this very reason. You have no sense where Xena is concerned and everything you’ve done lately has simply made things worse!”
“Go away, Ares. I don’t want you here when Gabrielle wakes up. She doesn’t deserve the kind of pain you’ve inflicted and I don’t think we can fix this. There aren’t enough of Xena’s ashes left to work with.” She hesitated as a look of pain crossed his face. “Please Ares,” she said quietly. “Just go.”
He looked at Gabrielle, still lying mercifully unconscious near the altar. He sealed the wound on her wrist, then leaned forward to brush a kiss across her temple. “I’m sorry, Gabrielle. You were a worthy opponent, but you didn’t deserve this. Neither of you did.”
He didn’t even glance at Aphrodite whose jaw was hanging open. He simply turned on his heel and left the way he’d come.
Aphrodite knelt at Gabrielle’s side and gently shook her awake. She wondered how the bard would feel about the fact that Ares had managed to find them and mess everything up but good. She wondered how he’d managed to locate them, then the green eyes opened and her attention refocused on the woman who lay at her knees.
Gabrielle gasped, the return to consciousness abrupt and unexpected. In that instant, she felt an intimate warmth flow through her soul and she rejoiced. She clenched Aphrodite’s hand in her own, looking back at her with tear-filled eyes and a bright smile. “I feel her, Aphrodite. She’s alive!”
She looked around. “Xena? Xena??” Her attention came back to the goddess. “Where is she, Aphrodite? I know she’s alive… I can feel her.” She put Dite’s hand on her chest. “Here. Her heart is beating with mine.”
Aphrodite smiled and clasped her hand, feeling the heartbeat in a steady rhythm before pulling away and pinching the bridge of her nose with her fingers. “Well, then… I have good news and I have bad news.”
Gabrielle clutched the hand she still held, causing Dite to wince in reflex.
“Careful with the merchandise, hon. You’re gonna leave a bruise.” She gently extracted her hand and covered the bard’s own. “Now, the good news is, she’s alive, right? That’s a good thing.”
“Riiiiiight… so what’s the bad news?”
“The bad news is she’s not here and I don’t know where she is.”
“But we can fix that, right? We can do the ritual again?”
“Um, no. There aren’t enough ashes left to try again.”
“WHAT?!?” Gabrielle jumped to her feet. “Where is he? I’ll kill him myself!”
“Whoa, whoa, Gab! Slow down. He’s gone. You can’t kill him anyway, remember? He’s a god again.” She put her arm around Gabrielle’s shoulders, holding tight when the bard tried to shrug her off. Then holding tighter when the shoulders beneath her arm slumped in defeat. She cupped Gabrielle’s chin and drew her eyes up to meet her own.
“You know she’s alive, right?” She waited for the acknowledgement to come. “Right… so you can use the connection you feel from her to find her. Should be a piece of cake.”
Gabrielle snorted in laughter through her tears. “Aphrodite, nothing has ever been a piece of cake for us. Somehow I don’t see this being any different.”
Aphrodite chuckled sympathetically and drew the bard’s head to her lips. “Good point.” She looked around and shuddered. “Let’s get out of here. This place is giving me the creeps now.”
They exited slowly, following the markers Aphrodite had left and now painstakingly removed. “Heph didn’t mark it for a reason. I’m just trying to respect that,” Dite explained in answer to Gabrielle’s unasked question.
When they found their way out, Aphrodite replaced the shielding that had been in place. Then she waved them back to Olympus.
Dite popped them right to Gabrielle’s room, knowing the effect of blood loss would hit her hard and suddenly. She surmised correctly and was just able to catch the bard as she slipped to the floor. The goddess got Gabrielle tucked into bed, then moved to her own room. This adventure had exhausted her more than she was willing to admit and she still had her regular love biz to take care of. She decided to take a nap.
Green eyes opened slowly, the pert nose twitching at the scent of cinnamon and sugar that wafted her direction. She stretched leisurely, smiling at the renewed warmth she felt coursing through her soul and marveling at the hunger gnawing at her belly.
“Guess immortality didn’t completely take away my appetite.” Gabrielle flung the covers from her and rose from the bed. She padded over the thick carpet to the table, smiling at the steaming cinnamon rolls that greeted her vision.
She brought the plate back to the bed and sat down, her gaze turning inward. The distinctive warmth that she knew was Xena was distant, but it was real. She smiled softly, feeling a renewed hope.
“I will find you, Xena. Somehow, some way, I will find you and we’ll be together again.”
It was still dark when the blue eyes finally opened and looked around, disoriented. This wasn’t the afterlife she’d expected it to be. In fact, she felt a distinctive hunger in her belly and a burning in her blood. It didn’t seem to be an afterlife at all. She poked at her torso and pinched her arm, concluding that her naked flesh was real.
Slowly, she rose to her feet, looking around in confusion. She wasn’t in Japa and it didn’t look like Greece, Chin, Britannia or Egypt. The land was flat and as her eyes adjusted, she realized she could see a very long way. There was a light in the distance and heedless of her nakedness, the warrior headed that way.
She tottered for a few steps, then stumbled and she realized she was weak from hunger and something else… indefinable.
She knelt in the grass, the stalks gently tickling her skin. She closed her eyes, putting the sensation out of her mind and focused on the sounds around her. There was the brush of the grass, the whistle of wind and… she smiled. Just to her left was the sound of an animal… wild hare from its scent.
Stealthily, she circled her prey, waiting patiently. It was over before the rabbit understood it had jumped into a trap. The warrior grabbed the soft neck and sank her teeth into it with relish. She began to feel warmth and strength seeping through her bones until she realized what she was doing.
She flung the hare from her in disgust and tried to retch, but there was nothing in her belly to regurgitate. She lurched to her feet, strong enough now to move towards the light at a steady pace.
It was just daylight when she stumbled into the small encampment. Everyone stared at first, until an old woman approached her with a blanket. “Netonêševehe, ka’êškone? Tosa’e netao’setsêhe’ohtse?”
The warrior’s brow furrowed, not understanding the language. The old woman wrapped the fur around the naked body slowly, gently brushing the wild, dark hair from the planed face. Then she tapped her own chest. “Hotassa,” she stated and pointed to the warrior and arched her eyebrow in mute question.
The blue eyes scanned the small village, noting the well-laid camp and the patiently waiting tribesmen. They didn’t seem to be threatening… merely curious and she decided that she would stay with them as long as they would allow until she could figure out where she was and how to get home.
She looked back at the motherly woman and smiled, eliciting one in response. She jerked a thumb at herself. “Xena,” she answered and let the old woman lead her to a spot by the fire.
Gabrielle packed up her bag and wandered over to find Dite. Surprisingly, she found the goddess curled around a pillow sound asleep. She shook Dite’s shoulder gently.
“Not now, Gab… sleepin’.”
Gabrielle’s eyes widened. She hadn’t known gods and goddesses slept, then realized that Dite had been working extra hard pulling two goddess gigs besides all the help and research she had been doing for Gabrielle herself. Gabrielle pulled the down comforter up around Dite’s shoulders and smile when she burrowed deeper into the pillow. Gabrielle leaned over and kissed Aphrodite on the cheek.
“Goodbye, my friend. Pleasant dreams. Pop in and see me sometime, will ya? I have a feeling I’m gonna need you to keep in touch to keep me from losing my mind.”
Dite didn’t answer, but she sighed softly and smiled.
Gabrielle put a note on the table, then walked to the door and turned one final time. “Thank you, Aphrodite,” she said, before slowly making her way down the hall and out of the Olympian Palace. She figured she had several days’ journey ahead of her before she reached the sea. She was going to go back to the beginning… to the place where all of this had started almost two years before.
It took almost a week before Gabrielle reached the shores nearest the base of Mount Olympus. She heard a hail, calling a name she had not heard since Japa and one she would be glad to forget. She searched the ships anchored off the small port town and found what she was looking for.
“Little Dragon Warrior?”
Gabrielle held up a hand. “Captain, please. My name is Gabrielle.”
Katerina von Lihp’s eyes bulged. That was more words from the Little Dra… Gabrielle… than she had heard during their entire voyage from Japa to Shanghai. The Captain took a good long look at the woman who stood before her in a loose cotton tunic and leggings and saw a renewed sense of hope and purpose in her green eyes.
“Well then, Gabrielle, is there something I can help you with? I did not think to see you here after all this time.”
Gabrielle’s brow furrowed. “Oh? How long as it been?”
It was Katerina’s turn to look confused. “It has been eighteen moons since I saw you in the Southern port. Surely you knew this.”
Gabriele shook her head. “Um, no. No. I’ve been kinda busy. Guess I lost track of time.” Before the Captain could comment, Gabrielle continued. “Are you busy, or can I hire you?”
“Well, we usually do not take passengers, but for you… what did you have in mind?”
“I need to get back to Japa… to Higuchi. I need to go back to where all of this started.”
Katerina regarded her thoughtfully for a long moment before nodding. “That is good. We needed to go back again soon anyway, as I have more trade goods to pick up. When could you be ready to leave?”
“Now is good, hä? Come along. The crew should be about done with their loading. We are leaving with the tide, somewhere after the moon is high.”
“And the fee?”
“Ah, we can discuss that on board the ship. It will be fair, I promise you.”
Gabrielle nodded. Katerina had been nothing but kind and had never once tried to take advantage of her grief. She felt comfortable trusting this rather odd little sea Captain. She had learned the hard way when not to trust and her instincts were pretty reliable. So she followed the Captain to a longboat that rested on the shore.
Most of the crew remembered Gabrielle from their journey together before and gave her a pleasant nod as she boarded. Katerina got her settled in the same small cabin she’d used before and by dawn the next morning, the ship and her crew were sailing down the coastline of Greece.
Things fell quickly into a routine. Every morning, Gabrielle worked with her weapon of choice for the day and she rotated between sais, staff and katana to keep things fresh and interesting. Then she spent time helping do whatever odd little job she could find that didn’t interfere with the regular running of the ship.
She was a little more outgoing, but the crew still strongly respected the boundaries they’d been given the first time and she found she was a little lonely. So at least once a week she went to the galley and cooked, to keep her skills from getting rusty, she said. But it was mostly because Cookie had taken her under her wing and reminded Gabrielle sorely of the grandmother she’d known as a child. The sailors didn’t complain. On the contrary… they looked forward to the days that Gabrielle was in the galley. Extra treats seemed to appear that day.
So time passed slowly; one day pretty much like the next, only differing on the days that they would stop in a port for trading and supplies. Gabrielle learned that Katerina was considered something of an indulgent captain. She made her own rules and set her own schedule and she saw no reason for the crew to suffer sea rations for weeks on end if there were ports along the way that they could stop in to pick up fresh provisions. Only their rush to meet Gabrielle in Greece had gotten them there in only a year’s time before.
So it was nearly six months into the voyage before they reached the bottom of the African continent and Gabrielle was more than grateful for the change in clothing she wore. Her leggings were thick wool and she’d traded in her tunic for a heavy sweater. The seas were getting rougher and the swells were bigger and even with Aphrodite’s ring on, Gabrielle felt a distinct nausea beginning in her belly.
After her exercises, Gabrielle made her apologies to the Captain and went back below to rest. She knew she would do better with the seasickness topside, but at the moment all she wanted to do was close her eyes in the privacy of her own cabin.
Strangely, the motion did not seem to bother her once she lay down and closed her eyes and Gabrielle drifted in a twilight of sleep that was full of memories and images that made no sense to her whatsoever. She didn’t know how long she laid there floating on the edges of sleep, but eventually she felt things around her calm. Gabrielle didn’t open her eyes, not wanting to lose the meditative state she found herself in. It wasn’t until she felt a soft touch in her hair that she slowly blinked her eyes open.
“Hiya, Sweet Pea! How ya doin’?” She continued her stroking and felt Gabrielle relax back into her touch.
“Better, now. I’m glad to see ya though. I’ve missed you.”
“Aw, you’re so sweet, Gab. I’ve totally missed you too. I’m sorry I missed your leaving,” said with just the slightest hint of reproach.
Gabrielle opened her eyes just slightly and gazed into Dite’s blue ones. “Sorry, Dite. You looked so peaceful and I didn’t wanna disturb you. But….”
“But you really wanted to like, get started looking for Big X, huh?” The goddess smiled with understanding and continued stroking Gabrielle’s scalp, grinning indulgently when the bard’s eyes closed again and she relaxed even further into the touch.
“Uh huh,” she agreed. “I wanna find her so we can put all this behind us and get on with our lives.”
Gabrielle’s eyes were closed, so she didn’t see the look that crossed Aphrodite’s face at her words. She felt the hesitation in the stroking though and opened her eyes to catch the grimace that crossed Dite’s face before she schooled her features into a smile. Gabrielle sat up on an elbow, bringing her almost nose to nose with the goddess. Aphrodite stood up to pace the small cabin.
“Aphrodite?” Gabrielle’s voice was almost growly in accusation.
“Ya know, Cutie, I’ve been totally busy since you left… lots of bitchin’ love biz, ya know? Keepin’ up with the Greeks and the Romans is enough to like, soooo wear out a love goddess doin’ double duty. Anyway,” Dite hurried on, seeing Gabrielle was getting a little impatient. “In what little free time I’ve had, I’ve been looking for that radical warrior of yours.” Aphrodite paused and painted on a bright smile. “I have good news and bad news.”
Gabrielle flopped back on the bed and covered her eyes with her linked hands and groaned. “I’m not gonna like this, am I?” She sighed. “Give me the bad news.”
“Well, sweetie, the bad news is I’m still looking for exactly *where* Xena is. I’m just not totally sure where or when where is yet exactly. See, I’ve been all over the known world on the world wide god web looking for her and I personally went back to Japa, the Norselands and Egypt to speak to the gods there. I know she’s not there because we searched through their webs too. I will be soooo totally glad when we get everything tied together between us, but I think that’s gonna be a little while longer coming.”
“Wait, wait, wait!” Gabrielle sat up waving her hands. “I’m sure the intricacies of your god web thing are fascinating and any other time I’d be glad to discuss it in detail. But right now, I wanna go back *just* a little bit.”
“The good news isn’t gonna get me outta this, huh?”
“Well, yeah! We know that Xena’s nowhere in the known world, so you really don’t have to go back to Japa. I know that place has some radically rotten memories for you.”
Gabrielle scraped her nails through her hair in complete exasperation before scrubbing her face and sighing. “Aphrodite, if Xena is nowhere to be found in the known world, then where is she?”
Dite stamped her own feet in vexation. “I don’t know!” She ran her hands through her own hair and made it stand up on end. “I’ve never seen anywhere like this and it was only a glimpse!”
“Then how do you know that it’s nowhere in the known world?”
“Because it was between fifteen hundred and two thousand years into the future!!” Dite shouted, then slapped a hand over her mouth as what she said registered and Gabrielle collapsed onto the bed.
“What???” Gabrielle asked in a strangled whisper.
Dite sat down next to Gabrielle and took her hands, pulling her into a reluctant hug. For a few minutes nothing was said between them as Aphrodite concentrated on calming Gabrielle’s racing pulse. Gently she rubbed the bard’s back, willing her to relax. Finally and quite firmly, Gabrielle pulled back, though she held on to Dite’s hands.
“You’re telling me Xena is somewhere in the future and I’m gonna have to wait between fifteen hundred and two thousand years before I can even TRY to find her??”
“Uh huh. That was the best I could narrow it down. I….”
Gabrielle took her hands out of Aphrodite’s grasp and stood up to pace. The goddess watched patiently as Gabrielle paced the three steps between the wall and the door, waving her hands and talking to herself. Eventually, she seemed to come to a conclusion and dropped back down next to Aphrodite.
She waved her hands, though Dite was sitting quietly with a bemused look on her face. “Okay, look. I don’t wanna know how you figured this out right now. I’m honestly not sure my brain could handle the overload right now. But you’re sure it was so far away??”
Dite shrugged. “Yeah. I don’t know how she got there yet, or even where there *is*. But I’m fairly certain about the time frame.”
“C’mon, Gab, cut me a little slack here, will ya? I’m working with a lot of unknowns. I know this is hard, but I’m doin’ the best I can here!”
“I’m sorry Aphrodite. It’s just….”
“I know, babe, I know!” Dite agreed, embracing the bard in a hug. “I’ll keep looking, but there’s nothing I can do to make time go by faster.”
“I don’t suppose you could send me forward fifteen hundred years?” Gabrielle asked half-jokingly.
“Babe, even if I knew exactly when and where she was I couldn’t send you there. When Herc crushed the Cronos stone, he took our ability to cross timelines. We have to live through time like everybody else. I’m sorry.”
Gabrielle squeezed Aphrodite before pulling back and looking up into her eyes. “It’s all right, Dite. I didn’t figure you could, or you probably already would have. It was worth a shot, though. I had to ask.”
“I know you did, Cutie. You wouldn’t be you if you didn’t try everything you could to get to her.”
They sat down on the bed, content for a while to absorb the comfort they offered one another. Finally Gabrielle lifted her head from Aphrodite’s shoulder.
“So now I have to figure out what I’m gonna do for the next fifteen hundred years.”
“Well, maybe I can help with that a little, at least to start,” Dite answered, waiting for Gabrielle to look at her. When she was sure she had Gabrielle’s undivided attention, she asked, “Do you think you could take the Amazons to a new home?”
Gabrielle quirked an eyebrow and waited.
“Diana… Artemis asked me to keep an eye on them and I have been as much as I could. But it’s hard with everything else I have goin’ on, ya know? And they are totally being screwed over. They are being pushed out of what little land they have left and I thought maybe you’d be willing to help them find a new home.”
Gabrielle nodded. “Seems like the least I can do for them. Do you have a place in mind?”
Aphrodite popped a map in and put in on the bed. “Well, I was thinking an island, maybe here,” pointing to an area that had several islands clustered together and was reasonably close to India. “They’d have a way better chance of keeping the Nation alive if there are men relatively close to them without necessarily being in the same space.”
Gabrielle looked at the map closely. “That might work. In fact, it should do nicely. Tell ya what, next port we get to, I’ll get off and start back to Greece.”
“Aphrodite, it’s gonna take a while to get all the remnants together and I can’t just go popping in and out of places. People will start to notice and if I’ve gotta survive for two thousand years, I need to keep as low a profile as I can.”
Aphrodite gave her the barest hint of a pout.
Gabrielle relented just slightly. “Tell ya what. I’ll write up a notice and give you a list of all the places it needs to be posted. If you could make sure that gets done, it would be a tremendous help.”
Dite clapped her hands and bounced on the balls of her feet. “I can do that!”
“Good. Thank you! Then hopefully most of them will be at the meeting place by the time I arrive and I can leave some cryptic instructions for any stragglers or women who may want to join the Nation later.”
“Radical idea… just bitchin’, babe! Lemme go and I’ll be back to get that stuff from you when you’re done, ‘kay? Just call me!”
“I will, Aphrodite. Thanks for coming to see me.”
“Oh, hon… you can look for me to pop in and out of your life regularly from now on. We gotta stick together, you and me. Thanks for helping me out, babe! You ROCK!”
The goddess disappeared with her usually fanfare, leaving behind a scattering of fresh rose petals. An immediate knock on the door precluded any legitimate thought and Gabrielle wasn’t quite surprised to see Captain Lihp standing in front of her.
“Are you all right, Gabrielle? The first mate told me he thought he heard you talking to yourself and I know the weather was making things difficult for you.”
“I’m fine, Captain, but I find that I must leave the ship at our next stop. I will pay you for the entire voyage,” Gabrielle hastened to explain, “but I suddenly remembered something I left undone and I have to get back and take care of it as soon as possible.”
“No, Captain, please. This is your business and I know you have contracts with merchants aside from our arrangement. I won’t allow you to lose time or business on my account. Especially since if I had been thinking when I set this up, I would have remembered this to start with.”
“It’s a long way back to Greece, Little Dragon. Are you sure….”
“Yes, Captain, I am, but thank you for your concern. I appreciate it.”
“Well, you have been a good passenger and a contributing member of this crew. We will all miss you greatly vhen you leave.”
“Thank you, Captain, for all you and your crew have done. I will always be grateful.” Gabrielle extended her hand and Katerina accepted it gracefully.
“We should be reaching our next port in two days. I will make sure you are well set for your journey home before we leave the port.”
“I do, hä? I made a promise and Katerina von Lihp never breaks a promise if it is possible to keep it.”
“I have to tell you, Captain… I have probably enjoyed my time on your ship better than any other I have ever spent time aboard.”
“Not a sailor, then, hmm?” said with just a hint of a teasing grin. “Well, I thank you. I am proud of my ship and crew. She’s a fine craft and they are good people.”
“Yeah, they are. And so are you.”
Katerina blushed slightly. “Will you be topside shortly, or should I have your dinner sent here?”
“I’ll come up. I understand Schmidt is singing tonight.”
“Yes, he is. We will expect you shortly then, hä?”
“Yep, just left me clean up a bit and I’ll be there.”
“Good! Good! Meet you on deck then.”
Gabrielle closed the door behind the effusive captain and sat down on the bed. She ran her hands through her hair and looked at the ceiling, though her focus was on something internal only she could see.
“Two thousand years!! Oh Xena, how am I ever gonna survive this? What am I gonna do now?”
The first few hours in Xena’s new life were spent in mostly silence. She spent her time observing and listening to everything that was going on around her and she had come to the definite conclusion that Greece was a very long way away. The last coherent memory she had before her arrival was lying on their shared furs looking at the stars with Gabrielle and after that…. She was at a loss to know where she was or how she’d come to be there.
Hotassa was the first wife of the tribal medicine man and she had taken it upon herself to adopt Xena. The shaman didn’t mind; his first-born son had indicated an interest in the warrior and it was good for Xena that Hotassa taught her the ways of the tribe.
After the discussion and argument with the tribal elders were over, Hotassa took Xena to the spring to clean herself up and she brought along with her the dress of a native woman. Xena bathed, then looked at the dress with disdain. It was pretty enough and the beadwork on it was nice, but it was entirely impractical for a warrior. She shook her head no.
“Heehe’e!” Hotassa answered vehemently. “He’eo’o hoestôtse.”
Xena made no move to take the dress from Hotassa’s hand and the older woman thrust it out to her again. “He’eo’o hoestôtse.”
“No!” Xena answered with equal defiance. “I want that!”
Xena spun the older woman toward the village and pointed at one of the young warriors who was strutting around in long pants and a breechcloth.
Hotassa shook her head. “Hova’âhane!” she exclaimed. “Notaxe nêhpêso’hestôtse… he’eo’o hoestôtse.”
“Look, Hotassa. I am a warrior and this,” taking the garment and shaking it at the older woman, “won’t work for me. I want that!”
The two women stood staring at one another for long moments before Hotassa took the dress and threw it to the ground prior to stomping off.
Xena wrapped the blanket more tightly around her and picked up the dress. Then she wandered back to the village.
“Ah, this’ll do nicely,” she muttered to herself, slipping the blade from its sheath without a sound. Then she wrapped the blanket more firmly around her and began patiently cutting seams. She started gathering a curious crowd, but patently ignored them as she continued to work. Hotassa pushed her way through the group of women and children, noting that the men were equally interested but trying to put on an indifferent front.
“I need a needle and some gut. You know,” seeing the confusion in Hotassa’s eyes. She made motions with her hands. “For sewing.”
Hotassa was intrigued and understanding the request by the motions Xena made, retrieved her sewing basket from her tent. Then she watched patiently as Xena reformed the garment into something… different.
Xena sat there until late afternoon, noting idly that all activity in the camp seemed to have stopped waiting for her to unveil her work. Finally satisfied, she held the two piece garment for her inspection. Pleased with what she saw, Xena dropped the blanket and slipped into her new clothing.
The bottom was similar to a breechcloth, except there were short pants underneath. Her top was a sleeveless one-piece that barely reached the top of her breechcloth. Xena smiled to realize that her new outfit highly resembled some of the clothes Gabrielle had worn. Without warning, her breath caught and she concentrated on forcing air in and out of her lungs. The place in her heart that had always been Gabrielle was empty and barren.
Hearing her name falling awkwardly from unfamiliar lips made Xena smile sadly. It was a stark reminder of just what she was missing.
“Zee-nah? Nepevomohtâhehe?” Hotassa put a hand on Xena’s arm and even though Xena couldn’t understand the language, the questioning the older woman’s eyes was unmistakable. She smiled shakily and patted the hand on her arm.
“I’m all right, Hotassa. As right as I can be right now, anyway,” she mumbled to herself.
Hotassa smiled and looked back to where the braves and warriors were lurking and waved at her son. The man stepped forward and made his way through the crowd.
“Hetsêheohe, Kya Nenaasêstse!”
The young shaman stepped forward and started touching Xena’s face and she knocked his hands away. He smiled and muttered something she didn’t understand, running his fingers down her arms. This time she shrugged him off and pushed him bodily from her.
“Who in Tartarus do you think you are???”
Kya growled and lunged at her and she side-stepped and kicked him in the ass before turning and smiling viciously at him. She waggled her fingers at him.
“C’mon, big boy. Ya wanna play?”
He reached for her and this time she simply jabbed and watched as he fell to his knees, gasping for breath.
“I’ve just cut off the flow of blood to your brain. Maybe when I restart it, it’ll flow well enough for you to figure things out.”
His nose started bleeding and she jabbed again, pulling back to punch him senseless. She was startled when she found her hand caught by the elder shaman.
“Hova’âhane,” he said, shaking his head. “Eneoestse!”
The older man motioned to his son and sent him scurrying off to another tent. Then the man turned her over to Hotassa and walked back to the fire he had been seated at. Hotassa took Xena by the arm and led her to the small tent that had been prepared for her next to her own.
Xena looked around the small space noting the hole in the top and the fire pit that was on the ground beneath it. Hotassa was gesturing around and Xena saw except that for a few furs the place was empty. She turned and exited the dwelling, Hotassa hot on her heels.
The older woman grabbed her arm and it was by sheer will that Xena did not knock her into next week. Instead she whirled around with fire in her eyes and Hotassa involuntarily took a step back. Xena consciously took herself in hand, reminding herself that it was not this woman’s fault she felt so completely off balance and that so far, Hotassa had been nothing but a friend.
She smiled and held up her hands in supplication. “Sorry,” knowing the woman wouldn’t understand the words, but hoping the gestures would convey her thoughts. Xena ran her hands through her hair in frustration. She could feel a burning start in her gut and it made her uneasy on top of everything else. She signed to Hotassa as best as she could, but the older woman shook her head in non-understanding.
Finally, Xena took her hand and led her back into the small dwelling, motioning to the empty fire pit and the furs. Hotassa nodded with comprehension and led Xena out and gesticulated towards the open prairie. Xena returned the look with a furrowed brow.
Hotassa snatched up a basket from beside her own fire and took Xena’s hand in her own, leading her out behind the encampment into the open field. They went a short distance, until they were out some ways and Hotassa began looking at the ground carefully. Without warning, she bent and retrieved something triumphantly and placed it in the basket.
Xena took a closer look then drew her head back in surprised disgust. “Oh, you have got to be kidding me. You want me to use animal dung for fire?”
“Ho’esta, heehe’e!” Hotassa answered emphatically, as though she understood Xena’s words. She thrust the basket into Xena’s hands. Then she turned and went back to the camp.
Xena stood stock still for a long moment, closing her eyes and letting the breeze blow across her face. Oh, Gabrielle… what am I supposed to do now? Where am I and what happened to us? To you? I can’t feel you and yet you were alive in my arms just… oh gods…. Her thoughts trailed off and she sank to her knees in agony. The feeling of her soul sundering was overwhelming and Xena let it wash over her in waves.
She wasn’t aware of the passage of time as she sat in shocked silence grieving. But it was totally dark when she came to herself again and she was covered with the blanket Hotassa had offered her… was it only that morning? and a bowl of slightly warm stew sat beside her.
The food beside her reminded her of another hunger and without recognizing her intentions, she shed the blanket and stealthily crept through the grass. The groundhog was dead and drained when she realized what had happened. Xena took off running, hoping to outrun the hounds of hell that suddenly seemed to be on her tail. Life made no sense anymore and she’d lost her balance.
When daybreak came, her resolve was set. She would find out what god was playing with her life and figure out what life or afterlife they had deposited her into. Then whatever it took, she would find her way back to Gabrielle.
Xena came back into the encampment disheveled and silent. She immediately went into her small tent, surprised to see her blanket folded neatly on the furs, small pile of buffalo chips in her fire pit and another bowl of warm stew and a waterskin nearby. She smiled sadly, recognizing that she’d found a friend in this place.
She took up the bowl first and ate every morsel, her body understanding it needed both forms of food to survive and survival was paramount until she figured this puzzle out. She guzzled the water from the skin, flinching slightly at its odd taste, then proceeding to drink the skin dry.
Xena retrieved her bowl, blanket and skin and quickly made her way out of her dwelling and down to the water’s edge. She rechecked the water carefully, then refilled the skin and laid it to one side. She rinsed her bowl and utensil, the stripped out of her clothes and rinsed the night’s grime from her body, feeling herself settle as she did so. She washed as well as she could manage without soap, then rinsed her leathers and wrapped up in the blanket before making her way back to the camp.
Xena drew a few stares, but not as many as one would imagine, as a good portion of the tribe wasn’t present. She laid her clothes out to dry and went next door to Hotassa’s home, bowl in hand.
She wasn’t sure if Hotassa was home so she cleared her throat and called softly, “Hotassa?” Xena waited patiently and heard stirrings from inside. Hotassa stuck her head out, shaking her head when Xena offered the bowl back to her.
“Zee-nah’s,” she said. Xena inclined her head in acceptance. Hotassa looked at her with a raised eyebrow, indicating her state of undress. Xena simply pointed to the grass where her clothing lay drying and Hotassa nodded in understanding.
Xena bit her lip, thinking about how to convey her next question. “Hotassa, I need a scroll, ink and quill,” mimicking her words with her hands. Hotassa stared at her dumbly and Xena blew out a breath of frustration, her respect for Gabrielle’s communication skills suddenly skyrocketing. She looked around, spotting a basket full of craft supplies and snatched up a feather and a pot of paint. Xena dipped the end of the quill into the container of black paint. Then she grabbed an odd piece of hide and made several small marks.
“Can I keep these?” she asked, holding the things to her breast in a sign of ownership. Hotassa, though not understanding the words, recognized the gesture and nodded her head in agreement, folding her hands over Xena’s.
“Thank you,” Xena said softly, then went back to sit in front of her small tent and began to write in earnest.
Things I need to know
1. Am I alive
a. If so, where am I
b. If not, what afterlife is this
2. Is Gabrielle alive
a. If so, why can’t I sense her
b. If not, where is she and how did she die
3. How did I get here
a. Gods with the ability to get me to wherever here is
5. Michael’s god
b. Gods with the desire to get me to wherever here is
1. Ares – just because
2. Aphrodite – because of something that happened to Gabrielle?
3. Odin – old grudge
4. Michael’s god – because of Lucifer?
c. A third party? Someone like Alti with something to gain from my separation from Gabrielle?
4. Can I get home
Xena sat rereading her questions and points, pinching her bottom lip between her finger and thumb as she thought. She was heedless of the paint she was spreading on her face and didn’t even realize that she resembled Gabrielle when she did the same thing.
After a few moments she took up her writing again.
Things I am fairly confident about
1. This is a new place – life or afterlife
2. I was manipulated to get here
3. At least part of the answer should be nearby
She reread her work one final time, then laid it aside, satisfied with her conclusions so far. There was still room to add questions, points or facts as the came to light. For now, she had other work to do.
Xena placed the hide in her tent, then reached out and snagged her dry clothes from the grasses where the lay. She dressed and picked up the paint, walking back to Hotassa’s. Hotassa saw her coming and frowned at the pot of paint Xena held out to her.
“Hova’âhane. Zee-nah’s,” she said, shaking her head and patting the warrior’s chest lightly. “Zee-nah’s.”
Xena nodded her acceptance. Then she pointed to the basket Hotassa had used the day before and motioned to the vast prairie with an inquiring look on her face. Hotassa smiled and nodded her approval and Xena took the basket and made her way to the open fields.
Xena made several trips back and forth, filling the basket and emptying it into a small but ever-growing pile between her tent and Hotassa’s. Finally, Hotassa’s husband, the elder medicine man, stepped in front of her and held up his hand. Her first reaction was to grab it and twist, but she thought about it when he spoke.
“Eneoestse,” said kindly with a smile, indicating the now large pile of chips. “Epeva’e. Nea’eše.”
Xena nodded and wiped an arm across her brow in an attempt to stop the sweat from rolling into her eyes. She placed the basket back at the side of the teepee where she’d found it and went to her own dwelling and retrieved her waterskin.
She sat down to rest a moment, drinking the water as quickly as she dared. She grimaced when a bowl of thick, unidentifiable yellow substance was thrust under her nose. Xena hesitantly took it from a smiling Hotassa with a murmured, “Thank you.”
It was odd and the texture was disconcerting, but she found the mixture sweetly palatable and very filling. The heat and fullness of her belly, combined with the lack of rest and the emotional draining she’d been through in the very short time she’d been in the village combined to make Xena dreadfully tired. Try as she might, she couldn’t seem to keep her eyes open and the last thing she remembered was Hotassa leading her into her tent and the scent of freshly cut grass before her mind shut down in exhausted slumber.
It was pre-dawn when Xena’s eyes opened again and she blinked in confusion trying to remember where she was that everything was so unfamiliar. Reality washed over her and she closed her eyes until it passed knowing that she still had many unanswered questions and no Gabrielle.
Her first order of business was survival, however and despite Hotassa’s kindnesses, Xena knew there were many things she needed to do before she could start on her quest for answers.
So for the next several days, Xena learned the ways of the tribe. She learned to weave baskets to collect food and chips in. She caught fish and amazed the women and children with her bare-handed method. Hotassa took pity on her after her first meal fiasco and always made sure to prepare enough to share with Xena at her own fire. Xena in turn made sure to provide whatever food and chips she was allowed.
It had been made clear to her very early that in this society, men and women had separate functions. And women did not function in the role of hunter or warrior. So Xena hunted alone, providing the food for her own meals and the blood she seemed to crave. She actually preferred it that way. It kept there from being too many questions.
Hotassa gave her the knife she’d used in her sewing, but otherwise, Xena crafted all the tools and weapons she needed. Soon, she had skins and furs of her own, a longbow and arrows, several other knives and a staff. Daily she took the staff out for exercise and training and though the people thought it odd that she walked with a stick, no one questioned her right to do so. She had made it clear through words and gestures that she preferred to be left alone and though it angered some, they all respected her wishes. Having seen what she’d done to Kya, no one challenged her.
She was still excluded from warrior activity, though and it was making her short-tempered and hostile. The blood she consumed could not completely satisfy the burning she felt. So she was a part pf the tribe and yet remained separate from it as well.
The tribe slowly moved around, following the buffalo as they grazed their way across the plains. A month passed before Xena realized it and she’d made no progress in finding answers to her questions. Day to day existence took up so much time and trying to get information while she was still learning to communicate with these people was a difficult prospect at best.
The men had formed a war party and the women were left to wait for the outcome of a battle their warriors had little hope to win. Xena took the time to hone her staff skills and several of the women watching her asked for instruction.
She agreed reluctantly, remembering the times that Gabrielle had asked her for tutoring in one martial skill or another. She remembered with particular wistfulness Gabrielle’s introduction to her staff and the Amazons. It had been the beginning of their Amazon Princess/Warrior Princess/Amazon Queen discussions.
The women went into the scrub area looking for limbs long enough to suffice and were unable to find anything comparable to their needs. Frustrated, they came back to the encampment. Xena noted their disgruntled faces and placed her staff in her tent and instead motioned for them to join her.
The women did so hesitantly and Xena began taking them through the meditative Chi exercises she and Gabrielle had practiced together. If she closed her eyes, she could still see the picture of serenity on Gabrielle’s face as the moves flowed through and around her. Xena bit her lip, as the pain had not lessened with the passage of time; it had only increased.
The women were awkward at first, moving in a way that was unfamiliar to them at first and then with more beauty as their natural gracefulness came to the fore.
After a bit, with sweat trailing down their faces but smiling happily at their new skill, they stopped by mutual consent. This was something they would enjoy doing and Xena had finally found a contribution to the community that made both parties happy.
That evening, Xena went hunting. She had been too long without blood and the burning was making her mad with rage. She went out resolved to drain the first living thing that crossed her path.
Xena had long since determined that she was somehow suffering from the Bacchae burning, but was at a loss to explain why or how it happened. She remembered clearly the festival when Gabrielle had become bacchae… when she had shared the burning for the first time and the feeling had been… orgasmic.
It had been very brief, but Xena remembered it as clearly now as when it had first happened. It had been the first time either of them had let themselves imagine other possibilities between them, but it hadn’t been the last.
And once they’d become lovers…
Xena shook her head, trying to clear it. This train of thought made the hunger worse and the pain of the loss of Gabrielle in her life more acute. Instead, she turned her focus to the hunt, hoping to sate the burning for at least a little while.
The tribe’s wanderings had brought them within walking distance of some scrubland… not enough to supply wood for their fires or provide the women with suitable staffs, but plenty to give shelter to some of the wildlife in the area.
The buffalo tended to avoid the area as it was home to several predators that hunted them, but Xena felt the need for a fight and headed out to find one.
She hadn’t gone far when her nose picked up several scents and she stood still and allowed herself to separate them into the animals to which they belonged.
At that moment, a movement in the grass caused Xena to turn and jump, catching her prey easily. She lifted it up, feeling her incisors grow to meet her need when her attention was caught by the greenest eyes she had ever seen.
Xena stopped short, noting that in the moonlight the fox in her hand had red-gold hair that prompted her memories of a much younger Gabrielle. She cursed her mind for allowing her to continually be reminded of Gabrielle in everything around her.
She still was unable to feel Gabrielle and being reminded of her constantly was painful in the extreme, especially in light of the fact that she’d been unable to make any progress in her inquiries. It was difficult and Xena had long since had anything as frustratingly difficult as this particular challenge was proving to be.
Xena sat down, gently stroking the fur of the fox who for reasons unknown had curled up contentedly in her arms. She looked down at the small, furry bundle and unexpectedly, the fox returned the look with understanding.
“You remind me of someone, you know. Someone I love very much. There is no way I can look into those eyes, her eyes and inflict death on you, even for my own need.”
The fox snuggled down into Xena’s lap and a dark eyebrow rose into an equally dark hairline.
“Oh, please. Make yourself at home.”
She lifted the fox up and looked it in the eye and swore for an instant she saw Gabrielle’s soul looking back at her. Xena nearly dropped the animal and the fox instinctively dug its claws into Xena’s hands. Her hiss of pain was covered by a much louder hiss and that sound sent a skitter up Xena’s spine.
It had been a while, but Xena easily recognized the predator that now circled behind her. She tried to ease the fox out of her grasp as she stood, but the animal would have none of it. Instead, the fox gazed at Xena confidently, then scrambled down and took up a position of sentinel, sitting up proud and tall as the panther approached.
Xena watched, fascinated. She had never seen behavior like this between a hunter and its prey and yet it subtly reminded her of… something… familiar.
The panther continued to circle and Xena held herself in check, keeping a very close eye on the fox. The small animal showed no fear, but kept its green eyes focused on the cat that now paced back and forth in front of them.
The panther growled, yet the fox merely tilted its head in questioning. Nearer and nearer the cat paced, until the fox reached out a paw and laid it on the panther’s muzzle.
Xena froze, her hunger forgotten as she watched the tableau unfold before her eyes. Breathing became optional as she watched the panther lower its head and gently nuzzle its face into the fox’s neck. The fox laid its nose on the cat’s momentarily and then they both looked back at Xena.
Xena sat down as two pairs of eyes, one blue and one green, gazed back at her. The familiarity of them was astonishing and she watched in continued disbelief as the fox settled between the panther’s forepaws and the cat wrapped itself protectively around its… mate?
“Oh Xena,” she said aloud to herself as she reclined back in the grass to look at the stars. “I think madness or bloodlust or some really bad mushrooms have finally caught up with you, ’cause you are losing it. Panthers and foxes don’t mate. There are laws in nature and that goes against most of them.” She rubbed her eyes and continued looking at the stars. “I think you are just tired and the pain of missing Gabrielle constantly has made you see things.”
Xena sat up, keeping her eyes closed with her hands pressed against her lids. “Now, go find you something to eat before what little of the mind you seem to have left takes a hike.”
She opened her eyes, fully expecting to be alone. The panther and the fox remained, though now they both seemed to be to be keeping sentinel over her. She rolled her eyes heavenward and murmured, “Gods, don’t let me lose my mind before I figure a way out of this riddle and back to Gabrielle.”
Then she collected her bow and headed out toward the prairie, her silent guards padding along beside her.
Gabrielle stood at the rail of the passenger ship, enjoying the wind as it teased her long hair loose from its pins. She appreciated the fresh sea air, though her heavy clothing tended to keep most of the breeze from her body. Gabrielle disdained modern clothing, but there were times, like now, when she had to bend to the fashion of the moment to blend in with the rest of polite society.
She had long since outgrown seasickness. It was a fact she was devoutly grateful for, especially since sea travel was the only way for her to cross from the old world to the new.
The year was 1835 and the wealth Gabrielle had accumulated over the centuries meant she was able to travel from Southampton to Halifax in relative comfort. She smiled in retrospect, remembering the many times she and Xena had traveled much rougher. A familiar pang squeezed her heart and she held her breath until it passed.
It’s been more than seventeen hundred years, Xena and in some ways I still hurt as much today as I did that day in Japan. Always there is an ache in my heart and an empty place in my soul that is waiting for you to fill it again. If not for the fact that I continue to feel your presence, I would surely have gone mad by now… not that I haven’t been close to that a time or two in my travels.
Gabrielle’s smile became bittersweet and she turned to her journal. It was comprised of several volumes of thick, leather-bound notebooks that she carried with her. They had become quite cumbersome over the centuries, but unlike the scrolls that she and Xena had deposited in various hiding places in the ancient world, she couldn’t bear to be separated from her journals. Sometimes, they seemed to be the only link she had between her realities and the best way she had of maintaining her sense of self.
The journal she held in her hand was of her earliest travels and she signaled for a chair to be brought out. Money had enabled her to hire the ship as a private charter and she took advantage of that fact only rarely. In the early mornings, she could be found practicing with weapons the crew had never imagined and they watched enviously her strength and sheer grace honed from centuries of practice.
Otherwise she followed the traditions of society and if the crew found her slightly eccentric, it made little difference to her.
The third mate ran back with her chair, while several of the other sailors scurried around to make her comfortable. Gabrielle couldn’t help the smile that crossed her face inwardly, though she was careful not to let it show outwardly. These boys are such babies, she thought, remembering easily she had been the same way when she’d first stepped into Xena’s life.
There had been ample opportunities for relationships, but nothing could compare with what she’d had with Xena and what Dite had promised she would share again. So she’d gone through life alone, but not lonely, because she attracted people to her. But she’d never allowed anyone to get too close and she’d watched as people got older and younger at the same time.
She shook her head to clear the maudlin thoughts and sat down with a sigh. Gabrielle opened her journal and began to read, letting her words to Xena wash over her and take her back to a place long gone and almost forgotten.
Dear Xena…. (it read)
I’m taking the Amazons away to a new home. Greece has become unbearable for them and Dite asked me to. So, I’m going to lead them to an island we’ve found and help them get settled. I was never the kind of Queen they needed, but the time has come for me to lead.
It had taken Gabrielle several moons of walking before the land started taking on the familiarity of home. And even then, it was so changed from what she remembered; what she had known when she and Xena had traveled together.
Romans were everywhere and the streets were crowded. Places that she had known as forest or wilderness now all had the earmarks of civilization. People were crowded into small spaces and their houses would be considered hovels at best. The smell was something beyond comprehension and Gabrielle was suddenly less than thrilled with the enhanced senses immortality had given her.
People tended to give her the odd second glance simply because she looked so different than everyone around her. Gabrielle carried herself with poise and authority and her musculature was strong and firm while those around her tended to be round and soft. And it didn’t take long for word to spread among the criminal element that she was one that needed to be avoided. Their kind tended to disappear when they messed with her.
Gradually, Gabrielle made her way to Amazon territory and was surprised by what she found there. The lack of territory was her first shock. She had gone into the woods quite a ways farther then she expected to before she was challenged. When the sentries realized who she was, they let her pass without comment, but also without escort. It was apparent by their demeanor that there was a lot of confusion and no one knew exactly what position Gabrielle held.
When she stepped foot into the village, though, Gabrielle stopped dead at the chaos that enveloped her. Amazons were everywhere, doing all manner of sundry things, but no one seemed to be in charge.
Gabrielle stood still watching the bedlam, waiting to be noticed. A fight broke out between two women and she calmly inserted herself between them, slowly drawing the attention of everyone in the encampment. Subtly, the atmosphere changed and with only a look and a few well-placed words, order began to come from chaos.
Amazons were represented from all over… from several tribes Gabrielle recognized and from quite a few she didn’t. Her first efforts involved integrating the many tribes into a single cohesive unit. The tribes had to be one nation before they could move.
Daily more women arrived in the village and Varia and Cyane stepped aside willingly to allow Gabrielle to assume command of the Nation. For herself, Gabrielle immersed herself in the details of preparing the Nation for movement.
Gradually, preparations were made, provisions were laid in and arrangements were completed for travel. All told, it took Gabrielle fourteen moons to have the Amazons travel ready, but when spring returned to Greece, the Nation headed out towards a new destiny.
It took a great deal of time, Gabrielle thought, though she knew in the back of her mind that that was completely relative for her. Still, with the amount of people and supplies they were moving, their progress was good.
She had split the Nation into smaller traveling parties, sending each of them in slightly different directions to make them less of a target. It took a little longer for everyone to arrive, but they did so safely and Gabrielle sighed with relief when they were finally boarding the ships she had secured for their voyage.
Gabrielle had them board in the night. They had managed to avoid trouble for the most part and she wanted to keep it that way until they left.
Finally, the ships were loading and as the sun rose, they slowly eased out of port. Gabrielle had found female crews, some of them already Amazon, who were willing to make the journey with them. With slight trepidation, she stood on the aft deck, watching the land retreat behind them. Things had fallen into place for the Nation remarkably well considering the magnitude of the task and Gabrielle stood reflecting on their progress and the things they still had to do.
Gabrielle almost jumped when Aphrodite appeared beside her in Amazon leathers, but she managed to hold herself in check. She glanced at the goddess with a look of fond exasperation.
“Dite, are you trying to scare me to death?”
“Huh? You’re an immortal, babe, remember? Not like you can die.”
The words, though spoken in a teasing tone, cut deeply and Gabrielle was again forcibly reminded of her solitary status. Dite shivered at the pain that crossed her friend’s face and opened her mouth to apologize, but was cut off by Gabrielle.
“That’s true. What can I do for you?”
Dite turned away from the receding shore and instead turned her attention to the bustling activity on the deck. It was all very orderly and she couldn’t help but admire the difference in the Nation since Gabrielle had taken charge of them.
“Nothing. I just came to see how things were going. You have been so massively busy and so have I that we’ve had like, no time for girl talk. I’ve missed ya, babe!”
Gabrielle slipped her arms around Dite’s waist in an unexpected embrace and the goddess returned the hug fervently. She understood all too well the loneliness that Gabrielle lived with and was happy to provide any measure of comfort she could.
“I’ve missed you too, Dite. There are days…. Can I do this for two thousand years without completely losing my mind?”
Dite held her, gently rubbing her back until she felt Gabrielle relax against her. She had a feeling this might be necessary from time to time and was determined to be there for Gabrielle to help her weather the rough bits that were in store for her.
“You’re a strong person, Gab. One of the strongest I’ve ever had the privilege to know… or call friend.” Dite paused, thinking of the millennia she’d been alive and knowing how hard that continued existence could be even for a god. “I think,” she bit her lip then continued. “I totally think you can do this. You know what the payoff is gonna be, babe and I think for that reason alone your mind will hang in there. Besides, imagine the bodacious stories you will have to tell Xena when you finally like, catch up to her.”
Dite felt Gabrielle chuckle and breathed a sigh of relief. Gabrielle was in a hard place and would be for the next quite a few centuries. But as long as she maintained her humor and her zest for life, she’d be all right.
Dite took Gabrielle’s face in her hands, wanting to be sure she had the bard’s complete attention for what she had to say next. “I want you to listen now and I want you to understand what I’m saying, ‘kay?” Aphrodite held Gabrielle’s gaze and Gabrielle read the serious intent behind the words that were being spoken. She nodded her understanding and Dite continued.
“Whenever… WHENEVER it feels like it’s getting to be too much for you… whenever you feel overwhelmed to the point of absolutely exploding or losing your mind, you call me. You call me and I’ll take you back to Olympus for a while.”
Gabrielle’s forehead creased and Dite hurried on. “You can call me anytime you need me, or just want to talk, Gab and I’ll be here as soon as I can. But I can’t risk taking you to Olympus too often for fear of Ares finding out. He doesn’t know you and Xena are immortals and I don’t see a reason to enlighten him right now.”
“How will you know the difference?” came the whispered question.
“I’ll know. You just trust me on that.”
“I can do that.”
“Good. And you can totally count on me to pop up from time to time on my own too, ‘kay? I so need a friend sometimes.”
Gabrielle smiled. “Good, cause I’d hate to have to climb Olympus to kick your butt or something.”
Dite’s hands went to her hips. “Girlfriend, you are a total troublemaker, ya know that?” She put her arm around Gabrielle’s neck and proceeded to give her a noogie. “Good thing I love ya.”
Gabrielle’s first instinct was to fight, but instead she decided to tickle. Dite squealed, not expecting that reaction.
“Yeah, it is,” Gabrielle agreed when Dite’s hold loosened. “I love ya back.”
“Cool! Now that we’ve got the serious stuff out of the way, why don’t you show me around this gnarly set-up? Looks like you’ve done good by these babes.”
Aphrodite took Gabrielle by the arm and began to slowly walk across the deck. No one paid them much mind; they had grown used to Gabrielle wandering through them talking to herself.
“I’ve tried to. They can be the most ornery, obstinate bunch, but they deserve the best I can do for them… both for your sake and theirs. C’mon, I’ll show you around.”
They moved below decks and Dite was even more impressed with the system Gabrielle had set up. Women moved everywhere with quiet efficiency and all the space was economically used.
“Is it like this on all the ships?” There were seven ships in the convoy that was slowly making its way out of the Ionian Sea. It had been a longer land trek for them, but worth it, as far as Gabrielle was concerned.
“Um hmm,” Gabrielle nodded as they made their way back to the main deck. “Pretty much. Each of the ships has a designated leader who serves as my regent and is responsible for handling her group. They will handle anything that comes up. Only if they can’t settle things will it come to me.”
“Radically cool, babe! You rock!”
Gabrielle chuckled. Dite’s enthusiasm was heartening. “Well, that remains to be seen. We’ve only just left port, ya know.”
“Trust me, sweetie. Ya done a good thing here. It’ll work.”
“I’m keeping my fingers crossed.”
Dite patted her back lightly. “At least you don’t have that nasty seasickness vibe any more. That was so uncool.”
Gabrielle’s chuckle turned to outright laughter. “Yeah, no kidding. Thank you for that, by the way. It’s made things a lot easier for me.”
“I’m glad,” Dite answered seriously, then lowered her voice, though no one could hear her anyway. “How are you doing with the other problem?”
Gabrielle shrugged, more than a little uncomfortable with the need that continued to plague her despite Aphrodite’s talisman. “I dunno. It’s still there, though the burning is not as fierce as it was before,” remembering her actions prior to her wearing the ring. “I take it one day at a time, but this is the first time I’ve been away from any source of um… protein since….”
“Yeah, I got what your saying, cutie. Well, if you need… anything, you call me. I don’t do blood really well, but in your case, I’ll make an exception. You’ve got enough going on here,” waving her hand around the ship and convoy, “without having to worry about that too.”
“Thanks, Dite. I’ve been a little concerned about it.”
“Anytime, babe. That’s what friends are for, right? To help each other out?”
Gabrielle smiled. “Right. I’ll be glad when I can return the favor though.”
“Nah, I’m still catching up. You and Xena totally saved my bacon a few times. Besides, I kinda like doing things for my friend instead of someone who’s made it an obligation. It’s way more fun this way.”
“Can’t argue with you.”
“True,” Aphrodite agreed loftily. “You’d lose!”
Gabrielle’s eyebrow went up and she smirked just the tiniest bit. “You think so? I am the Battling Bard, ya know,” said cheekily.
Dite laughed, glad to see more of the Gabrielle she dearly loved. “Yep, I know, babe. But you totally agree with me here so you’d be like, arguing in circles.”
Gabrielle scrunched up her face in thought. “Good point. I could give myself a real headache doing that.”
“No kidding and think you’re gonna have way more than enough of those for a while.”
“Thanks, Aphrodite! That makes me feel better,” Gabrielle replied wryly.
“Ah, c’mon, sweetie! You know it’s the truth. But I’ll always be nearby if you need me, ‘kay?”
“Yeah, I do. Thanks, though. And you know where to find me when you get ready for some girl talk.”
“Uh huh. Later, babe!”
The goddess popped out without a flourish, so no one noticed that she was gone at first. And by the time they did, everyone was immersed in their tasks, beginning a routine that would serve them well until they reached the shores of their new homeland.
Knowing it was going to take several moons of sea travel to reach the destination she and Aphrodite had decided on, Gabrielle was quick to make use of any land stops they could find along their way. It made for better relations between everyone to actually get off the ships for a while and it allowed her various regents to meet with her to discuss any problems they were having. Thankfully, those were relatively minor and only needed her guidance to steer them into the decision they knew was necessary to make.
Most importantly, these little excursions allowed her to feed and though no one was happy about her solitary hunting expeditions, no one begrudged her the need to some private time alone either. Besides, she proved more than capable of providing for herself and her sisters as she never came back to the fire empty-handed.
So the Amazon Nation leisurely made its way down the coast of Africa and headed towards the small islands known as the Sinhales.
The convoy circled the continent and finally began to make its way more northward. No one was gladder for that fact than Gabrielle and she had been thankful many times over for every single extra bit of covering they had stowed on board. The weather had become increasingly raucous and cold the further south they traveled. Many of the women became sick and there were days on end when sleep was not something she was allowed.
Just as illness started to loosen its grip on the Amazon, they ran headlong into a storm that would change… everything.
After more than two weeks of on board sickness, no one was happier to find civilization again more than Gabrielle. They’d been blown slightly off course rounding the Cape and had actually needed to backtrack to reach the island of Madagascar. But the illness that had circulated among the women had made it almost impossible not to drift and it took a bit of doing to get them back on track.
By the time the reached the island, everyone was looking forward to a bit of time on dry land and some fresh supplies. They knew to lay in as many supplies as the boat could manage, because this would be their last stop before reaching the small group of islands they had chosen for their new homeland.
The day started out fairly pleasantly for a change. The seas were calm and the sun was warming up… a nice change after believing they would freeze to death just a short week before.
The plan was to spend two or three days on shore airing out the boats and scrubbing everything and everyone down. Time would also be spent gathering fresh game and vegetation for the final leg of their voyage. They still had quite a reserve of dried food, but Gabrielle especially was beginning to suffer from the lack of fresh meat in her diet.
Several of the Amazons had noted a distinct edge to Gabrielle’s behavior, but put it down to the lack of sleep she suffered from during the sickness that had swept through their numbers. The leaders on her ship spoke to the rest of the convoy leaders and it was decided that Varia and Cyane would probably make the most headway in encouraging Gabrielle to take better care of herself. So much of their welfare depended on her well-being and they selfishly wanted her to remain well.
Gabrielle had handed out assignments to the various team leaders then headed inland quickly. By the time Varia and Cyane started on her trail, she had disappeared.
Gabrielle had been trained by the very best and even driven by her hunger and her need, she kept the hard-learned lessons of stealth in the forefront of her mind. Soon, there was no trail for even the best of Amazon scout to follow and Gabrielle began her hunt.
She whispered a prayer to Aphrodite, knowing the goddess would understand that the thanks was for the ring she wore that kept this particular ritual from becoming all-consuming. They she spotted her prey and before the deer realized her intention, she’d broken his neck and sunk her teeth into him, draining his life blood before it could cool.
She had learned early to end an animal’s life quickly to prevent needless suffering. She had developed almost an empathy for the creatures who gave their life for her continued existence as a bacchae. There were many times when she wished she could have accepted ambrosia or nectar, but understood painfully that that wasn’t her lot in the immortal scheme of things.
So Gabrielle drank til she was full; til she could feel the warmth and strength flooding back into her very veins. She found it odd to feel the renewing because when she and Xena had been together it had been nothing like this. Of course, she’d never felt as drained as she did now, except on the rare occasion when she came back from the dead.
Gabrielle smiled in wry humor and sat back to wipe her mouth. She had to be very careful. Though she was fairly certain the Amazons would accept her as an immortal eventually, she was less positive about their reaction to finding out that she was an immortal due to Bacchus. Especially since they would see her as a threat to their society, given the nature of the beast that being a bacchae was.
She cleaned and butchered her kill, saving the hide and wrapping the meat in it to carry back to the small encampment they had set up.
Varia and Cyane were waiting at the head of the footpath, having lost her trail there and hoping she would return the way she came. Their patience was eventually rewarded when they heard the faintest scuffling of footsteps bearing a heavy burden and they rose from the ground to investigate.
Gabrielle emerged from the woods and saw them waiting for her and schooled her features as much as possible. There was no way for her to control the bright burning of her eyes, though and it made her glad for the sunshine that caused her to squint.
Varia and Cyane looked Gabrielle over carefully. There did seem a marked difference in both her demeanor and her appearance, but neither could put a finger on the exact cause.
“Well, she looks better at any rate,” Varia comment sotto voce as Gabrielle reset the hide on her shoulder and began to cross the small space between them.
Cyane nodded and muttered under her breath. “Maybe she just needed some space. Gods know I’ve longed for it a time or two on this trip already.”
Gabrielle heard the discussion, but did not let it keep her from approaching them. She realized that their curiosity was motivated primarily by their concern for her and the other she could easily excuse. The Amazons had always held her and Xena to a different standard of rules and accountability and she didn’t expect it to change because she was leading them. That almost tended to make things worse in that regard. Everything she did was not suspect or challenged, but scrutinized, as though they were trying to understand the whys and wherefores of her mind’s inner workings. Flattering in a way, but very unnerving for the woman who still remembered being the young, innocent farm girl from Poteidaia.
Still, Gabrielle had long since outgrown that innocence and it was the strong, competent woman who now approached her friends.
“Ladies,” she greeted, patently ignoring the outraged eyebrows that rose in consternation to her salutation.
“Your Majesty… Gabrielle,” Cyane said as the bard set the hide down and held up her hand at the address.
“What’s up, guys?”
Varia looked up at her, squinting into the sun. “Honestly? We were just concerned about you. All of us, actually, but Cyane and I got chosen to, um….”
“We got voted to ask because we’ve known you the longest and the rest of the regents thought you’d be more likely to tell us if there was a problem.”
“Checking up on me, huh?” But the question was asked with a smile and they knew that Gabrielle wasn’t angry.
“Protecting our queen and looking after the interests of the Nation,” Cyane responded tactfully.
This made Gabrielle chuckle. “You are quite the diplomat, aren’t you? It makes you a good regent,” Gabrielle continued, noting Cyane’s deepening blush.
“It’s all right guys. I do understand and I appreciate the concern. This is just… rough for me, in ways I hadn’t imagined it would be. Sometimes I just need to go off by myself for a while and… regroup.”
That’s what we thought,” Varia said quietly. “We’ll make sure you get that as often as we can manage once we get to our new home. I don’t think it will be that easy on the ship.” She chuckled as she said it, recognizing the irony in the truth.
Gabrielle laughed as well, finally feeling the blood cooling to her normal temperature. “I’d have to agree and I appreciate the offer. I will probably take you up on it. In the meantime,” she continued, hefting the bag again, “we should get this to the camp. I’m sure a little fresh meat will be welcome around the fire.”
Two stomachs growled in tandem and the three of them burst into giggles.
“Well, all righty then. Guess that answers that question,” Gabrielle said. “C’mon. Quicker we get there, the quicker we eat.”
“Sounds like a plan,” said Varia and they headed back towards the beach encampment.
The Amazons spent three days on the shore preparing themselves for the final leg of their trip. Everything was washed and scoured and the supplies were restocked. They indulged in some games to keep things light and give them a chance to exercise and enjoy the freedom being back on land afforded them.
When it was time to board the ships again, they did so with very little grumbling. Most of them were anxious to finish the trip and get settled into their new home. This had been more traveling for the majority of the Nation than they had ever done. And now that the illness that had plagued them seemed to have passed, they were eager to get to the island, even if it meant more traveling to accomplish that goal.
Gabrielle was happy to see the peace and contentment that pervaded the ship, remembering clearly how horrid it had gotten during the sickness and their monthly cycles. It was bothersome that *that* particular curse seemed to hit everyone at once, but the Amazons were more adjusted to that fact than she was and sort of took it as a matter of course.
They quickly learned to avoid Gabrielle during those few days, though. They didn’t understand *why* she became a completely different person, but figured they could give her the space she needed if she preferred to suffer through it alone. Little did they know that she was doing her level best not to succumb to the burning that raged through her body.
So they set off in the morning with smooth seas and a light, warm wind at their back. Most of the women stayed on deck unless their duties required them to be below decks. It was simply too nice a day to spend stuck indoors if one had no call to be there.
So the first two days of the final leg of their voyage was peaceful and it wasn’t until nearly sunset of the second day that things started to go dreadfully wrong.
Gabrielle was deep into her meditative exercises when the unusual activity on the deck caught her attention. She turned her focus to the east and noted the low band of clouds on the horizon, correctly surmising the danger they posed to the Amazon fleet.
She watched the movement on deck, noticing the calm, controlled atmosphere. Every woman seemed to be aware of the pending storm, yet no one let it interfere with her duties.
Gabrielle moved to the bridge and the captain acknowledged her presence with a nod.
“Looks bad, my Queen,” patently ignoring the raised eyebrow the title earned her from Gabrielle. “We’ve been looking for a way around it for the last candlemark, but as you can see, it stretches from horizon to horizon.”
“So we go through it?”
“Yep. Hopefully it won’t be too strong or last too long, but our best bet is to meet it head on and push through it as hard and fast as we can.” The captain indicated the activity going on around her. “You can see that we’re preparing the ship as much as possible. We’ve been going back and forth with the other ships in the fleet and they are doing the same. We will try to stay together, but…. Everyone knows where we are headed, so hopefully, even if we do get separated, we will be able to find one another again once it’s over.”
“That bad, huh?”
The captain shrugged. “Natural precaution. Not like we can see what’s coming, ya know?”
Gabrielle nodded, letting her mind wander to the many times in her life she’d been blindsided by things she hadn’t been able to see coming and her breath caught at the pain those memories could still evoke.
“You all right, Gabrielle?” the captain asked solicitously, placing a gentle hand on Gabrielle’s shoulder. The blood had faded from her face, her eyes were unfocused and her breathing had become shallow and fast. “Gabrielle?”
Green eyes blinked rapidly as Gabrielle brought herself back from a place she had no desire to be. She swallowed twice before turning her attention back to the captain. “Sorry.” She cleared her throat but didn’t offer any other explanation. “What can I do to help?”
“We’re about set, my Queen. Now it’s mostly a matter of riding it out.”
Gabrielle nodded. “Very well. I’ll be in my cabin if anyone needs me.”
Gabrielle went below decks and retrieved her diary, moving to the built-in desk and readying her ink and quill. She opened it to her starting place and began recording the events of the past few days. Gabrielle still felt the calling of being a bard, but there were times, especially now, when there was simply nothing of interest to write about. Not like it had been when she and Xena…. She closed her eyes again and let the thought trail off, then forced her attention back to updating her diary.
Gabrielle had quite a bit of writing to do and she lost herself in getting all the details down. Eventually, this portion of her diary would be re-written for the Amazons, to give them their own history to keep.
It wasn’t until she slid in her chair that Gabrielle realized how much time had passed. Musta reached the storm. She glanced around, seeing clearly the rather wild pitch of the boat, then noted that she was feeling very little residual effects from the rocking motion. She looked at the ring Dite had given her and whispered a prayer of thanks. Then she sanded the ink and let it dry before closing the diary and putting it away. Then she grabbed her oiled cloak and headed back up the stairs.
The wind was furious and the rain was harsh and they nearly drove her back down the stairs before she got the door fully opened. Gabrielle pushed hard against it, then was flung to one side as the wind suddenly aided her cause. It made her more than a little angry and she channeled it into a force she could use. With a mighty shove, she slammed the door shut, then made her way slipping and sliding towards the bridge.
The topside of the ship was mostly empty… only half a dozen essential posts were manned by women who had lashed themselves to the ship with long ropes. Gabrielle held on to everything she could reach to keep from being flung overboard. The short trip took her a good deal more time than normal and she was sweating underneath her cloak by the time she arrived at her destination.
“My Queen?!” the steerswoman exclaimed loudly when she recognized her visitor.
“My Queen!!” the captain repeated, seeing who had joined them on deck. “You should get below. It’s not safe up here.” She had to yell to be heard over the storm.
Gabrielle smirked inwardly at the sentiment, though she made a conscious effort not to let it show on her face. These women had shown her nothing but respect and courtesy and they had no clue what her true situation was. There was no reason to share it immediately; her circumstances were in the realm of the extraordinary.
“Yes, Hilda, I know. But what kind of ruler hides while her people face danger?” ignoring a time when she had done just that at their expense.
“The smart kind if she understands that the survival of the entire Nation rests on her shoulders,” Hilda answered shrewdly.
Gabrielle nodded her acceptance of the statement, though she’d argued til she was blue in the face that the survival of the Amazon Nation depended on all of them together. “Point taken,” she acknowledged. “I just wanted to know how things were going.”
Hilda grabbed Gabrielle by the elbow as the ship lurched heavily to one side and nearly took their feet out from under them. “C’mon,” she shouted, trying to overcome the sound of sheeting rain. “Let me take you back to your cabin. We can talk without screaming at one another.”
Gabrielle nodded, parts of her soaked to the skin regardless of the well-oiled cloak she wore. The wind and sting of the water simply forced the wetness in.
Together they slipped and slid back to the door leading below decks and fought to pull it open against the forces of nature that were conspiring to keep it shut. With a bellow, they managed to fling the door wide, then found themselves in a tangle of limbs at the bottom of the stairs when the pitch of the ship and the strength of the storm shoved them unceremoniously down the short steps.
“Ow… I’m all right, Hilda. You?”
“Ow is right. Damn, that hurt. But I’ll live,” the captain answered, then started chuckling.
“Share the joke?” Gabrielle asked and she slowly untangled herself from both Hilda and her wet cloak, which now clung to her like a second skin. The process was complicated by the ship’s continual movement that rolled them from side to side of the narrow passageway.
“Just thinking how peculiar we must look. Reminded me of my initiation as Captain and the only other time I’ve fallen down these steps.” Gabrielle arched her eyebrow in question, then realized that Hilda wouldn’t be able to see the gesture. But before she could give it voice, the captain continued speaking.
“The crew took me out and got me good and drunk… they were sober, which was a good thing considering what happened next. The initiation involved me trying to sail the boat, in open waters, mind you, while I was still trying to figure out which way was up.”
Hilda regained her feet and braced against the walls, then leaned down and offered Gabrielle a hand up. “I did all right until I decided to come downstairs for another bottle. I missed the steps completely and Mel, being the good first mate she is steered us directly into a storm. I rolled around down here for what felt like days praying to the gods not to toss my cookies. It took me half a day to get up off the floor and another two days to recover from the seasickness Mel managed to give me with her helmsmanship. I won’t tell you how long it took to get rid of the bruises. I decided then and there to never have cause to be rolling around in this passageway.”
Gabrielle chuckled. “Well, I can’t say it’d be my chosen method for travel. Ya wanna know the bad part? We’ve gotta get back up and close that door.”
Hilda banged her head on the wall. They were standing only because she was braced against the walls holding Gabrielle by the elbow. Gabrielle reached for the railing, swaying as the ship rolled against her action. The Captain placed a steadying hand on Gabrielle’s back and eased behind her to provide support if something caused her to fall.
It took a few minutes as Gabrielle had no desire for a repeat experience of head over heels down the stairs again, but eventually she did manage to pull the door shut with a resounding thud. Several amazons lurched up the passageway, having finally decided to see what all the commotion was. Gabrielle waved them back.
“Everything is fine. Go back to your cabins.”
“Are you sure, my Queen? You both look a little, um….”
Hilda pointed, but didn’t touch Gabrielle. “She’s probably talking about the cut, although the bruise is pretty nice too.”
Suddenly Gabrielle was acutely aware of the scent of blood and she felt a burning begin in her blood. The Amazon was offering her a towel and she took it, hoping to remove the smell of copper that made the hunger grow.
She drew a deep breath to contain the need and turned partially away from the onlookers. “Captain, why don’t you go get into something dry and have those marks seen to? Then come back and join me and we will talk.”
Before Hilda could respond, Gabrielle slipped into her own cabin and closed the door firmly behind her.
The Amazons in the hall looked at the captain who shrugged back at them. “You heard the queen. Return to your cabins, especially those of you on the next shift. You need to be completely rested.”
The nodded their understanding, though not without a backwards glance before they entered their own living spaces. Hilda turned and entered the cabin across from Gabrielle’s wondering what had happened to change her mood so swiftly. Then she concentrated on drying off. She didn’t change though, knowing she had to return to the bridge shortly. She did pour herself a cup of wine. She’d gotten the message that Gabrielle needed a little space and damned if she wasn’t going to give it to her.
Gabrielle, for her part, sat on her bunk and focused all her energies on simply being and breathing. In… out… in… out… until the rhythm was all she knew and she felt her heartbeat calm and steady. Then she blew out a breath and proceeded to change into a dry tunic and pour herself a cup of wine.
A few more minutes passed before a light knock was heard at her door and Gabrielle realized that Hilda had given her extra time to change and she smiled in appreciation of the gesture. She rose and opened the door, her eyebrows shooting to her hairline when she realized that the captain was still in wet clothing.
“I have to get back on deck,” Hilda responded to the unasked question. “No point in soaking a second set of clothes.”
“Hmm,” was all Gabrielle said, though she managed to convey her agreement in the tone. “Come in and tell me how bad it is.”
Hilda crossed the threshold and took the chair at the desk. Gabrielle resumed her seat on the bed and waited expectantly.
“It’s bad, your Majesty. We are being drawn off course, but it is impossible to tell how badly or how far. I won’t be able to tell anything for certain until the storm stops and we have a chance to get our bearings.”
“What about the other ships?”
Hilda rested her elbows on her knees and dropped her hands between her legs. “I know there are at least three of us still together. At separate times I have seen the ships on either side of us pop up out of the storm.” She didn’t tell Gabrielle how closely they’d come to ramming the first one.
Gabrielle sat still, considering. “Well,” she said at last, “guess we will just hope for the best for now and work with whatever we end up with when this thing blows over.” Gabrielle sat up a little straighter and caught Hilda’s eyes. “I see no reason for this to get out right now. There’s no reason to send everyone into a panic over something we can do absolutely nothing about.”
Hilda nodded. “Agreed, my Queen. I’ll keep you posted as things develop.”
“Thank you, Hilda. You’re doing a great job!”
The captain blushed. “Thank you, your Majesty. Now if you’ll excuse me….”
Gabrielle nodded and waved Hilda out, then shook her head. She’d done her best to break the Amazons of the habit of referring to her by title, but it was so ingrained in them that she’d given it up as a lost cause.
With a sigh, she finished her wine and turned to her diary which she opened it up and began to read. The storm continued to lash out furiously around her, but Gabrielle never noticed as she allowed her own words to take her back into memories that through the coming years would make her laugh and cry and keep her company like the old friends they were.
For two more days the storm raged around them and by then everyone on board was wet, sick and miserable. When they finally saw the sun break through in the early afternoon of the third day, the crew cheered, heartened by both its presence and the presence of their sister ships. Somehow, they had all managed to come through relatively intact, it seemed. It would take a day or two to determine the damage the storm had wrought.
As it was, they were all happy to see sunshine and calm water and by mutual consent they dropped anchor and took the opportunity to air out their bodies and their ships. Gabrielle and the captains had ascertained the need for both a bit of R&R and the establishment of their location. That couldn’t happen until evening, so they moored the boats and swung into high gear, intent on enjoying the brief respite they’d been offered.
As sundown approached, the women sat around on the various decks, enjoying a meal of freshly prepared fish and calling back and forth to one another. Gabrielle sat a little apart in the bow, watching the Nation that had once been on the edge of extinction slowly coming back to life before her eyes.
Her reverie was disturbed when Hilda came and sat down silently next to her. The captain didn’t speak, but sat waiting to be acknowledged. Gabrielle didn’t turn to her, but instead gestured to the many happy women on the seven ships.
“It’s good to see the Amazons whole again. For a very long time, we were fractured, despondent.”
“You’ve given them hope again, my Queen… a future to look forward to instead of pining for a past that will never be again.”
Now Gabrielle turned and looked at Hilda intently. “The future is what they make of it Hilda… not me.”
“Perhaps, but you will always be remembered as the Queen who saved the Nation.”
Gabrielle didn’t reply, but instead looked back out over the water to the ships in their small fleet. Hilda got the distinct impression she’d crossed a line best left alone and cleared her throat. Gabrielle forestalled her apology.
“How far off course do you think we are?”
The captain blinked, her mind shifting gears to put her on a complete opposite track from the one she’d been running on. She’d come up her with something else entirely different on her mind, but she gamely put her own thoughts to one side for the moment and focused on the question she’d been asked.
“It’s hard to say, your Majesty, but I would definitely say I’m concerned. It’s just a hunch, since we’re sitting in the middle of the sea with no visible reference yet, but I don’t think we’re anywhere close to where we were, or where we should be.”
Gabrielle nodded, having come to much the same conclusion herself. “Very well, Captain. Please keep me advised once we’ve determined where we are.” She stood. “I’ll be in my cabin.”
Hilda decided to take the plunge. “My Que… Gabrielle….” gently.
But Gabrielle held up a hand. “Hilda, please don’t. You’re a lovely young woman and I imagine any woman here would be happy to be your partner.”
“Just not you,” Hilda responded with only a hint of bitterness. Life continued to flow around them… no one noticing the little drama that was unfolding on the bow of the ship.
“Just not me,” Gabrielle answered with honest sincerity. “My heart belongs to another, Hilda and it always has. I can’t change that and I wouldn’t if I could.”
“But Xena’s dead, Gabrielle!!” It was said with quiet harshness. “Do you intend be alone for the rest of your life??”
Gabrielle smiled sadly, understanding far too well just how long that would be and the seeming eternity that stood between her and her warrior. “Xena owns my heart Hilda and without that, I can’t care for anyone else. Not that way. And it’s not fair to ask… not you, not me, not anyone… to live with a sham of love.”
“And if I want to?”
Gabrielle clasped the captain’s arm and squeezed gently before she released it. “I won’t.” She moved away and reached the stairs before she turned back to Hilda. “I’d like for us to remain friends, but that’s your decision. I won’t force anything you’re not comfortable with. However, as your Queen, I’m asking that you notify me when we have our position fixed.”
Hilda blinked and squared her shoulders, then she nodded her head. “Yes, my Queen. It should be about a candlemark before the stars are out enough for us to get a good reading from them.”
“Thank you, Hilda,” Gabrielle replied, then turned without another word and made her way to her cabin. Hilda stayed at the bow for some time longer, looking out over the horizon and contemplating the truth of Gabrielle’s words. Then she straightened and made her way to the bridge. There was work to do.
It was less than a full candlemark when the knock came to her door. Gabrielle had been dozing lightly, letting her mind drift. Now she sat up and called out, “Come in.”
The door opened and Hilda crossed the threshold, just stepping into the room. “Gabrielle, you need to come on deck.”
Gabrielle rubbed her hand across her face. “That bad, huh?”
“It’s gotta be seen to be believed, my Queen.”
When they arrived back on deck, Gabrielle was surprised to see not only the other captains, but also her interim regents waiting for her on deck surrounding a small table that had been brought up. They all bowed their heads respectfully and Gabrielle strove not to roll her eyes.
That got more than one head to pop up immediately and glares from several who did before they could school their features into impassiveness. Gabrielle chuckled and the Amazons joined her, appreciating her humor and the effort at tension breaking.
“What have we got?” The group looked at one another, no one wanting to be the one to share the news. Gabrielle grew impatient and sighed loudly. “Somebody better start talking before I do something really outrageous,” hoping they wouldn’t call her on it. She really wasn’t sure how outrageous she could be on short notice to a bunch of Amazon women, though she’d certainly had her share of moments over the years.
“Your Majesty, we can’t find our position on any of the charts we have. According to them we are in a place that doesn’t exist.”
“Excuse me?” sure she’d misunderstood.
Hilda blew out a breath and pulled the charts and maps over to her. “You’ve studied the stars, learned to navigate by them, haven’t you?” Gabrielle nodded, remembering the time it had taken for her to master that skill and Xena’s gentle, patient teaching. “Do these patterns look at all familiar to you?” passing a particular chart over to Gabrielle and effectively pulling her from her reverie.
Gabrielle held her breath, easily recognizing the bear pattern and the hunter and the bull. She let her fingers trace the familiar shapes and she nodded. “We spent many nights studying these patterns,” she commented in a low tone, clearly recalling their standing arguments on the subject. But everyone heard the words and felt the remorse that slipped into her voice. Hilda ignored it and continued.
“Okay then… now look up.”
Gabrielle did so, then her forehead creased in confusion. What she saw was foreign to her, unrecognizable. In all her travels, she’d never seen the stars… well, honestly, it looked as though they were standing on their heads.
Gabrielle rubbed her temples, then turned her back on the group, walking away from them slightly. She pressed her hands to her lips as she thought, then spun back around to continue the conversation, realizing this news put a whole new spin on everything.
“Well, anybody have a preference on a direction? Do the currents indicate any land nearby?”
Now Varia spoke up. “Not really, though they seem to be flowing eastwardly.”
Gabrielle nodded at the information. “I guess we’ll head east then.” She looked around at the group that nodded their agreement. “Do we have a mapmaker among us?”
“Yes, my Queen,” one of the other captains answered. “We have several.”
“Good. Let’s see if we can get these new star patterns charted. Maybe once we find land and get settled, we’ll have a chance to study them and figure out where we ended up.”
There was a palpable relaxation of the tension surrounding the group at Gabrielle’s sure words. It had occurred to all of them just how tenuous their position was, being lost at sea in uncharted waters. Now they felt a renewal of optimism and each of them smiled.
“All right,” Gabrielle continued as though nothing had happened. “I know it’s late, but the sooner we get started the sooner we get home. So let’s tend to business and get ourselves home. I’m really not that fond of being on a ship.”
They laughed then, having heard some of her tales of previous sea excursions. And truth be told, they were all pretty anxious to reach dry land themselves. This journey had turned into far more of an adventure than most of them had expected or bargained for.
Several more weeks passed and tempers were running short. They hadn’t encountered any more serious storms, though a couple of rain showers did blow through. It was a welcome respite and it provided fresh water, which was naturally at a premium.
Still, their lack of direction and knowledge of their whereabouts was wearing and more and more often, Gabrielle’s diplomatic skills were called on to keep fights from breaking out.
Finally, near the end of her rope, Gabrielle called for a sparring match, taking on all comers. They had all seen her practice routines and knew about her defeat at Varia’s hands. So they figured that though Gabrielle was a capable warrior, she could be defeated.
What they didn’t know and couldn’t understand was that Gabrielle’s knowledge of her immortality had made her fearless. And the blood need had made her aggressive. So it was a very weary, very beaten group of Amazons that were scattered on the deck by day’s end.
“My Queen, when we reach land, will you be giving weapons instruction?”
Gabrielle swallowed the wine she had in her mouth before answering. “Probably not. There will be so much to do getting the Nation set up.” She was glad they were talking positively about their new home. It had been touch and go and they were understandably disturbed by the unknowns they now faced. It took her a moment to notice the universal slump of shoulders in all the women who had faced her in combat. “Why?”
The women looked around at one another. Finally the bravest of them spoke up.
“We were hoping to learn from you.”
Gabrielle blinked. It wasn’t something she’d been expecting to hear. EVER. Especially not from the Amazons. Always before, Xena had stood for her and the one time she’d fought on her own, she’d been defeated badly by a warrior who had since proven herself less than worthy to hold the title of Queen. Even after she’d led them at Helicon, it had never been something she’d imagined hearing from them. So now Gabrielle, Queen of the Amazons, sat breathing and blinking, absorbing the recognition of her skill and ability which was in its own way a coming of age.
The amazons waited quietly, knowing by her expression that Gabrielle was not with them in this time and place. Eventually she turned back to them with a smile.
“I think I could arrange some time for that if you’d really like it. I never considered it before.” She smiled. “Thank you for asking me.”
A cheer went up from all the Amazons on the flagship that was heard across the small fleet. It would be a little while before the rest of the Nation understood and accepted the enthusiasm of their sisters.
Three days later, during what was quickly becoming the first of three daily sparring sessions, a cry went up from the lookout of the ship farthest to the north. Excitedly, every woman who was not working ran to the railing to get a good look.
“Land! Land ho!!”
The Amazon Nation had finally found what was going to become their new home.
It took the better part of the day to reach land. The flagship actually beached itself unintentionally when the water became a sandbar with very little warning. They debarked themselves and a few supplies. Gabrielle had decided they were sleeping on shore even though there was no possible way to unload their supplies and find shelter. The weather looked good and for tonight, she simply wanted to lay on the ground and look up at the upside down stars and remember.
The Amazons were glad to step foot on dry land again, even though they were stepping out into the unknown. It felt good to be walking on flat earth and working parties were quickly formed. Each regent had been specially chosen as a leader of a specific sect. Now they took charge of the women under their command and soon the Amazons were spread out… some hunting, some scouting for recognizable plant life, others gathering firewood or the large green leafed boughs they found spread out under the foliage that lined the beach area.
Some of the women that remained began to clear an area for a temporary camp and the rest went back to the ships to remove the things they would need immediately. Soon the area was alive with activity.
Several times, Gabrielle felt the tickle of eyes on her skin, but though she dismissed it as being one of the Amazons, she couldn’t rub away the tingling feeling at the back of her neck. And she never found any of the women glance her way unless they were addressing her directly. They were all too busy to notice her. Eventually, the feeling faded and the hunters and scouts returned to the beachhead. Gabrielle put the feeling away for later study and forced her attention to the Nation in front of her.
The evening passed pleasantly as the Amazons ate fresh game the hunters had provided and the tubers the scouts had found. There were no longer barriers between the different tribes and factions. The voyage over had made them a single nation, for which fact Gabrielle was extremely grateful. It would make her job easier and would hopefully help them transition into the new life they were beginning more smoothly.
It took several days for the boats to be unloaded completely. It was expected, given the fact that they were stripping the ships to skeletons, but Gabrielle also had some of the Amazons building a few shelters as well. She had discussed it with her council and they had determined this would make a good outpost for them for several reasons. There was already a group of women set to rotate back to the beach as soon as the Nation had found a permanent settlement.
Finally, the women were ready and slowly they moved inward. After four days travel, the Amazons came to a place that made them stop in awe. There was a wall of granite on two sides that rose high into the air. A bit of investigation revealed that it seemed to be at the end of a mountain chain and there were several caves and crevices that would provide storage and shelter.
At the base of the wall on the third side was a thick forest with a clear river and after four days of sand and scrub, it was a welcome, restful sight. The procession slowed, gradually coming to a halt while Gabrielle walked slightly ahead of them. The council followed her until she motioned them to stay put and she stepped forward several more paces before turning to face the remnants of the Amazon Nation.
“Ladies, I think we have found our new home.”
A cheer rose from the Amazons and it was almost loud enough to drown the sensation Gabrielle still had of being watched.
The next several months were busy as the Amazons slowly carved out a niche for themselves in this rough and tumble new world. They were mindful of the fact that they were establishing a nation they hoped would last for a long time to come and were very careful to preserve as many of their resources as possible. They had learned all too well that nothing was in unlimited supply and it was a lesson they took to heart seriously.
Besides, this new land was harsh and it seemed loathe to give up any of its dearly hoarded resources without a fight. But slowly, steadily, the Amazons were forging a place for themselves in their new world.
The beach outpost had been successfully established and already the women were rotating in and out of there regularly. A second outpost had been set in the forest and a third existed at the top of the wall close to the mountain range. The Amazons felt well- protected and were settling in nicely.
Gabrielle continued to get the random feeling of being watched, but the scouts never reported any other human life and she herself had been unable to find any definite traces of humanity in her nightly treks.
She more then any of them was glad to be back on land, despite the new challenges and dangers they faced. It was much easier to control the blood need that sporadically coursed through her veins and she greatly appreciated having her own space… not that she hadn’t had that on the ship. She had and the women were most respectful of it. But here, surrounded by mountains and trees and earth, Gabrielle felt the freedom she had known on the road with Xena.
Thoughts like those tended to turn maudlin very quickly and she allowed her attention to drift to her surroundings. Gabrielle was sitting on the wall cliff, affording her a view that just hinted at the large body of water beyond. Her mind focused on the ring she wore and she suddenly realized how long it had been since she’d spoken to Aphrodite and it dawned on her why that was.
“I miss you, my friend,” she said aloud. “When you get a few free minutes, look around and see if you can find me, huh? I’d still like to keep in touch, even though we are no where near where we’re supposed to be.” Gabrielle’s eyes widened in thought. “Guess we’re gonna have two colonies of Amazons, ’cause I doubt fate will intervene every time a new group of women try to join us.”
The weather was cooling quickly as the seasons shifted towards winter and Gabrielle shivered as the sun slid below the horizon. “So awkward to have winter coming when I’m expecting summer to be here instead,” she commented, knowing Cyane was coming up behind her.
“I agree… everything is upside down and backwards here, but it’s a nice place to be.”
Gabrielle waited. She knew something was bothering Cyane because everyone respected her privacy at sunset on the rare occasion that she made the trek up to the top of the wall to watch them. Instead, they sat quietly together until darkness fell completely and the wind began to pick up across the plain. Finally, Cyane spoke into the silence.
“My Queen, I am a little concerned.” She waited for Gabrielle to turn her head before she continued speaking. “Two things, actually and they may or may not be related.”
“Okay, what’s up?”
“Well, you may think I’m losing my mind, especially since we haven’t seen any indication of human life, but I’d swear more than once that we’ve been being watched. Can’t really explain it as more than a feeling, but it’s there and it’s real.”
Gabrielle nodded her understanding and waited for Cyane to resume speaking.
“In a way I hope my feelings are right,” seeing the expected eyebrow shoot into the blonde hairline. “If they are others here, even if we haven’t found them, that’s good for us. They obviously don’t mind us being here, or they would surely have objected to our presence by now. And truthfully, we need them if we are to have any hope for the survival of our nation.”
Gabrielle sat quietly for a little while thinking over what Cyane had shared. Then she stood and dusted herself off and waited while Cyane did the same.
“I’ve noticed the same subtle signs of habitation, but like you I can’t find any other real proof aside from my feelings and I’m not sure how to describe it… an odd displacement of air, maybe?”
Cyane nodded. “Exactly. That’s exactly what it is. Holes in the air that weren’t there before.”
“Well, things are settling down now since we have the basics done in the village, maybe we should set up some hunting parties with specific instructions on what we want them to be hunting for. If we have neighbors, I think we should try to get to know them. It’d be nice to know where we stood before the cold weather settles in to stay.”
“I’ll see what we can put together. I think we can ge….” Cyane stopped speaking as one of the scouts who’d had duty in the outpost near the mountain approached them at a run. Gabrielle had put a halt to kneeling and bowing, but the scout still bobbed her head in acknowledgement.
“My… Queen. Cyane.”
Gabrielle reached out and put a hand on the woman’s shoulder. “Take a minute and catch your breath, Chia.” For a moment nothing was heard but her harsh breathing and Gabrielle met Cyane’s gaze evenly, reading the same questions in the blue eyes facing her that she had in her own mind. Cyane shrugged and crossed her arms over her chest, waiting for the younger Amazon to continue speaking.
“Lana, Trei and I have the watch in the mountains this week. About a candlemark ago, I heard something, or thought I did and Trei volunteered to keep watch while I did some scouting. Just as the sun dropped to the horizon… well, I can’t say I caught her, but an older woman simply walked out of the shadows and right up to me. Scared the centaur poop right outta me… gods! Anyway,” she hastily continued, remembering who she was talking to. “This woman walked right up to me and for the longest time just looked at me.”
“What did she look like?” Cyane interrupted.
Chia stopped abruptly, focusing her gaze inward a moment as she bit her tongue in thought. “Older, like one of our elders with similar clothing. Dark-skinned, but from the sun and not by birth. She had dark eyes and hair which was shoulder length and braided with beads and feathers on the left side, similar to what our warriors do, but different in style. She had several piercings and her tattoos were interesting… swirls and things that covered most of her left arm.” Chia demonstrated.
“So what happened?” Gabrielle asked to get things back on track. Chia’s description of the woman gave Gabrielle a prickling in her thumbs for reasons she couldn’t explain and she wanted to know more.
“Oh, um well, she stood there and looked at me without saying a word, then she reached out a hand to touch me. I move back and grabbed my knife.” Here Chia blushed. “She laughed at me. That made me kinda mad and I swung. She took me to the ground like I was a pup. Then she spoke.”
“WELL??” Cyane roared when the silence grew lengthy.
“Oh, sorry,” Chia said. “She looked at me and said in perfect Greek, ‘You’re an Amazon?’ I told her I was. So then she said, ‘The blonde woman who leads you….’ I think she was waiting for me to fill in the blank for her, but I didn’t, I just stood there waiting. Finally she realized I wasn’t going to offer her any information and she nodded her head almost approvingly. ‘Is her name Gabrielle?'”
At these words, Gabrielle’s head flew up. Chia chuckled and Gabrielle arched a brow at her.
“I’m sorry, my Queen, but that was EXACTLY my reaction. I didn’t answer, but I think that may have given it away. However, the woman didn’t press me further. She simply gave me something and asked me to give it to you. Said you would recognize it and that she would be in touch once you’d seen it so you’d have a chance to decide for yourself what happened next.”
Gabrielle held out her hand and waited for the object. Chia took the small backpack she carried off and opened it, lifting a wrapped bundle from it and placing it in Gabrielle’s hand. Even the darkness couldn’t hide the slight trembling in her hand as the moon provided ample light to see by. Gabrielle slowly removed the outer covering, then gasped in astonishment as her eyes took in a truth she wouldn’t have believed without the physical proof she now held in her hands.
She forgot about the two other women standing with her and cast her mind back more than thirty years before, when she’d first been introduced to the Amazons.
How many times had she hit herself with the staff? Six? Eight? A dozen? Her head hurt and her muscles ached even worse. She’d never felt as clumsy and out of place as she did with all these warrior women who obviously disdained her presence among them.
Still, in the midst of everything and while Xena was off trying to solve the mystery of who exactly was trying to start a war between the Amazons and the Centaurs, Gabrielle continued to try to master this new weapon she’d been accorded by Amazon law and tradition.
Her teacher was very patient and very quiet and Gabrielle, in her own exuberant way, tried to draw the older woman out, but aside from giving her instruction and occasional one words answers to her questions, Gabrielle didn’t get much out of her instructor.
After Krykus was defeated, Gabrielle and Xena returned to the road and Xena resumed Gabrielle’s staff instruction until the bard was a force to be reckoned with by any standards. It was during this time that Xena’s death brought them back into contact with the Amazons and once that matter was resolved Gabrielle had the opportunity to show off the skills she’d developed.
Xena stood to one side and watched proudly as Gabrielle wiped the floor with every Amazon that approached her. Finally, her one-time instructor took her on and Gabrielle not only held her own, but managed to defeat her after several spirited minutes of sparring.
Xena grinned proudly, even as the weapons master stood there in open-mouthed disbelief. Eventually she shook her head and walked from the field without a word. Gabrielle looked at Xena askance… she hadn’t expected to win, but she’d expected less to see poor sportsmanship. Xena shrugged and wrapped an arm around Gabrielle’s shoulders smiling at the way the bard fit into her naturally. They turned to walk off the practice field when they saw the instructor coming back at a run. When she reached them, she knelt before Gabrielle and held up a ceremonial blade in a beautifully crafted sheath.
Gabrielle reached out a hand to touch it, then turned to Xena questioningly. Xena shrugged nonchalantly and looked at the Amazon eyebrow raised in question.
“This was the blade I earned in our last weapons competition. If you can defeat me so easily it should be yours.”
Gabrielle looked at Xena in consternation. She couldn’t keep this, even if she wanted to. They had no place to put it for one thing and there was no way she could carry it. She’d already made the conscious decision not to fight with a blade. Besides, this was obviously something that meant a great deal to the other woman and Gabrielle made a mental note to ask Ephiny about the history behind the sword itself.
“I have an idea,” Gabrielle said suddenly. “I will accept this if you will agree to be its keeper.” Gabrielle almost smiled at the confusion that crossed the weapons master’s face. “I can’t keep it, Eponin,” she said softly, “but I will not affront your honor by refusing it. So I’m asking you to remain as the blade’s guardian.”
The older woman thought about it for a moment, then nodded her acceptance. Gabrielle took the blade and nodded and Eponin rose to her feet.
“Thank you, my Queen.”
Gabrielle smiled now as she slid the blade from its sheath, feeling the quill etching she’d had added to it before she’d returned the sword to her teacher. Her smile faltered when her fingers fell on something unfamiliar and yet…. Well, she’d take a look at it in the daylight. In the meantime….
“Thank you, Chia. This is probably one of the nicest things to happen to me in a while.”
They wanted to question her; she knew they did. But her rank, as much as their respect for her leadership, kept them silent. Instead, Chia nodded again and murmured, “If you’ll excuse me, my Queen. I need to report back to my post.”
Gabrielle nodded, her thoughts far away again. She and Cyane stood together silently as Chai ran back towards the mountain outpost. When Gabrielle turned to make her way back to the village, Cyane accompanied her without a word.
Gabrielle appreciated the quiet; she was busy contemplating the possibilities of what she now held in her hand.
“I’m telling you, Varia. It was the ceremonial sword of Artemis.”
“Cyane, how can you be sure of that? It was dark. And it’s not like you ever actually saw it. It’s been missing for more than thirty years.”
Cyane stripped off her top and groaned in relief as she bathed off with the warm water Varia had been thoughtful enough to provide. “Gods, that’s nice. It got damned cold out there.” She put on a clean shirt. “All right, Varia. Don’t believe me. But I’m telling you that is the ceremonial sword and you’ll know it when you see it. It looks just like the stories described. Although….”
“I’d like to get a good look at the etching on the blade. There is more there than the stories told.”
Varia rolled her eyes. “There is no way you could have seen that in the dark, even if you were standing in Gabrielle’s personal space. The moon just doesn’t get that bright.”
Cyane swatted Varia on the shoulder. “Don’t be a smartass. It was more the look that crossed Gabrielle’s face. Now come on… I need a drink.”
Gabrielle made her way to her dwelling without incident. The village was a mixture of cave dwellings and log huts and Gabrielle had secured a cave for herself. It had a hot spring near the back which had been the deciding factor in her choice. She was still looking for a back way out, but for now she was satisfied with the arrangement she had. Not like I’m in danger of dying, though the feeling of confinement was sometimes a little overwhelming.
All in all, though, she liked her living arrangements and tonight she was especially glad for the privacy the cavern afforded her. She stoked the fire, bringing the blaze back up, grateful for both the light and the warmth. She put on water to heat for tea and laid the sheath next to her bedroll. Then she moved to the hot spring to clean up.
She didn’t dawdle, but instead bathed hurriedly and redressed, catching her tea water just as it boiled. Then she put it on to steep and turned her attention back to the sword and its keeper. She noted there were new markings on the blade.
“Eponin, how did you get here?” she asked aloud and suddenly she was anxious for the morrow and the answers it would reveal.
Morning saw Gabrielle walking towards the mountain outpost just as the sun began to creep over the rocky horizon. She didn’t expect to find Eponin waiting for her there, but she felt confident that Eponin’s extraordinary surveillance of them would insure her presence soon enough.
She nodded a greeting to the sentry who stood outside the post then headed into the small open area beyond. She felt the sentry’s hesitation, torn between remaining at her post and accompanying her Queen to a place that the Amazons considered to be outside their borders. A hand signal was all it took and with a frown the sentry resumed her lookout.
The meadow had been an unexpected find. It was a tiny bit of grassland that was surrounded by mountains and trees. Gabrielle had the uncanny feeling that when she came, Eponin would instinctively look for her there. Gabrielle sat on a log and removed the blade from the sheath. Her fingers gently traced the etchings old and new as she waited for her friend to arrive.
It wasn’t a sound as much as it was a feeling, but Gabrielle remained still for a long moment before she looked up. There before her knelt an older woman head bowed in an attitude of respect. Gabrielle reached forward hesitantly not wishing to offend, but needing to know for certain.
When her hand reached the woman’s shoulder, her head came up and Gabrielle looked upon a friend she had honestly never expected to see again. A million things ran through her mind, but all that came out of her mouth was “Oh, Eponin!”
The warrior took the proffered hands of her Queen but made no move to stand until Gabrielle said softly, “Rise, my friend.” She did so with alacrity and was engulfed in an embrace so profound it hurt. For long moments the hug went on, until with some embarrassment at the tears in her eyes, Eponin pulled away.
Gabrielle unashamedly wiped at her eyes, then tugged on the older woman’s hand until they were seated side by side. They took a bit of time to study one another and Gabrielle knew that unless things had changed dramatically, she would have to be the one to break the silence.
“You look wonderful, Eponin. It is so good to see you again, no matter how unexpected.”
Eponin chuckled. “You haven’t changed at all, Gabrielle and I’ll bet there is a Tartarus of a story behind the reason for that.”
“More than you know, my friend. More than you know.”
Eponin hesitated, having so many things she wanted to asked, but fairly certain she didn’t want to hear the answers. Gabrielle waited, not sure where to begin. Finally Eponin spoke.
“Where is Xena and what happened to the others – Ephiny, Solari and Chilapa? So many new faces in the people you brought with you and so many old faces missing.”
Gabrielle smiled sadly. “That is all part of my long story. I’ll share mine if you’ll share yours.”
Eponin nodded. “It is one reason I asked to meet with you after I was sure it was you and the Amazons that were here. That and I needed to return the sword,” motioning to the ceremonial blade that now lay on the ground between them. “It belongs with the Nation.”
“I’ll start, I guess,” Gabrielle said and launched into the tale of what had happened in the thirty years since she had seen the weapons master. Eponin’s eyes grew increasingly large as Gabrielle’s story unfolded and more than once she wiped tears from her eyes.
“That is… um, well….”
“Amazing? Unbelievable? Bizarre beyond description? All of the above?”
Eponin chuckled, as much of an emotional release as anything else, though there was certainly an ironic humor at work here.
“Yes,” she answered with another soft laugh. “Certainly makes my story tame by comparison.”
“What is your story, Ep?” The last time I saw you….”
“The last time you saw me, we were still kids, although gods know I didn’t think *I* was. I didn’t have any doubts about you.”
“Hey!” Gabrielle exclaimed in mock outrage, but had to acknowledge the words for the truth. She was surprised at Eponin’s gregariousness and wondered if it was due to her years’ experiences since leaving the Nation or if it was simply the astonishing encounter they were how having. Gabrielle gave a mental shrug. Either way, it was nice to actually be able to have a conversation, especially with an old friend who would understand and appreciate just the tiniest bit what Gabrielle had to look forward to.
“I like this,” Gabrielle said when the silence threatened to become awkward, motioning to the chakram that had been etched around her quill on the sword’s blade. “It fits, somehow.”
Eponin shrugged. “I remembered when it was all over and you were wrapped in Xena’s arms that night how perfectly you fit together. I didn’t add it for along time, but when it became apparent I would never make it home again, it just seemed like the right thing to do.”
Gabrielle smiled. “You won’t be terribly surprised if I agree with you, will you?”
“Nah. I’d be more surprised if you didn’t, even with everything.”
Silence fell then for a time and Gabrielle was content to let it stay until Eponin felt comfortable with whatever it was she had to share. Eventually, the weapons master drew a deep breath and began to speak.
“You know how things were after Velaska,” Eponin started with no prelude. Gabrielle nodded and waited silently. “Eph and the council talked it over and it was decided to try and bring all the tribes together.”
Eponin smiled at the look on Gabrielle’s face and nodded. “Yeah, even then the Amazons were trying to consolidate the tribes. Anyway, we knew where some were and then there were others… ones we’d only heard about through legends and stories passed down through generations.”
“It was decided that someone would go and see if these lost tribes could be found. I volunteered.”
She shrugged again and looked at Gabrielle. “I figured, how hard could it be, right? I mean the stories had clues indicating where to find them if you knew how and where to look and I did.” Eponin shook her head. “What arrogance. I had no clue what I was getting into and I was so sure I could manage on my own. I did find the first two in Africa. Then I made the mistake of getting on a boat.”
Eponin cut her eyes at her Queen. “Do you know what it’s like to be on a ship when you’re prone to seasickness? Do you know what it’s like to be on a ship during a storm when you’re prone to seasickness??”
Gabrielle laughed out loud so hard that she slid from the log. “Have you ever eaten raw squid because the cure for your seasickness killed your taste buds?” she countered. Eponin made a face.
“Well, ew! I’m not sure which is worse.”
Gabrielle climbed back on the log, still chuckling. “Me either, actually, though I’d be tempted to go with the squid, cause you’re still gonna chuck it right back up.”
“Oh, thank you for that image, my Queen. Just what I needed to start my day out right.”
“Happy to help,” came the cheeky answer, then Gabrielle motioned for her to continue.
“I never knew I suffered from seasickness… I’d never been on a boat before. Imagine my unhappy surprise. About three days out from the coast, we hit a massive storm. I dunno what happened after that exactly. I was too busy being seriously ill. When they storm finally relented, we were just off the coast here. I was traded for fresh supplies.”
The last was said so low, Gabrielle had to strain to catch the words. And then she blinked as she tried to understand them.
Eponin hurried on to save them both the embarrassment of her having to repeat her words. “I was too sick to stop them and the crew traded me to the locals in return for fresh supplies to try and make their way back home. The headman took a liking to me.” She shrugged depreciatingly.
Gabrielle reached out a tentative hand, pleased when the weapons master didn’t flinch away from her touch. “Eponin, are you unhappy here? Are you being held against your will? You’re still an Amazon, you know and you are always welcome among your sisters.”
Eponin’s smile was genuine. “I’m not unhappy, Gabrielle. I found a place for myself here and as much as the Amazons are a part of me, this land and the people who live here are also my home and my family. In fact, I’ve come to talk to you about that.”
Gabrielle cocked her head. She had a fair idea of where this was going, but she didn’t want to presume. Eponin glanced at her, then looked out across the meadow.
“We, my tribe, have been watching the Nation since you all arrived here. Once the scouts realized what was going on with the settlement, I was brought in to help determine your fate. When I recognized you, I realized what must have happened with the Nation and I explained to the headman what I believed was going on.”
Gabrielle nodded. “The men of my tribe are willing to work an arrangement with the Amazons similar to what we had with the surrounding villages in Greece. They would welcome the boy children into their village while the girls would stay with their Amazon mothers.”
“How do the village women feel?”
Eponin shrugged. “Well, their society allows a man to have more than one wife. So it’s not something they are unused to.”
“Wait… are you saying the Amazons will have to marry these men to mate with them?? Eponin….”
“No, no, Gabrielle.” She ran a hand through her graying hair. “I’m not explaining this well. They understand what the Nation needs to survive and are willing to provide the service necessary.”
“In exchange for…? C’mon Ep… we all know nothing is free in this life… or any other for that matter.”
Eponin cut her eyes over at Gabrielle. “Anyone ever tell you you’ve gotten cynical in your old age, Gabrielle?”
Gabrielle sighed wearily. “I’ve seen too much of the world Eponin and it’s not a pretty place. People do what they have to do to survive and that usually doesn’t bring out the best in them.”
Eponin sat quietly absorbing the truth in Gabrielle’s words. “The tribe is willing to provide men for child-making in exchange for all the male children that are born. It’s good for you and good for them.”
Gabrielle nodded. “All right. I’ll take it to the council, though I don’t think they will refuse. It’s been a concern. And in the meantime, perhaps I can meet with the headman? Maybe they will be willing to set up some sort of trade.”
Eponin smiled. “I think I can arrange that. The tribe has been anxious to meet the Amazons, but especially you, since you arrived.”
“C’mon then,” Gabrielle said as she stood, extending a hand down to help the older woman stand. She picked up the ceremonial blade and hefted it into place on her back. “I want to introduce you to the sisters here. Then we can go meet with your tribe and see what we can work out between us. I think this could be a good thing for everyone involved.”
Eponin took Gabrielle in a hug which startled her, but one that she returned in full measure. “Despite everything, Gabrielle, I am selfishly glad you’re here.”
“Me too, Eponin. Me too.”
The moonlight was bright enough to see by even without the enhanced senses Xena had developed since her separation from Gabrielle. She was glad they only tended to kick in when she was on the hunt or in some sort of perceived danger. She was fairly certain the scents and sounds that assaulted her would drive her mad if she was forced to endure them continuously.
Her guardians made no sound and since they were downwind of their prey the trio were able to walk almost right into the herd.
The buffalo were milling together, lowing softly as they settled in for the night. Xena noticed that a small commotion at the back of the herd and focused her attention on it. The panther crept forward while the fox remained at Xena’s side. Still some distance from the disturbance, the black cat stopped and turned its gaze back to the fox. Without a sound, the fox slunk forward and Xena moved without thought to follow.
The two animals stopped again as Xena slowed to take in the tableau before her. Directly in front of her, though still some distance away, was a white buffalo. Aside from the fact that it was a beautiful animal whose hide she admired, the animal was obviously an outcast and was continually being butted and chased by the larger buffalo around it. Xena raised her bow as the white buffalo was herded her way by both the herd and the panther that had crept up behind it.
Almost negligently, Xena let an arrow fly straight and true into the buffalo’s eye. It tottered for a moment then fell over, causing a shifting of movement in the herd until the panther let out a roar. Then they loped steadily away from the fallen animal to relative safety.
Xena walked to the dying buffalo, reaching out two fingers to its neck and ending its torment. The she set about neatly skinning and draining it, being sure to take her fill before bleeding the animal out. The panther and the fox sat on either side, patiently waiting for her to finish before procuring their own meal.
Xena couldn’t help but be amazed at the odd behavior of the pair and she deliberately cut a portion of the meat for them to share and set it aside from the rest of the creature. She continued to watch as the panther carefully checked the selection she’d laid out for them; then the cat gently nudged the sustenance towards its mate. The fox delicately raised a morsel to its mouth and began gnawing before the panther took a bite, keeping a watchful eye on the warrior.
Xena shook her head to clear it. Such behavior was completely unnatural for these animals and she couldn’t help but wonder if she’d gone too long without feeding to make her hallucinate such odd conduct in the two natural predators. She blinked again, but the image didn’t go away; the cat and fox continued to eat the piece of meat she’d given them, the panther making sure the fox got its fill before scooping up the remainder in its strong jaws.
Xena turned her attention back to the buffalo, discarding the entrails and realizing she had a dilemma. There was no way she could manage to carry the remainder of the animal back to the makeshift village and waste was unacceptable.
She rooted around in her mind for a solution, finally deciding she was completely out of her mind with what she ended up with. She turned to the panther, which looked back at her with singularly intelligent eyes.
“I don’t suppose you’d watch over the rest of this for me til I get back?” she queried rhetorically as she hefted a large quantity of meat in her hands. “Well, I needed a good workout tonight I suppose,” she muttered to herself as she took off back towards the village at a run.
It was very late and the camp had already settled in for its night rest when she arrived. Hotassa and a few of the other women hurried from their homes as the sound of running footsteps thundered through the compound. They looked at Xena in surprise when she approached blood covered and hands filled with buffalo meat.
Hotassa accepted the burden Xena carried, calling out instructions to the women who stood around staring. Soon, the camp was all a-bustle with activity and several of the women accompanied Xena back to the prairie to see if anything remained of what she had left behind.
It is difficult to say who was more shocked when the small troupe arrived back where the buffalo was. The panther and the fox circled the animal in opposite directions, intent on keeping any threat at bay. When Hotassa approached, the cat hissed and tensed to spring. Xena held the woman back by a touch on her arm and the older woman halted. Xena walked forward and the panther hesitated, studying the warrior for a long moment before resuming its place by the fox’s side.
The women were amazed and began chattering among themselves at the unusual behavior the two were exhibiting. Xena stepped forward and began to gather the remaining meat for the women to carry back to the camp, then she lifted the heavy hide herself. It was then that Hotassa got her first good look at the hide.
“Évó’kómo hotoa’e. Ma’heono hova! Zee-nah epeva’e notaxe,” she stated emphatically, falling back into her own language and lowering her head in respect. Xena’s brow creased in confusion and she cursed herself once again for not having a complete grasp on this language yet.
She noted that all the women had lowered their eyes before her and when she stopped and took Hotassa’s elbow, everyone stopped and waited. Xena took a deep breath and motioned them forward. One of the younger, braver souls glanced up in her direction and she made distinct shooing motions and commanded, “GO!” The women scurried off to take care of the buffalo meat she had supplied. Hotassa remained with her eyes still on the ground, trying to come up with words they would both understand, because she could feel the irritation emanating from the tall figure before her.
Xena rubbed her face and Hotassa felt compassion for the frustration she knew Xena was feeling. They had made great strides in communicating, but there were still times, like now, when they forgot and fell into their old ways. They had to put some thought into speaking the same language.
Hotassa took Xena’s hand and drew her back to the hide that once again rested on the ground. She stroked it gently. “White.”
Xena nodded. “Yeah, it is. It’s unusual, but it was being abused by the rest of the herd.” She stopped speaking at the confusion in Hotassa’s eyes. Xena was unused to having to justify a kill and it showed in her tone of voice.
“Zee-nah, great hunter. Sacred,” motioning to the hide. Xena didn’t see it that way at all. She had merely taken pity on a creature that had no real hope.
“Look, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to kill a sacred animal. It just seemed like the right thing to do.” She didn’t add that both the herd and the panther had cut it out of the pack as though giving it to her.
Hotassa shook her head. She was fairly certain Xena was not understanding the honor she’d been given. Instead she motioned towards the two animals that had taken sentinel positions on either side. “Zee-nah strong seo’ôtse.”
Xena rubbed her face again. “I’m not sure I understand, Hotassa, but I’m not sure I want to either.”
Hotassa merely nodded. There wasn’t a way to convey what Xena needed to know without some help from her mate the shaman and that would have to wait until the men returned from war. In the meantime, it appeared as though Xena had acquired two rather formidable mascots and the animals padded along silently beside her as the women made their way back to camp.
Xena blinked in surprise at the abundance of late-night activity still obvious around the village. Women scurried to and fro setting up smoking fires to cure the meat; another small group was tending to the bones, preparing them to be converted into tools and weapons needed in the community. Still a third was building a large fire in the pit before Hotassa’s dwelling and readying a cauldron of water for heating.
Xena understood Hotassa without words when she slipped a cake of soap and a thin piece of cloth into the warrior’s hand and motioned her towards the spring. Xena was happy to comply with the unspoken command as the scent of blood on her person was keeping her on a razor edge she preferred to avoid when surrounded by so many people.
She took a few moments to scrub the dried blood from her hands and arms as well as her clothing. Then she let her mind drift as she relaxed and rinsed. Inevitably, it centered on Gabrielle and the many times they had shared a lake or stream and the now familiar ached of loneliness welled in her soul once more.
“Oh, Gabrielle,” whispered on a prayer to the wind.
Xena took a few minutes to compose herself before exiting the water and dressing. Then she moved back to the mostly silent camp.
In the short time she’d been gone, the women had completed their preliminary tasks for curing the different parts of the buffalo Xena had slain and had returned to their homes for a bit of rest before morning was upon them again.
Xena crossed to her home, noting with interest that the panther and fox now lay curled up together in front of the flap. She shook her head in bemused wonder and crossed the threshold. “Wonder what Gabrielle would have made of the two of you,” she muttered to herself before settling herself in with the now clean hide and beginning her work to cure it.
Several days passed before the men returned. A few were missing, but thankfully a majority came home though there were more wounded than not. Among the worst wounded was the shaman and without a word, Xena moved to help him. His son Kya stepped between them, intent on keeping a woman and especially *this* woman away from his father. After her public refusal of his advances, Kya had done his best to put her in her place.
Unfortunately for him, he wasn’t nearly as capable as he imagined himself to be and Xena constantly thwarted his attempts to contain her.
Now she raised a hand to physically move him out of her way, the intensity in her eyes making it clear to all present that he was not going to stop her.
The words were softly spoken, but the meaning was clear even to Xena’s untrained ears. She cocked an eyebrow at the young man, waiting for him to comply with his father’s request. He glared at her but moved out of her way. A passing thought of wondering why his ritual had brought Xena to them crossed his mind again and he shook his head as he stepped aside.
Xena waited until the shaman beckoned her closer, then she knelt and began to assess his injuries. He lay quietly and let her work, though she could see the questions in his eyes. She didn’t have time to worry about them immediately since she was concentrating on cleaning and binding his wounds. She patted his arm and stood to move on to the next warrior in need of healing. His hand on hers caused her to hesitate with a question in her eyes.
He motioned to the two animals that now sat beside the warrior. They had been patiently sitting together by one side of her doorway and had stepped between her and his son at the young man’s first movement towards Xena. “Nanose’hame, ma’êhoohe. Tosa’e? Tone?”
She understood what he was asking and motioned to the vast plain beyond the encampment. Then Hotassa knelt beside him and wiped his brow.
“A’e,” she assured him and he nodded and released Xena to continue her work. The shaman’s eyes closed as he let his body relax into a healing sleep.
One by one Xena applied her healing skills to the warriors and slowly they allowed her to care for them. Many of the wounds were relatively minor, for which everyone was thankful and just before midday she finished treating those who needed it. Then she retreated to her dwelling and out the back in an effort to get away and find some peace.
Meanwhile, the women had begun to tell their mates what had transpired on the plain three nights previous. The men sat in awed disbelief at the story that unfolded and many expressed skepticism at the possibility. Hotassa hushed them all by showing them the white hide that sat curing in front of Xena’s home. She promised to give them the whole story when her husband awakened and they accepted that edict with only minor grumbling.
Xena exited her home quietly and was down the path before the conversation got too embarrassing. She still didn’t understand all the words, but she understood enough and got the tonal inflection easily enough to know exactly who and what the conversation was about. It didn’t take much for her to decide she needed a long walk.
She found herself moving away from the village and into the small scrub hills they had settled near while the men had been gone. She sighed. This place was so foreign, so different from home and it made her ache for the comfort of trees and hills and the familiarity of a cool breeze on her face. Xena wanted to go home.
Without realizing it, her steps became faster and before she knew it, she was running full out. She wasn’t sure if she was running to something or running away from something, so she stopped thinking and stopped feeling and just ran.
A stitch in her side finally made her slow to a walk and she noted with some surprise that the sun was more than halfway to the horizon. She shook her head in disgust.
“Brilliant, Xena. It’s gonna be real late before you get back to the village. Gabrielle would be furious if she was here.”
That thought caused her knees to unbuckle as a flash of a previously hidden memory exploded across her mind. The look of anguished betrayal on Gabrielle’s face was heartbreaking and Xena allowed herself to drop to the ground as the last events of her life paraded forth in her mind’s eye.
“Oh, Gabrielle…. I am so, SO sorry….” And Xena sat lost in tormented thought reliving a decision she could no longer comprehend until the moon was high in the sky.
It was actually the feeling of warmth curled in her lap that brought Xena out of the haze she was in. She looked down, somewhat unsurprised to see the fox curled into a small ball on her legs. More surprising was the fact that the panther sat unmoving next to but not touching its mate. Xena smiled down at them sadly, tears still sitting on her lashes unspent.
She sat lightly stroking the fox’s fur while the panther kept sentinel over both of them, though Xena did note with some amusement that the panther was very aware of her actions as much as it was of the environment that surrounded them.
Xena lifted the fox from her lap and set it gently beside the cat who gazed at her with watchful eyes. “You two,” she said as she rose to her feet and dusted herself off, “oughta be fairly close to your home. It might be best if you head back there. But thanks for keeping me company.”
She looked like she wanted to say more, but for the life of her, Xena could no more articulate the feelings in her heart right then than she could fly to the moon. She was sure a lot of that had to do with her exhaustion, both physical and emotional. She felt very much like her world had spun completely off its axis and totally out of control and she was at a loss to know what to do to get things back on track. Having these two animals nearby sharing a bond that was as strong and familiar as what she had shared with Gabrielle as a constant reminder of what she had lost simply made it worse.
It was a sweet pain, but it was agonizing nonetheless and she had no desire to be a martyr to it… especially now that she knew the truth. Part of the truth anyway and Xena knew beyond a doubt that the vicious death she now recalled with stunning clarity lay totally at her feet. Now it was critical for her to discover what sort of afterlife she had fallen into, because it was time to see what god she could manipulate into sending her home… and back into Gabrielle’s arms.
Xena had started walking while processing these thoughts and she came to with a start, realizing that the fox and panther were casually strolling along beside her.
“Don’t you two have somewhere to be?”
They gazed at her compassionately and the intelligence she saw in both their eyes nearly unnerved her. Without words, she understood that they considered themselves her guardians and her shoulders sagged in defeat.
“All right, c’mon. We’ve got a long trip back to the village.” They started back together at a walk while Xena’s mind turned to serious contemplation of finding her way back to life.
It was sunrise when Xena and her two companions made it back to the encampment and she noted the odd sense of reverence in the glances now cast her way by the various individuals she passed on her way to her home. She snatched up her towel and went to the small creek to wash, then slipped back into her teepee unnoticed and settled down for a bit of rest. She had a lot of things to consider.
Xena’s very first thought upon waking was of Gabrielle, but it had been that way since that very first night outside of Amphipolis if she was honest enough to admit it to herself and here in this place, it was easy to be that honest with herself. She sat for long moments undisturbed as her mind began sorting through the puzzle it had been given. Something just didn’t make sense.
A light knocking at the doorway caused blue eyes to flitter open and she called out, “Come.”
Hotassa stuck her head in the flap, a look of relief crossing her face when she saw that Xena was awake and alert. She offered forth the steaming bowl in her hands.
“Mesêhestôtse?” she asked. She had a look though that reminded Xena of Cyrene. She was fairly certain if she refused, Hotassa would insist to the point of feeding the warrior herself to insure that Xena ate. Instead, Xena received the food with a graceful nod of her head and a slight smile.
“Nea’eše,” Xena said and dug into the meal with relish. She hadn’t realized how hungry she was until the first taste crossed her lips. Then she began to devour the stew rapidly.
“Enovahe,” Hotassa said with a chuckle. “Slow.”
Xena chewed a little more slowly and swallowed the mouthful she had before wiping her mouth with her hand. “Sorry,” she mumbled. “Hungry.”
It finally occurred to Xena what had been niggling at her about this afterlife… this place was far closer to what LIFE had been to her than any other afterlife she’d experienced. Tartarus had been torture on the cross; in Hell she’d been a demon bent on destruction. In Heaven she’d had been an archangel, though she didn’t remember having needs or desires like Michael and Lucifer seemed to suffer from. Probably wasn’t there long enough… she thought with a sneer, remembering clearly how THAT little escapade had been the beginning of a hellacious year for her and Gabrielle that had nearly ripped them to shreds.
Valhalla was a little different, but that had more to do with being a Valkyrie because she hadn’t actually been dead in that afterlife. Since she only helped bring Odin’s chosen warriors into their place of eternal reward very briefly, she really didn’t know much about that afterlife. Especially since her true focus had been on obtaining the Rheingold by any means necessary.
That left Elysia, but her experience of that afterlife had only been brief glimpses. Still, it was nothing like what she had in this place. This place reminded her so much of Greece and Gabrielle. It reminded her of home.
There was no peace and tranquility here. People fought and lived and…. Did they die? Xena couldn’t say for sure, not having actually witnessed a human death in this place. Certainly they were wounded. There was hunger and sickness. Xena shook her head. No, this wasn’t like any afterlife she’d ever experienced or even possibly imagined.
Her focus turned inward toward the burning she always felt now that grew stronger the longer she was without bloodshed of some kind. Her bloodlust had always been sated by fighting and killing or by the occasional assertive lovemaking with Gabrielle.
She smiled… she had been surprised and oddly pleased by Gabrielle’s aggressiveness the first time the bard had drawn blood. It had been completely unexpected and more satisfying than she’d ever imagined something like that could be. For all her prowess, it was actually a new experience for Xena and on the rare occasion it happened, it had added an incredible dimension of feeling between them.
Xena shook her head again. This line of thought was taking her body places she really didn’t want it to go right now and it was muddling her thinking. The truth was, if this was an afterlife, the burning should be gone, shouldn’t it? At least if she was being rewarded. And her ability to sate it should be gone if she was being punished. It made no sense.
The only logical conclusion she could come to was that this WASN’T an afterlife. But if that was the case… where was she? Her language difficulties with the native people troubled her no end. She’d never found it difficult before to learn a new tongue and now when it was the key to her figuring out the convoluted puzzle she seemed to be living, she was having difficulty with even the basics.
Maybe this *is* an afterlife and I am slowly supposed to lose my mind as punishment….
Xena raked her hands through her hair. She was going to have to learn this impossible language… that’s all there was to it. Though the people were somewhat reluctant to share their words with her, she couldn’t keep pointing at things or using the pinch to get her point across.
She’d been lucky, though. Her two mascots had provided a measure of respect she needed and a leeway she’d appreciated beyond words. Once she’d put the pinch on the young shaman Kya, interested suitors had approached her much more warily. A young woman and two warriors, one younger, one older had tried to make contact with her to no avail. None could advance past the two animals and when Xena made it clear that they were complying with her express wishes, she was left to her solitude.
The women as a group still welcomed her to whatever activity they were busy with, but for the most part, Xena did her own thing, content to hunt for herself and to exercise her warrior skills outside the bounds of the encampment. The warriors still weren’t sure what to make of the woman who had fallen among them that exhibited the skills of warrior, healer and shaman.
So now she decided to see if she could make headway into communicating with the people who for now, in this place were her family and friends. The sooner she could talk to them, the sooner she could get some answers to at least some of the questions that weighed heavily on her heart and mind. Somewhere out there was the solution she needed to find her way home.
When she stepped from her dwelling the following morning, her face bore a grim determination that would not easily be denied. So it took her a few minutes to realize that the camp’s perception of her had changed radically, literally overnight.
Eyes dropped now instead of meeting her own and only Hotassa spoke directly to her. The older woman brought Xena some food to break her fast, then started to move away to allow the warrior the privacy her sudden change in tribal standing demanded. Xena put a hand out to stop her, hoping Hotassa would answer some questions.
“Hotassa, what’s going on? What’s changed?” Xena motioned to the village around her. The women regarded her differently and the men now made eye contact, something they had been loathe to do previously.
“Zee-nah, notaxe… warrior. Ma’aataemeo’o evesetano notaxe ševe. Learn path.”
“Learn…?” Confusion washed over Xena’s face. “Why?”
Simple, direct and to the point. Even Hotassa would understand the meaning even if the words were still difficult for them both.
“Nanose’hame, ma’êhoohe ehvestâhem Zee-nah. Mets strong ma’heono.” She paused and tried to phrase it for Xena to easily understand. “Animals… strong guides. Powerful spirits.”
Hotassa looked as frustrated as Xena felt, but the warrior nodded her head. She was fairly confident she understood exactly what Hotassa was implying and she glanced to the fox and panther that reclined sedately on either side of her. Inexplicably, she felt Gabrielle’s love surrounding her and for the first time in more than a moon she felt…. It was as though the bard had reached beyond the grave and provided Xena with the tools she needed to survive.
The feeling was very brief, but it was a real as anything she’d ever felt in her life and Xena took comfort from the fact that even if she was dead, Gabrielle was looking out for her. And she determined again to do whatever it took to find her bard and make things right for them again.
Hotassa waited quietly, having watched Xena’s focus grow introspective. She wasn’t quite prepared for the intensity of the stare that turned her way when Xena’s gaze turned her way.
“Heehe’e… êstse. You have a lot to teach and I have a lot to learn. Then I have a bard to find.”
She stood and took Hotassa’s arm, gesturing that she was ready to meet with the tribal shaman and begin her training. Without a word, the two animals stretched and rose, padding silently along beside them. The entire camp watched as the injured shaman gestured to her and for the first time, a woman warrior was welcomed at his fire and in their tribe.
Days became weeks and weeks turned into months. The tribe settled for the winter and it made Xena antsy, though it gave her plenty of time to learn the language and customs of what had become her extended family.
She had passed their warrior tests with ease and had proven her prowess as both a hunter and a healer. She was a welcome addition to both war and hunting parties, though they had yet to let her lead either.
The animals never strayed far from her and in the beginning, negated any threat they felt impinged upon her space. It was only after Xena proved herself to both them and the tribe that they allowed her to fight her own battles, though there were several instances when they did watch her back… much as Gabrielle had. Xena was amazed at how well the bard had chosen her spirit guides. Separately, they reminded her of the two of them… so much of them reflected both their traits and personalities. Together they reminded Xena of Gabrielle and though she still could neither feel nor sense the bard’s presence, she drew a measure of peace in her memories.
The language continued to frustrate the warrior and she had to wonder if her difficulties with it lay in her desperate need to understand and communicate with the people who might hold the answers to her questions. Many were the times that the aggravation drove her to the hunt and after a successful feed, she would return sated and settled and able to focus her concentration on the task at hand again.
In many ways she was marking time, but time, no matter how slowly it appears to be moving, does move steadily forward and it was a bit of surprise for Xena to realize that spring had come.
Finally, as the days became steadily warmer, Xena made up her mind to leave the tribe and strike out on her own across the vast plains. Somewhere out there laid the answers she sought and she was determined to find them. She was comfortable enough with the language now to be able to get by and she figured she could pick up more in her travels. It was, after all, how she’d learned many of the tongues she now knew. And more and more her heart urged her to begin her hunt for Gabrielle.
Before she’d made up her mind to leave, a rider came into camp announcing that war had been declared by another tribe… the tribe that had nearly decimated them the previous summer. The shaman stared at Xena and by look alone made her the head of the war party that would seek retribution for the damage they had inflicted.
Xena sighed… she didn’t want this… not now. She had a bigger greater good to concern herself with. She needed to find Gabrielle and reunite with her. But even as she opened her mouth to refuse, her head nodded her acceptance. Even in this screwed-up, oddball afterlife she’d found herself in, she knew that either she took care of the problem sooner or later. And in this case, sooner was better because it meant she would have more time later for her own personal quest.
Several clans of her tribe showed up, though some balked at first of following a woman warrior. But Xena’s tribe contained the nation’s shaman and after he spoke, the male warriors fell reluctantly into line.
None could say how happy they were with his choice, because she led them to a total and complete victory over their enemies. And though some did die and more were injured, they had redeemed themselves in both their eyes and the eyes of the enemy.
Xena spent a couple days tending the wounded and the few who developed sickness before she prepared to leave. Hotassa noted her packed bag and nodded in understanding. She’d known Xena was searching for something the village could not give her.
The shaman came to Xena’s dwelling… an almost unheard of honor. Usually he summoned those to whom he wished to speak to his own fire. Xena stepped from her teepee at his knock and they sat down to talk.
The shaman blessed her and chided her. Told of dangers seen and unseen and cautioned her to be careful. He reminded her that they were her family and she was welcome back at any time she felt her journey was over, or even if it was just to visit. Finally he thanked her for the things she had taught them and her willingness to learn their ways as well. Then he touched her shoulders and kissed her forehead like the daughter he’d never had and sent her on her way.
Hotassa came by and offered food for her travel, as did many of the women of the tribe. One or two of the bolder ones assured her they would continue their staff practice and reminded her they would be waiting for lessons when she returned to them. As she gathered up her bags to leave, each and every warrior took a moment to say a parting word and it was with mixed emotions that Xena finally hit the trail.
With her companions by her side, though, Xena found she was less lonely than she expected to be and as the encampment faded from view, she took to her search for Gabrielle with boundless energy and determination. Nothing was going to stop her from finding her bard and finding a way for them to be together again. Whatever it took, whatever sacrifice needed to be made, it was time for *them* to be the greater good.
Gabrielle came back to her surroundings when the young man playing at being a purser brought a lemonade out and set it on the small table at her elbow. She thanked him with an absent smile and dismissed him, returning her attention back to her journals and the memories that lay therein.
So many years, she thought and so many friends come and gone. We’re not the only immortals in the world. Do you know that Xena? Have you even discovered your own immortality yet? You haven’t been in this time very long and I worry about you… I worry about us. Do you remember me, Xena? Do you remember us? Will you still love me when I find you again? Because I will find you and then we will find a way home together. I’m tired and I’m ready to go home… to you and to the Greece we shared together years ago.
Gabrielle sighed and put those thoughts out of her mind. She had a tendency to brood more often these days, but I suppose almost eighteen hundred years of separation from your other half will make a person unreasonable from time to time.
She had to chuckle. Unreasonable. There had been several times when the loneliness had been overwhelming and the sheer magnitude of what her soul bore nearly drove her to madness. It was in those moments, in the darkest times of her life that she felt the separation most harshly. It was then that the doubts assailed her and made rational thought nearly impossible and her feelings….
Gods, if it hadn’t been for Aphrodite and her constant friendship, I surely would have lost my mind… several times over. It was nice to know I wasn’t completely alone and being reminded later that I wasn’t the only one like me….
Gabrielle shook her head to clear her thoughts more forcefully. She reopened the journal, her eyes searching until they landed on the first time she’d gone to Olympus for a respite.
Dear Xena, (it read)
A plague has come to the Amazons and it is beyond my knowledge and experience. It is also beyond the best efforts of our healers and those of our tribal neighbors. It is like no plague we have seen in the almost three hundred seasons we have been in this land and Buitu, the headman for the tribes says it is nothing they have encountered in recorded history.
Bless his heart, he almost said it as though it were a question when we talked since we both know I would remember anything like this happening.
I have to say, both my Amazons and the People have been mostly accepting of my status as an immortal being. Perhaps because I leave them to live there lives here and do not interfere or participate with them unless invited to do so.
Now that this plague has come, I have not only been asked to help, but representatives from both sides are pleading with me for a solution. Unfortunately, I believe that solution lies outside my bounds here. I will have to find a way to travel back to the outside world and visit some of the great libraries, if they still exist. Who knows what has happened in the three hundred years we have been in this new land?
Even Aphrodite hasn’t been able to find us… or she has forgotten about me.
Gabrielle sighed as she blew on the ink to dry it before closing her diary and packing it away. On the morrow, she and a very small, select group of warriors would set out for the boats and would then sail away towards what she hoped was Greece. She had spent many nights since their arrival in this wild land studying the stars and she believed with a little luck she could get them home. Well, not home to them any more, but we should make it to Greece in a reasonable amount of time.
She wondered again briefly what had happened to Aphrodite that the goddess had not visited her once. Then her mind returned to the many friends she had cared for and buried in this place.
Gabrielle let her thoughts guide her footsteps and in the late afternoon sunlight, she made her way to the small graveyard just outside the village, remembering when it had first been set aside for their dead.
The People had been horrified at the thought of burning human flesh and the Amazons compromised. They had been taught the People’s ways of preservation and then had buried their dead standing up, so that their spirits could quickly and easily ascend to the Amazon Land of the Dead. A small memorial pyre was built atop the grave that burned brightly for three days, guiding the spirit on its journey and watched over by the tribe. At the end of three days, the ashes were gathered into a small container engraved with the sister’s name and placed just behind the burial site.
She walked slowly through the rows, remembering each and every person that was buried there and how they had died.
She frowned as she realized that a few people had suffered from similar symptoms to those that now seemed to be slowly killing the Nation. It wasn’t often and until the last few moons, no one had died, but the indicators were almost the same.
Gabrielle set the thought aside, promising herself more thought on it during the trip to Greece. She would have plenty of time to consider all the implications later. For now, she was approaching the oldest part of the cemetery and she paused as she remembered the old friends that had made the journey with her from Greece… Cyane, Varia, Hilda and the many other sisters who had passed on to their reward.
Though she missed and mourned all those who died, it was these first ones, the ones she’d actually allowed to be friends, that Gabrielle missed the most.
Finally she reached the grave that represented Eponin. The People had allowed her body to remain in preservation for three days while the Amazons burned a fire for her before they buried her in their own cemetery. As a wife of the headman, she was accorded special honor because she had never forgotten that she was still an Amazon and the People respected that.
Now she sat down at the marker that indicated Eponin’s resting place.
“Hello, old friend,” Gabrielle said softly. “It’s been a while since we spoke last and I’m afraid it’s gonna be even longer before we have the opportunity here again.” She drew a deep breath and continued. “Something is killing the Nation slowly and I am going to go back to Greece and see if I can find something in the libraries there to help.”
Gabrielle was so wrapped up in her thoughts that she did not see the spirits of her sisters gather round. It was something she never saw, because they never revealed themselves to her as Ephiny once had. But they always came out to listen whenever she sat to have a chat, usually with Eponin.
“Hopefully the libraries will still be there,” she muttered, remembering the destruction she had seen in her short mortal lifetime in Greece and knowing that conquerors were rarely careful to keep knowledge of other cultures, no matter how hard learned the lessons of that knowledge were.
“Maybe we will try Egypt first,” Gabrielle continued. “It’s closer and Queen Cleopatra was quite proud of her library… justly so,” remembering her awe at the grandiose building on their first visit. “Do you know… once we got past our differences, Cleopatra asked if I would archive a few scrolls there. I was surprised, really, since I was a foreigner, even though we were the Queen’s guests.” Gabrielle chuckled at the memory. “Then Cleopatra explained to me that they collected ideas and knowledge from the entire known world.”
Gabrielle sat quietly for a time before nodding her head in decision. “I think we will try Egypt first. It’s much close than Greece and the diversity in thinking that we will find at the Library in Alexandria should more than equal what I could find in Athens.” She looked at the small urn manifest with Eponin’s name. “Thanks, Eponin. Even now talking with you helps clear my mind. I miss you, my friend. Tell the sisters….” she broke off. “Well, they know I miss them too. Keep a watch out over the Amazons. They still need the guiding spirits of their ancestors.”
Gabrielle remained where she was until the sun hit the horizon, then stood and dusted herself off. She walked to the edge of the glade, then turned and whispered a prayer over the three hundred years of graves that remained behind. Then she left at a brisk pace to find the Captain of her ship. There were some changes in their route that needed to be addressed.
The spirits of the Amazons waited until Gabrielle was halfway back to the village before they re-emerged in the glade.
“Do you think it’s serious?” from Varia, referring to the plague that Gabrielle had referenced.
“Well, it is serious enough to warrant Gabrielle’s leaving what has been her home for the last three hundred cycles,” Eponin commented. “We’ll keep an eye on things, though I do think it is probably in *Gabrielle’s* best interests.”
“How so?” from Hilda as they each took seats on the ground in a circle.
“Because,” said Ephiny as she stepped from the mist, “Gabrielle is alone here. And she is reminded of her immortality daily because of the reverence the Nation bestows on her. Not that she doesn’t deserve it,” Ephiny added hastily as she held up a hand to stop the protests. “But she was never comfortable being Queen. How can she be content to be regarded from a distance with such awe but with not a friend to be counted among them?”
Ephiny looked at Eponin and smiled. “Remember that young, friendly kid we met so many years ago?”
Eponin nodded and Ephiny cast her gaze around the clearing once more. “Gabrielle has been without real friends here for many seasons – partly by her own choice and partly because no one is quite sure how to treat her.”
“I agree,” Cyane said. “It was hard at first when she first shared her secret, until we realized she was still the same person and still our Queen.”
“She has fulfilled the prophecy and led the Nation to greatness once more,” Yakut remarked. “I think she is entitled to a reprieve.”
Heads all around nodded in agreement.
“It is decided then,” said Melosa. “We will keep a watch over the Nation and Gabrielle and hope that she finds what she is searching for very soon.”
“Xena better hope Gabrielle finds what she’s looking for pretty soon,” Solari replied with a chuckle. “I’m not sure the Warrior Princess will be able to take on the Amazon Queen if it takes too long. Xena won’t know what hit her.”
With that, the rest of the group winced in sympathy for the warrior, knowing it for the truth. And they had to chuckle at the image that truth produced for each of them. Then the spirits began to return to their places of rest and readiness, crossing through the mists back into their eternal home.
Gabrielle was excited by the time she reached the village. She was confident the Library of Alexandria would have what she needed. It would simply be a matter of finding it. And the women who were accompanying her would be an asset in the search. They had been chosen from many volunteers for their knowledge as well as their sailing skills.
It was hoped that they would be able to make a short stop at the Sinhales Islands that had been their original goal to see if perhaps there were more members of their Nation who might want to join their sisters and return to the new home that had been established so very far away.
The small crew was preparing the last things that needed to be taken care of when Gabrielle strode into the village. Her presence was so unusual in the village anymore that everyone froze and then fell to a kneeling position.
Gabrielle stood for a moment with her hands on her hips just shaking her head. For whatever reason, the Amazons couldn’t get passed her title, to say nothing of that whole immortality thing. She suddenly realized that despite the circumstances warranting her departure from the Nation, she was looking forward to it. At least no one in ‘civilization’ knew her secret and she would be treated much like anyone else. And she looked forward to that more than anything.
“Rise, ladies. You have better things to do than kneel at my feet, I’m sure.” Without missing a beat, Gabrielle turned to the woman who would be the captain of the Amazon ship. “Demetria, do you have a minute? We need to alter our route.”
The younger woman frowned. “My Queen? Are you sure? We checked and rechecked everything you gave us. I’m certain all is as it should be.”
“It would be if we were still going to Greece. Plans have just changed. C’mon.”
“But….” Demetria sputtered before following her rapidly disappearing Queen into the council hut.
“That makes perfect sense, Queen Gabrielle. I’m sorry I questioned….”
Gabrielle held up a hand to forestall the apology. “Don’t be Demetria. Immortality doesn’t make me perfect. It just gives me longer to practice.” She smiled and the captain couldn’t stop the return smile that blossomed on her face. “Otherwise, I would have thought of this first.”
“Well, I’m glad you thought of it now. It will shave months off our trip out and back. I’m glad we are taking two ships though. Inya will be able to check the island and meet us in Egypt which will cut some time off as well.”
“Anxious to be back already, Captain?”
“Yes, my Queen. I’m a little nervous and I so want us to be successful.” Gabrielle remembered that Demetria had lost her baby sister to the plague fourteen moons prior.
“I understand, Demetria, more than you know. We’ll be as quick as we can, I promise. The Nation will get our best.”
“My Queen,” Demetria answered seriously, dropping to one knee in front of a startled Gabrielle. “Despite the fact that this Nation has not always done right by you, you have never failed to give us your best when asked for it.”
Gabrielle scrubbed her face, glad she was already sitting down. “Demetria, get up please. You don’t need to kneel in front of me.”
“The fact is the Nation hasn’t always been first with me and there have been many times that I decided what was best for us was for me not to be an active part of life as an Amazon.”
“Yes, but every time we’ve needed you, you’ve responded. You came and did what you could, just like now.”
Gabrielle smiled and shook her head. “Nothing is gonna change your mind on this, is it, Captain?”
“No, my Queen,” came the reply with a smile.
“Then I will capitulate to the argument in favor of an early night. We want to get an early start in the morning.”
“Indeed we do, Queen Gabrielle.”
They exited the council hut and the Captain walked with Gabrielle the short distance to the cliff side. “Good night, my Queen.”
“Good night, Demetria. I’ll see you at daybreak.”
The Captain waited until Gabrielle reached the opening of the cave she called home before turning and making her way back to her hut. Even though Gabrielle was an immortal and beyond the need of such protection, the Amazons continued to extend her the courtesy of an escort whenever they could manage to get away with it. Gabrielle acceded to their wishes on this point, much as she did to their referring to her by title mostly because it was a position of honor with them. It didn’t hurt her really, though it did cause her some private eye-rolling and it gave them a sense of keeping to a code that had been lain down by their sisters long before even Gabrielle’s time. It was easy when she reminded herself she was merely keeping traditions alive.
Gabrielle entered the cave with a mixture of relief and trepidation. In the years she had been here, this had become home as much as anything she had known in her brief life as a mortal, except Xena. And tomorrow, she was leaving home again for parts unknown, though she did have high hopes to reach Egypt and eventually Greece.
For though the women accompanying her didn’t yet know it, Gabrielle expected to find a cure and send them on their way back here. She herself planned to stay for a bit longer if it could be managed. She needed some time for herself, in a place where no one knew who she was or expected her to make the hard decisions all the time. Gabrielle’s very soul was tired and knowing that she had centuries more to pass before her solitary state would change did nothing but make things worse.
She looked around the cavern thoroughly once more, insuring there was no foodstuff left to rot. Things were neatly put away and she smiled. She would always have this place when she returned, but for too long now she had been settled in one place and her life had fallen into a rut. It was time to see what else the world had to offer and her first stop was to find a cure for what was ailing the Amazon Nation.
They made good time, not surprisingly given the amount of time and care spent pouring over the maps and charts they’d made in the years following their initial voyage. Though their new homeland was relatively uncharted as far as Western civilization was concerned, Gabrielle and the original captains had invested a lot of effort into remembering as many details as they possibly could.
Gabrielle spent many nights studying the stars, insuring that their memories had not been faulty and Demetria helped chart the distances they were traveling to allow for even more accurate maps to be made when they returned home.
When the stars took on their old familiarity, Gabrielle climbed into the crows nest and wept silent tears at the memories the well -known patterns evoked. For the first time in many years she held a conversation with Xena out loud, knowing the warrior couldn’t hear or respond, but feeling somewhat better to fall into their proverbial star chasing argument. When she was done, she climbed down and slipped below to her cabin, recording her thoughts and feelings.
It was something she’d always done as a matter of course, but with Xena’s disappearance, it had become the best way to communicate with the warrior. The Amazons respected her privacy and never invaded any of her writings. But they tended to wonder about her a little bit when she talked to Xena as though she was still standing beside her. So her diary became her refuge and the one safe place she could still talk to Xena and anything… and everything.
As the trip continued, Gabrielle found herself antsy to return to the known and loved. The logical part of her mind understood that after three hundred cycles, nothing would be as she remembered it… twenty-five years in the ice caves had taught her that lesson quite clearly. But her heart only knew that Greece had been home more than any place she’d been in her years of travel and she was anxious to see what differences time had wrought on the world she’d grown up in.
About a week out from their arrival at the inlet of the Red Sea, from what they had surmised at any rate, the second ship veered north, headed to the islands that had been their original destination. It was hoped that there might be more Amazons there who would want to return to their new homeland. They were to pick up anyone who wished to join the Nation, then meet Gabrielle and her crew in Alexandria.
Though everyone desired a quick resolution to the problem plaguing the Nation, the Amazons were realistic about the possibility of it taking weeks to find what they needed in the huge library. So it was with a bit of anxiety that they stepped off the ship onto the dock of Alexandria. Then they stood stock still, though for very different reasons.
Gabrielle tried not to breathe in too deeply the smells that always seemed to be prevalent on every dock she’d ever set foot on. Idly she noted the amazing changes that occurred during her absence.
The Amazons were divided in their reaction. Half were fascinated and the other half disdainful. But they all found it intriguing in the extreme and Gabrielle was fairly certain when they returned home, they would be implementing some of the things they bore witness to here.
Gabrielle had resumed the use of her staff as a tool for walking with. Though she still kept up her skill with all the weapons she had mastered, the staff gave comfort to her in a way that none of the others did. Besides, it was an accepted practice for travelers to walk with the aid of a stick. Any of her other weapons would have caused talk and speculation.
Today and for the remainder of this trip, she and the Amazons blended in fairly well. Their leathers had been traded in for a colorful woven material made from a native plant back home. It had taken a bit of persuasion on her part, but Gabrielle had made the women come to see that it was in the best interests of both themselves and the Nation that they be as inconspicuous as possible. They had left Greece to avoid being destroyed. There was no reason to advertise their existence to the world now, especially since they were so well hidden even the gods couldn’t seem to find them.
A pang went through Gabrielle at that thought, but she shuddered and put it out of her mind. She had priorities to take care of first. Then she would go to Greece and see if she still had a friend there in the goddess of love.
She was astonished at the amount of influence Rome seemed to have here. She had hoped, honestly, that Rome would be gone by now. They’d brought nothing but misery and suffering to her and Xena and she wished the world well rid of them. She shrugged. It really didn’t matter so long as they left her and the Amazons alone to get what they came for.
Gabrielle was thankful for the time she’d spent learning both Egyptian and Latin as it made it much easier for her to get around. With few words, she started out for the library and the Amazons gathered their things and followed her.
Gabrielle could feel how impressed the Amazons were with the grandeur of both the city and the library itself despite their efforts at nonchalance. For herself, she could see the years of wear and neglect in places and wondered if she felt her age as plainly as the graceful old buildings did.
With a sigh, she led them up the steps and over to the long marble counter where several well-dressed men and women stood busily working. They looked up at the group’s approach.
“Excuse me,” Gabrielle said in flawless Arabic, gleaned from her time in Egypt and years of subsequent study. “Can you direct us to the medical section?”
The librarians looked the group over as a whole and at the speaker in particular. It was apparent even to the most novice among them that these were neither Egyptian nor Roman nobles and yet the language tripped musically from her lips with the grace of a native. A very rotund man stepped forward and stared, surprised when Gabrielle returned his look measure for measure.
To his amazement, he found an intelligence there he rarely saw and never expected. With a humble nod he said softly, “If you’ll follow me, lady.”
The other librarians followed the small assembly’s progress with wide eyes. Nelium never spoke softly and he never personally led anyone anywhere. His sense of importance as the head of the great library was portrayed in his pompous demeanor and bellowing tones. When the party turned the corner to mount the stairs for the second floor, the librarians looked to one another with delighted grins.
“Never thought to see that happen.”
“Wonder who they are and who the blonde woman is. She has such presence.”
“Yes and nice to see Nelium put in his place without so much as a word.”
“Well,” said the most practical among them. “Best if we get back to work. Regardless of her effect upon him, I doubt seriously it will carry over to us.”
That was easy enough to understand and agree to and they fell back to work with a will.
The man had led them to a quiet alcove, filled with shelf upon shelf of scroll texts. There were several small chairs and tables scattered throughout
Gabrielle and the Amazons looked around slowly and Nelium stood hesitantly watching them before speaking.
“Lady, is there something specific I can help you find, or…?”
Gabrielle turned to him before any of the Amazons could speak. Though his tone was polite, it was not friendly like the men of the People’s tribe when they spoke to the Queen and Gabrielle did not want any misunderstandings to get them thrown from the library before their work was even started.
“My name is Gabrielle,” she offered kindly, extending her hand in greeting.
With evident surprise, the man accepted it and gave her a brief squeeze. “Nelium,” he replied a bit gruffly. He noted suddenly that the women that surrounded him were more than what they seemed. In fact, they could be warriors by their demeanor…. He shook his head. No warrior save those who considered themselves noblemen patronized the library and most tended to stay out of areas that didn’t speak of war.
Gabrielle waited patiently, knowing the man’s thoughts had wandered off. He blinked and returned his attention to her with a light blush. “Apologies, la… Gabrielle.”
“It’s all right, Nelium. Tell me, are the texts in a specific order?”
“They are alphabetized by illness. Do you know what you are looking for?”
The blonde head shook in the negative. “No. Only the symptoms.”
“Oh dear,” the heavy man responded. “It could take you some time then. Would you like some help or would you prefer to do your own research?”
“I think for now we will be fine, Nelium, but thank you.” He bowed and started to depart. “Unless….”
He stopped and turned to face Gabrielle. “Yes?”
“If there is a healer that we could talk to… someone you know of perhaps?”
“I will send out some inquiries, la… Gabrielle. It will probably take a day or two.”
Gabrielle extended her hand. “Thank you, Nelium. I would greatly appreciate it.”
He nodded and took his leave and Gabrielle looked around again to see that the Amazons had already separated to begin their search through what now looked to be an infinite number of scrolls.
It was slow going. Even with all their formal training, the Amazons were encountering all sorts of difficulties reading the various medical texts. For one thing, they were written in a variety of languages, depending on the nationality of the author. For another, most of them were not healers and were not trained to look past the obvious symptoms for the obscure ones that could point to a cure.
Gabrielle spent much of her time making notes for things she wanted to come back for… things that would be useful for the Amazons to have in their healing scrolls. First though, they had to find the cure for the ailment that was slowly killing the Amazon Nation.
The first few days were spent separating the texts into stacks of possibilities. The Amazons and Gabrielle were working from before dawn til after dusk and quickly became a familiar sight in the library.
They were so preoccupied with their search that they failed to notice an increased Roman presence in the city. And then it was too late.
“This is impossible!” Demetria exclaimed half a moon after their arrival in Alexandria. “My Queen, we are never gonna find what we need here! Look at this!” she practically screamed, snatching up a scroll. “This one shows chills and fever, but no paralysis.” She grabbed a second sheet. “This one has swollen, aching joints, but no fatigue or headaches. These,” gesturing to a whole other stack, “have nothing at all we can use!! And we’re not even through the first row of texts!!” Without warning the Captain slumped back down in her seat.
Gabrielle sat quietly letting the words wash over her with a calm facade that belied the turmoil running just below the surface. She wasn’t surprised by the outburst… only by the fact that it had take as long to come to fruition as it had.
The fact was she was feeling the frustration as well and it was aided by the reality that they had become virtual prisoners of the library in their haste to find a cure for their people. For fifteen days they had spent endless candlemarks in this little alcove searching and researching every single scroll shelf by shelf for the information they needed and they had yet to make a real dent in the magnitude of scrolls provided.
The healer that Nelium had sent for had proven less than useful. He had never heard of anything quite like what the Amazons were suffering from and even consulting with his fellows brought little enlightenment. So it made their task doubly daunting, knowing that even the elite of Alexandria were unfamiliar with their cause.
Gabrielle rubbed her forehead, looking for answers that felt like they were just beyond her reach. They pace they had set for themselves was going to kill them without some down time. The hard part was deciding to take it, because even though logic dictated the need, it didn’t lessen the guilt they would feel by ‘wasting time in frivolity’.
Finally she looked up at the anxious faces surrounding her and blew out a breath. “All right, everyone. Mark your places and leave things where they are.”
She waited until everyone had complied and was looking at her expectantly once more. Gabrielle stood from her place and picked up her journal, then began to make her way down the stairs. The Amazons followed as a matter of course with looks of confusion.
When they reached the ground floor, Nelium came out from behind the counter immediately.
“Gabrielle, is there a problem? Something unsatisfactory?”
“No, Nelium, thanks. We just need to get out for a while. We left our stuff up there, so we’ll be back shortly.”
Nelium nodded. “We’ll make sure it remains undisturbed.” Secretly he was glad they were getting out for a while. They had put in more hours in the last fortnight than some of his regular patrons did in a whole year and he had been growing concerned by their paling features and pinched faces. Judging just by the anticipation he could see lurking in their eyes, he was sure this was a good idea.
The Amazons stepped out into golden warmth for the first time in fifteen days and they all drew a sigh of relief as the late afternoon sunshine touched their skin. Being an outdoor people by nature made this assignment difficult from the outset and with what was riding on their shoulders, it became an almost impossible burden to bear.
Gabrielle watched as they each seemed to shed a little of the pall that had been hanging over them and nodded to herself. This had been the right thing to do. Despite the fact that their work was critical to the Nation as a whole, they could not run themselves into the ground doing it. It wouldn’t solve anything and was just as likely to make their task impossible.
She turned to them and said, “I want each of you to go into the market for a bit. Relax. Enjoy yourself. Try some new food. When the sun is completely set, meet me back here. We can work a little later tonight, but I think we all need a break away from this place.” She made a shooing motion. “G’wan. Have a little fun.” Then she stepped around them, headed for the heart of the market.
Gabrielle was gone before they realized it, completely disappeared into the crowd of people that was again roaming the streets in the late afternoon sun. The Amazons were at something of a loss. They’d never had a leader quite like Gabrielle and weren’t sure what to make of her now.
It took a full minute before they understood that their Queen, regardless of her immortal status was wandering around in a crowd of potential hostile people with no honor guard and another minute to grasp that that was precisely the way Gabrielle wanted it. With a collective sigh they split into small groups and made their way into the marketplace, more than a little curious to see what this old ‘new’ land had to offer them.
Gabrielle, meanwhile, was noticing the many changes that had come to this land since her last visit. Especially obvious was the appalling number of Romans out and about. Something was off-kilter here and it made Gabrielle’s warrior sense tingle unpleasantly.
Still there wasn’t much she could do about it right now besides watch and listen since they were merely walking around like she was, so with eyes peeled and ears open, she went in search of some food.
The afternoon passed pleasantly enough and Gabrielle could feel herself begin to relax as she strolled along the outer banks of the river that ran through the city. The solitude was pure bliss. We needed this… *I* needed this she thought to herself. We’ve been pushing so hard it’s a wonder no one has started a fight… or worse. She shook her head to clear it of memories. I’ll have to pace us a little better. Won’t do anyone any good if….
The thought broke off completely as the copper scent of blood and slaughter reached her nose and sent the nape hairs on her neck standing up in both excitement and fear. It had been a while since she’d fed or fought and the smell reminded her how desperately she needed the blood.
Gabrielle adjusted her grip on her staff, unconsciously setting her steps to those of a hunter that had no desire to be heard in her quest. The hunt caused her senses to change – her hearing and sense of smell became acute and it only took and instant for her body to register the trouble.
There were sounds of fighting… the grunts and groans of human beings hitting and being hit. The clash of metal on metal as weapons clanged together. The sucking wet sound of flesh being impaled. And far off was the acrid smell of smoke as a fire began to rage somewhere.
Without conscious thought, Gabrielle’s hold on her staff tightened and adrenaline lent wings to her feet. What she found when she reached the edge of the city astonished her.
Fire was everywhere, illuminating the city to the point of seeming daylight. Romans were thick as a swarm of locusts and just as destructive. Where ever Gabrielle turned her eyes, there were Romans – stealing, killing, destroying.
She felt the rage and this time made no effort to stop it. Instead, she welcomed the burning, feeling her teeth lengthen to meet her need and desire as the scent of blood wafted to her hyper-sensitive nose.
Without a sound she waded into battle, decimating anything and everything in her path. Her staff was swift and sure and killed everyone it touched with a single blow. Methodically she made her way forward towards the library, knowing her Amazons would be there and fearing what she would find.
She came around the corner and stopped dead at the sight before her. The library was engulfed in flames. Gabrielle choked back a cry and let the rage build. The fury of what they had lost held her rooted to the spot. It was only when she noticed her Amazons under attack that she moved forward.
With hard, precise movements she decimated every Roman that came within reach of her staff. Then the unthinkable happened.
Gabrielle knew she had let the rage go too far when a Roman soldier gutted Demetria before her eyes. Immediately she fell on him, sinking her fangs into his neck without thought or hesitation. He reached for her and she clawed him, shredding away his chest. She left a hole in his neck when she ripped her mouth from it, tearing the flesh away down to the bone. He was falling dead to the ground before she realized the consequences of her actions.
She moved to the fallen Captain, her eyes returning to their normal verdant green color even as she sank to the steps to check her wound. The Amazons which had shrank away from her animal fury now tried to stand between their Queen and their fallen comrade. Their shock prevented them from interfering with her ministrations to Demetria, but she could feel the myriad of emotions coursing through them as they inwardly debated their options.
“Don’t,” was all she said when one raised a sword at her back. The woman hesitated. “There are things here at work you have no possible understanding of.”
The woman snorted. “I know you’re a bacchae… that means you could have saved any number of us over the years. Just like you could save Demetria now, but I bet you won’t. The plague that has fallen on our Nation is probably due to you.”
The rest of the women stood open-mouthed, shocked at the woman’s audacity, but Gabrielle could see the beginnings of doubt spring up in their eyes even as she continued to work to save Demetria’s life.
“In fact,” the woman continued, emboldened by her success thus far, “how do we know you’re trying to heal her? How do we know she or any of us won’t be your next meal?”
Gabrielle turned, unwilling to move her hands from the Captain’s body as they persistently fought to keep Demetria alive. But they could all see the banked fire in her eyes spark to life and involuntarily stepped back a pace.
“Never, not once in almost three hundred cycles have I ever been anything but a friend to the Amazon Nation! I have fought with you, cried with you, helped birth your babies and buried your dead! This is the reason I never shared this secret… knowing that you would turn away from me in fear and disgust despite the fact that I never did anything to deserve it!”
She turned away and bit her lip, the pain and anger overwhelming for a moment and she struggled to bring it under control. She ripped a clean bit of her robe off and pressed it against the hole to staunch the blood flow. Then she looked back up at the women who until a few minutes ago she had considered sisters and friends.
“You’re right. I could have used this to save those who died over the years, but let me assure you that the cruelty involved in doing so would be more than I can bear. You have NO idea what it’s like knowing that I will NEVER find an eternal rest. Why in the name of the gods would I inflict that on people I consider my friends and my family?? Especially knowing the curse that is attached to the immortality!”
Gabrielle turned back to Demetria and noticed that her breathing was less erratic and that the bleeding from her wound had slowed considerably.
“Let me ask you something, Tyra. What makes you think that immortality is such a gift, huh? What makes you think that being a slave to a drive you have no control over is such a wonderful thing? There are days I would give anything to have remained just the simple bard who traveled around with the Warrior Princess and after a time found peace in the Elysian Fields.”
She looked at her hands, covered in Demetria’s blood, then held them up for the group to see. “Eternity with years upon countless years of bloodshed to look forward to.” She stuck her tongue in her cheek and shook her head. “Suddenly it’s a lot less appealing, isn’t it?”
Gabrielle’s shoulders slumped in discouragement and she stared to rise. Though she’d already decided to remain behind for a while, having the option of returning to the Amazons had been one she’d wanted to keep open. Now in all likelihood not only was it closed, but it was just as likely that they would come hunting for her. And she would kill them to stay alive. Despite everything, she was going to survive to find Xena.
Gabrielle turned away from them, stopping only when she felt the slightest pressure on her foot. She looked down to see Demetria’s dark eyes looking back at her.
“My Queen?” she whispered.
Gabrielle turned back to the Captain, conscious on a way she had never been before of the blood that covered her.
“What is it Demetria?” asked softly though the sounds of the city burning around them drowned out all other noise, including the screams of the dead and dying.
“For what?” asked through tears now. She knew that even with all her skill and years of practice, the odds were still extremely slim that Demetria would survive the wound she’d received.
“For letting me choose to die… if it comes to that. I think it takes more courage to live forever than to die a warrior.” The Captain coughed, then winced in reflex at the pain it caused. “I cannot imagine living with what you’ve seen… with what you know. Especially alone.” She drew a deep breath. “So thank you.”
Gabrielle nodded and let the tears roll silently down her cheek as she patted Demetria’s shoulder gently. “You’re welcome, my friend. Just live to appreciate it a while longer, hmm?”
Then Gabrielle rose and turned to face the rest of the Amazons.
“I think in light of what has happened here tonight and given your now obvious distrust of me, it would be best if I remain here for a while. I have no desire to inflict myself on you or the Nation and I certainly don’t want to cause harm. You can wait til the second ship arrives, which should be in a few days and go home then.”
Suddenly she rose up and as though donning a cloak, assumed the look and posture of Royalty.
“I would appreciate it if you could keep what happened tonight between us, though if you feel you can’t, heed my words well. I will not hesitate to kill anyone who comes after me in order to stay alive. I have some things to take care of in the future and I fully intend to be there to insure they get done.”
“Did you just threaten us?” asked the woman called Tyra.
“No,” Gabrielle said regally. “I just gave you a guarantee.”
The silence that surrounded them amidst the chaos in the city was profound and Gabrielle let it sink in before she spoke again.
“Now, let’s get Demetria back to the inn and see if anything is left of it. She needs more than I can do for her here if she’s to have any hope of surviving.”
“We can manage….” Tyra started, but was cut off by the Captain’s words.
“Thank you, my Queen. I would be honored if you would join us.”
The honest warmth of the words easily offset the chill that had run through her veins since her physical attack on the Roman. With only a few mutterings, the Amazons set out to build a travois and were just ready to move the wounded woman when a new set of problems came their way.
Gabrielle stood, once again letting the burning take her to a place she seldom sought and even more rarely used. The Amazons stood amazed for a very long moment, watching the conscious transformation of their usually gentle Queen into the sheer ferocity of a bacchae.
The Romans were now going through the city in small squads, eliminating the remaining pockets of resistance and generally terrorizing those few people still able to fight back. When they came upon the Amazons and saw what had happened to the man they had called centurion, they fell to with a will, expecting an easy conquest.
“Leave us now, children,” she spoke in a low, husky voice. “Mama has some business to attend to and it’s past your bedtime.”
Each of them recognized the wording as a way for Gabrielle to retain some semblance of control until they left. They also understood it was a direct order and made all haste to escape back towards the inn that they had called home during their short stay in Alexandria. They heard her roar and picked up their pace, knowing that Gabrielle had deliberately become something she despised in order to protect their departure.
Surprisingly, their inn, tucked in an inconspicuous little corner two streets off the main road was currently untouched and the Amazons quickly went to their rooms. They placed the ailing Captain on one of the pallets and two of them stayed with her while another pair moved out into the common room.
They waited and called for service and when no one replied, they finally went behind the bar and took what they needed. When the re-entered the room, they noted Demetria’s pallor and shallow breathing and went to work, hoping beyond hope they weren’t too late.
Meanwhile, Gabrielle had tapped into a part of herself so dark, Ares, or Mars as he was in this time and place, felt the trembling in the essence of force around him. He promised to investigate the cause of the tingling in his spine and the stirring of blood in his veins as soon as the city was secure. There was something almost hauntingly familiar about it, but he was breaking in a new warlord and wanted to watch his prodigy’s progress.
The war god sighed. It wasn’t like it had been in the old days. Again his thoughts turned to Xena. She had been his most favored chosen and he still missed her… missed her fire and her passion. He even missed her irritating little blonde friend, who in the end had been as much of a warrior in her own right as Xena had.
He mulled the thought over even while his eyes stared unseeingly at the battle around him. It would have been something quite spectacular had he been able to bring Gabrielle into his fold. She would have brought Xena with her and they would have been unstoppable. He sighed again and disappeared, suddenly more interested in searching for the reason behind his disturbing thoughts than remaining with a battle that had become boring and predictable.
Since he wasn’t sure what he was searching for, it took Ares a bit of time to find the cause of his excitement. And when he found it, it caused him no small amount of alarm.
“Bacchae?” he said to himself. “I thought we were rid of those when Xena destroyed Bacchus. I wonder if the Romans….” He let the though trail off, taking note of the total destruction that had been wreaked on the bodies strewn around the library. He doubted anyone short of a god would be able to identify what was left as human, much less put names to faces. He briefly wondered if they bodies had been desecrated as a warning. Then he shook his head and returned to what was left of the battle of Alexandria.
Gabrielle didn’t take any time or finesse with the soldiers who approached and now surrounded her. This was about life and death pure and simple… her life and their death. Unfortunately, none of them were bright enough to realize that the small woman who stood before them was more than she seemed and they spent a bit of time making lewd comments to and about her.
Finally, Gabrielle had enough and without warning she moved. The bodies of the soldiers were shredded, ruined beyond recognition as she tore through them, unleashing the fury of centuries against Rome without the thought of mercy.
It didn’t take long and when she was done, Gabrielle walked away with the thought of needing a bath to rid herself of the stench of Rome that now clung to her skin in a tangible reminder of what she’d done. Her mind refused to dwell on it and the part of her that needed blood to be sated gloried in it. It had been years since it had felt such satisfaction and never had it been so gratifying.
Gabrielle knew in her soul that she would be sickened when her mind had a chance to process what had happened – what she had become and what she had done with the becoming – but for now, she was content with how things stood.
She made her way to the inn and noted that it seemed to be deserted. She hesitated and looked down at herself, knowing that the spectre of her appearance was the thing nightmares were made of. Instead of going in immediately, she took a short detour to the bathing room, dropping her clothing outside the door and locking the door behind her as she crossed the threshold.
Alexandria had some of the most convenient plumbing arrangements she’d found and she took advantage of the fact that this particular inn offered warm showers. For long minutes Gabrielle stood under the running water, letting it rinse away the blood and gore that lingered on her person. Then she took the provided soap and scrubbed, scratching at her skin in a frenzy of cleaning until it was raw and nearly bleeding itself.
Only time spent breathing and meditating brought that impulse under control and she quickly finished up and stepped from the shower, wrapping a towel around her bare body before emerging from the room. She picked up the bag she’d keep with her by habit and wiped the leather surface clean of blood. Then she moved to face the Amazons once more.
Gabrielle stepped into her room, thankful she was alone. The rest of the Amazons insisted that her position as their Queen demanded she was entitled to the privacy of a single room and Gabrielle was happy to let them. She’d grown accustomed to her solitary existence and knew that adjusting to a roommate after all this time that wasn’t Xena would be more than a little awkward and uncomfortable for her.
She removed a new set of clothing, thankful she’d had most of hers tailored in the Samurai tradition of trousers beneath the skirt. Gabrielle had foregone them since their arrival in Alexandria, choosing instead to wear the toga fashion that was most common here.
Now however, knowing it would be a fight to get to this ship, assuming it was still in the harbor, she donned the warrior’s costume fashioned for her by a master, centuries before.
When she was finished, Gabrielle stood before the small looking glass seeing the reflection of someone she hadn’t been in a long time. Her hair was a little longer perhaps and more golden, but the person staring back at her was much the same as the one who’d stood on Mt. Fuji and watched the sun go down.
The day everything changed, she thought absently, knowing that one decision was responsible for the oldness now reflected in her eyes. Though her immortality was what gave her the opportunity to see and do what she had since, the fact that she was alone is what made her feel the age of every single year she had already lived through and all the years she had yet to experience.
Gabrielle sighed, knowing how fruitless such contemplation was, but unable to stop it. The melancholy was only going to get worse until she got past the darkness that had overtaken her and right now there was no time to work through it. Right now her responsibility was to the Amazons and getting them to the harbor and away as quickly and safely as she possibly could.
Gabrielle straightened her shoulders and opened the door, nearly running into a courier who stood just outside with hand poised to knock.
The woman flushed and bowed. “My Queen.”
Gabrielle quickly adjusted her mental plans, knowing it Nadine was here that the second ship had arrived. She was glad she’d had the foresight to explain to the second crew exactly where they planned to be and how best to find them if they were not there.
“When did you arrive? And where is the ship?” Gabrielle asked as they crossed the hall and she knocked on the door before opening it.
Two Amazons stopped her with raised swords before they realized who it was and nodded to allow her to approach. Gabrielle returned their nod, approving of their discipline and care of their fellow Amazons.
“How is she?” Gabrielle asked softly as she reached the bed that Demetria lay on.
“A little better, I think,” Tyra replied, then continued a little more uneasily. “Your quick action outside the library probably saved her life.”
Gabrielle accepted the words silently, knowing it was more of a concession than she had expected to get from this particular Amazon. Instead she turned to the woman who had accompanied her into the room.
“We need to get out of here and to the ship as quickly possible.”
Nadine nodded. “Captain Eulee found a cove up the coast a ways. It’s a bit of a walk, but it was the safest place we could hide in and still have any hope of finding you and getting everyone out of here safely. We can leave as soon as you’re ready.”
Tyra spoke up. “What about our other ship?”
Nadine shook her head. “It’s impossible to tell and even harder to get to the harbor right now. It is awash in Romans and fire.” She didn’t tell them of the debate that had raged on her own ship when they’d seen the chaos running rampant through the city long before they approached it. It was only when the Captain found a place they could land without being seen that they had agreed to hunting for Gabrielle and their sisters on shore.
“It is gonna be a little crowded,” indicating that their stop at the Sinhales Island had been very successful, “but I think under the circumstances everyone will kinda get over it. We need to go soon though. I know everyone was a bit wary of being caught here.”
Gabrielle nodded and assumed the reins of command once more.
“If everyone is packed and ready,” noting the bags that sat on the small table, “we can get moving. You two,” motioning to the two nearest the door, “gather everything together. Tyra, you and Nadine take the travois. That leaves Lisset and me to cover the front and rear. Now Nadine, where exactly is the ship?”
While the small scout gave Gabrielle the directions she needed to find the boat, the rest of the small contingent made ready to leave. And within moments, the group was headed out and away from what was left of the once great city of Alexandria.
They were making good progress, Gabrielle carefully making sure to avoid anyone or anything that would detain them. Demetria had been given a healing draught that put her out and was thus able to make the trip in unknowing comfort. Nadine gave Gabrielle directions occasionally, making sure they stayed on track. And slowly the small troupe made its way to the shore.
The breeze that carried the tang of salt to them was refreshing and helped them to pick up the pace, knowing their escape was near. Just as they saw the ship in the near distance, a shower of rose petals heralded the arrival of an unexpected visitor.
“Hiya, Sweet cheeks!” putting her arms around Gabrielle in a big hug. “How are ya? Man, but I have so totally missed you! Where’ve you like, been?” taking a look around and seeing the wounded Captain on the pallet. “Ew, like, what happened to the babe?”
The Amazons stopped at the sudden intrusion, never having actually seen a god in the flesh before. Gabrielle wasn’t sure whether to be gratified or annoyed. She eased out of Dite’s arms.
“Hi, Dite,” Gabrielle answered a little stiffly. “Can we talk in a bit? I’ve got to get these guys to that boat over there so they can get outta here.”
“Oh, no problem,” the goddess answered, snapping her fingers. In a blink, the small group went from the far side of the beach to the deck of the ship. “There ya go, cutie. All present and accounted for.”
“Um, thanks, Aphrodite,” Gabrielle said as the Amazons on deck slowly lowered their weapons as they recognized their comrades. “Uh, let me get these guys settled and then, um, maybe we can talk?”
The goddess nodded and moved to stand next to Demetria’s pallet. The Amazons stood back respectfully, but watched closely as Aphrodite smoothed the hair from the unconscious woman’s face. Her hands trailed down the Captain’s body until the reached the wound and they lingered there for a long moment. Without a word, Dite moved away from the woman and went to stand alone on the bow.
A murmur rose from the Amazons, most of them amazed to have seen a god in person. Gabrielle called out instructions and after a moment’s hesitation, the Amazons moved to get the ship ready for departure.
It only took a few minutes for Eulee to get everyone settled. It would be a very tight fit on the voyage home, but at least they were all returning and had a new group of sisters joining them. Just as they were ready to cast off, Gabrielle stood before them.
“I wish you all well on your journey. I hope it is speedy and safe.”
“You’ll not be coming home with us then?”
“No, Dite and I have some things to catch up on. We haven’t seen each other in a while. I hope to return at a later time.” Gabrielle looked right at Tyra when she spoke and the Amazon bowed her head in acknowledgement. She and the others would keep Gabrielle’s secret.
“Queen Gabrielle, is that really the goddess of love?”
Aphrodite turned to face the mass of amazons then and came to stand at Gabrielle’s side. “I sure am, babe!”
There were more mumblings among the women and Dite actually blushed at some of the comments she could make out. Gabrielle chuckled silently, though she blushed as well.
Dite cleared her throat. “Well, it been radically, um… well not fun, but definitely different. You gals rock! I’ll make sure ya’ll get outta here safe.” And with a shower of sparks and rose petals, she and Gabrielle disappeared.
Mount Olympus hadn’t changed much in the three hundred cycles since her last visit, Gabrielle pondered idly as she stood at the window. She wasn’t sure exactly where she was looking at… it was a beautiful outdoor scene of somewhere she had never been. Beautiful white sand beaches melted into green grass that led to a lake with a waterfall rushing off the side of a mountain.
“Radical, isn’t it?” Dite asked as she came into the room. “I put all my faves together in one pic so I could always look out and see what I wanted.”
Gabrielle nodded without turning around. “It’s nice,” she commented absently, letting the breeze stir her hair. Aphrodite walked up behind her and placed a hand on the longer locks.
“Is something wrong, Gabs? You’ve changed so much, though your hair reminds me a lot of that young kid from Poteidaia.” Aphrodite waited a moment, then drew a deep breath and plunged ahead. “I’ve really missed you. You’ve got no idea how surprised I was when you crossed my scrying bowl earlier. Where’ve you been, babe?”
Aphrodite noted the shaking shoulders and without another word she turned Gabrielle into her and enfolded the bard in an embrace. For the first time in an eternity, Gabrielle returned the hug of another being fully and wept silently as though her heart was breaking. Dite couldn’t stop the tears that welled up in her eyes and wiped them away as Gabrielle withdrew from her arms.
“You wanna talk?” was all she said.
Gabrielle nodded. “I’d like that. It’d be nice to be able to talk to someone who understands immortality and what an eternity really is.”
Dite nodded but didn’t comment. She been alive for an eternity when Gabrielle was born and yet how different it must be for her, the goddess thought. I was born an immortal with the powers of a god and an immortal purpose in life. Gabrielle was born with the expectancy of living and dying a natural human life.
Instead she popped them into her favorite relaxation spot… the hot tub, complete with jet sprays and pink bubbles. With a sigh she settled back and waited for Gabrielle to speak, not understanding until this moment how much she’d missed her interaction with the bard. A sudden thought cause Dite to sit upright and slosh bubbles all over the place. Gabrielle looked at her a little startled.
“Sorry, babe. Just thought of something.” She popped out and a moment later popped back in. Gabrielle blinked in confusion at her sudden burst of energy.
“Cool. Now we’re all set for some majorly serious catching up. I just had to make sure Ares couldn’t like, you know, waltz in here.”
“Yeah, you know… c’mon in uninvited. He almost caught you today, ya know. It’s how I found you.”
“How you found me?” Gabrielle was beginning to feel less than articulate. She wasn’t sure if it was her or Aphrodite or her exhaustion or that fact that her mind was beginning to replay the night’s episode in her head, but whatever the cause, her coherence was less than what it should have been and she found herself simply repeating the pertinent parts of Dite’s words to her.
“Yeah, you know, you like totally disappeared. You didn’t take the Amazons to that gnarly little island. I checked and I kept checking. I even looked at all those other little islands and I never like, found you. Where’d you go babe?”
Gabrielle swallowed hard. “You didn’t forget about me?” in a small voice.
“No way, cutie. Why would I do something grody like that?” The goddess reached a hand over and brushed the bangs back from Gabrielle’s face, placing a light kiss on her forehead. “You’re my friend.”
The events of the night and three hundred years of loneliness caught up to Gabrielle suddenly and violently. “I think I’m gonna be sick,” she said before rushing from the tub. Aphrodite followed her, covering her and wiping her face down and giving her some water when she was done. Then she clothed them both and popped them into the room in her suite that she’d set aside for Gabrielle’s use. Gently she tucked the bard in and moved to her own room, lost in thought over Gabrielle’s reaction. Twice she arose to sooth the nightmares that plagued Gabrielle’s sleep. It was a long time before she closed her own eyes in rest.
Gabrielle had no way of discerning how much time had passed when she finally opened her eyes. She had eventually fallen into a deep, dreamless sleep, though her nightmares returned to her vividly in the light of day. She closed her eyes and held on until the wave of nausea passed. She knew it would fade with time. She just wished it wasn’t there to begin with.
With a sigh, the bard rose from the bed and made her way to the shower Dite had set up for her use… after her comment on how she missed the waterfall showers she and Xena had always shared. It wasn’t the same, of course… Xena was absent and the water was pleasantly warm, but she enjoyed it anyway and she walked away from it feeling better than she had in a while.
Gabrielle did a little investigating around her room and found that Aphrodite had set up things for her comfort. The goddess’s thoughtfulness almost brought her to tears again, but she shook her head and got dressed, determined to find her friend. They’d been apart too long and had a lot of catching up to do.
Aphrodite looked up from her scrying bowl as Gabrielle knocked tentatively on the doorway, removing her glasses and studying the bard with frank appraisal. What she saw made her smile sadly. Immortality was taking a toll on Gabrielle, as told by the oldness of her eyes. But she looked better for her night’s sleep and she was as fit and lean as Aphrodite recalled her being in her youth. Dite smiled. She remembered well several of the gods watching the duo just to see Gabrielle lose a little more clothing each time she got a new outfit.
Gabrielle noted the odd smile and wondered at the cause. But she promptly forgot as Dite bade her enter the workroom. Without further hesitation and feeling sure of her welcome, Gabrielle walked right into Aphrodite’s arms and gave her a big hug.
“Good morning, Sweetpea,” the goddess commented around the lump in her throat. The affection was totally unexpected and she knew that from Gabrielle, true friendship lay behind the gesture. She kissed the bard’s head and smoothed her hair down as she stepped back slightly to catch the green eyes with her own.
“You look better this morning. How ya feelin’?”
“Better. It’s good to be here. I’ve missed you.”
“Oh babe!” taking her in another hard, fast embrace. “I’ve missed you too.” Dite stood back and took Gabrielle’s hand in her own, leading her away from the scrying bowl and toward a table laden with all of Gabrielle’s favorites… or at least the favorites Aphrodite was familiar with.
They ate in silence for a bit before Gabrielle leaned back and looked Aphrodite straight in the eye. “I owe you an apology.”
Confusion crossed Dite’s features. “You do? What for?”
Gabrielle looked down at her plate, putting her bread down and clasping her hands together in her lap. “Doubting you. I knew you would have to hunt for us when we blew so far off course, but when year after year passed and you never came, I just figured you’d….” Slim shoulders shrugged. “I dunno… gotten too busy or forgotten about me.”
Aphrodite bit her lips in a sad smile at the forlorn picture Gabrielle presented in this moment. She’d always known the bard as a strong-minded, independent, iron-willed person and the fact that she was still in her right mind after three hundred years of virtual aloneness attested to that fact. But even she… Hades, *especially* she understood just how lonely immortality could be. And she admired Gabrielle’s spunk in admitting to needing a friend who understood it. It had taken the Olympians the coming of Twilight to admit any sort of need and even then they skewered it until it had almost become their oblivion.
Dite rose from her seat and went round the table to kneel at Gabrielle’s side. She reached up one hand a lifted Gabrielle’s chin to meet her eyes and covered the bard’s clasped hands with the other.
“Oh babe, I NEVER forgot about you, just like you never forgot about me. I just couldn’t find you. You disappeared completely off of my screen. As soon as I found you, I popped in. And I gotta tell ya, girlfriend, you were a sight for sore eyes.”
Gabrielle gave Aphrodite a genuine, if watery smile. “Really?”
“Absolutely. I was way glad to see you again.” She paused and pushed the bangs out of Gabrielle’s eyes and popped a chair beneath her. “Getting a little old to be kneeling like that,” cheered when she heard Gabrielle’s soft chuckle. “So tell me where you’ve been… what happened.”
And for the first time in a very long time, Gabrielle fell into bard mode, and with flair and enthusiasm told the story of the Amazon’s journey to their new homeland. By turns, Aphrodite was thrilled, appalled, overwhelmed and joyful. Eventually the tale turned melancholy as Gabrielle spoke of friends who had passed into their afterlife.
Aphrodite could feel the loneliness of Gabrielle’s soul and again cursed her brother for the predicament they all, but particularly Gabrielle, found themselves in now. She saw how Gabrielle had withdrawn from the world around her as a way of coping with her isolation from the mortal realm as she knew it. Curiosity tickled in the back of her mind and when the bard paused, Aphrodite spoke up.
“So what brought you back out, Gab? I mean, it sounds like you’ve totally settled in your new pad.”
Gabrielle chuckled. “I think I would have come out eventually. I was beginning to feel um, hemmed in. But a crisis in the Nation brought us out and then Rome once again,” her voice hardening, “destroyed years of knowledge and weeks of hard work.”
Dite’s brows crinkled in concern. “What kind of crisis? Maybe I can help.”
Aphrodite was profoundly hurt by Gabrielle’s lack of faith in her and her abilities. “C’mon Gab… at least let me try.”
“Oh, no, Aphrodite,” Gabrielle waved a hand to stop the goddess’s speech, then she grasped both of Dite’s hands gently in her own. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to slight you or your abilities. You know I think you totally rock!”
Aphrodite couldn’t help but laugh and forget her mad when Gabrielle smiled up at her in all sincerity with those big green eyes and the cutest blush. She leaned over and kissed Gabrielle’s forehead and all was forgiven between them.
“I don’t know what kind of crisis. I mean, we were here to look for a cure to something that was killing the Nation slowly. I had a list of symptoms to go by, but we still hadn’t found out what it was, much less how to cure it,” said with more than a hint of bitterness. “I guess I failed the Nation, again.”
Dite rose and picked up her glasses, a little annoyed that she actually needed them more than she wanted to admit. She held out a hand to Gabrielle, who clutched it and stood up with a questioning look on her face.
“C’mon. I’ll bet we can figure this out. After all… I have the Olympic library at my disposal here and it that doesn’t work, well, we can always go to Rome.”
Gabrielle’s face screwed up in distaste.
“Then again, maybe not,” Dite replied lightly and tugged the smaller woman with her to her desk.
Gabrielle would have taken a seat on one side of desk, but Aphrodite continued pulling her around to the working side. With a wave of her hand a map of the known world appeared on the desk top. Gabrielle gazed at it, intrigued by the way it seemed to be lit from within and wondering just how it was managed. But her attention was drawn back to the map itself when Aphrodite started talking again.
“Okay, cutie. This is the world as we know it – Greece, Britannia and the Norselands, Rome, Gaul, Egypt, India and Chin,” pointing out each of the places on the map and deliberately omitting Japa. No need to bring up those memories now. Nothing but water and clouds cover the remaining squares of the map. “This is the Sinhales Islands,” gesturing to the original destination. “So where were you?”
Gabrielle looked at the map, then looked up at the ceiling and closed her eyes. “We made charts once we figured out we weren’t going where we thought we were. And we updated them on our way back to Egypt.” The bard furrowed her brow in thought. “It was so strange… the stars that I knew so well from my time with Xena all changed. Some of them stood on their heads; others were missing completely; and there were new ones I had never seen before.”
Gabrielle opened her eyes and looked at the map again. “From everything we could figure out, we landed somewhere right about….” She pointed to an area almost off the map covered by clouds. “Here.”
Aphrodite’s brows shot into her hairline. “Are you sure?”
“Can you…?” Gabrielle motioned towards the ceiling. “Can you put the stars above us?”
Dite looked at her strangely, then waved the constellations into being overhead. Gabrielle searched the heavens, spinning until she was sure.
“Okay,” she said, removing a bit of parchment from her bag. “This is how they look in the Amazon homeland.”
Aphrodite took the scroll and studied it, changing the sky above her until it resembled the sketch she held in her hands.
Gabrielle studied it carefully before she nodded. “Yep.”
Dite took off her glasses and chewed on the earpiece thoughtfully. “All righty then. We need to turn the worldwide god web southeast a bit to see if we can get a reading on this gnarly new place. C’mon.”
They walked over to the area that held the wwgw and Dite flipped on the screen. “‘Kay… if we….” She turned a knob and pushed a couple buttons. “And then we….” Another button. “And then….” She aimed her little block box at the screen. “We should….” She waited a moment, then smacked the side of the monitor. “Oh yeah,” Dite said as the picture came through clearly. “That rocks. ‘Kay, let’s see if we can find us some Amazons.”
Gabrielle watched in fascination as the familiar shores of the Nation came into view.
“Cool,” Dite said. “Looks like you were totally on target there, cutie. Awesome. Now, let’s see if we can find out what is ailing these bodacious babes and figure out how to like, fix it.”
They skimmed through the Nation until they came to the healer’s hut. It was empty. They moved on to the Regent’s hut, the mess hall which only had the cooks in it at this time of day and then they came to the council chambers.
Here sat the leaders of the village, including the healer who was at the moment answering a question from another of the council members.
“Well, I’m sure whatever Queen Gabrielle and the rest come back with will be helpful should we encounter it again, but hopefully it was destroyed by the fire that went through the eastern plain right after they left.”
“So you think it was confined to that one area?”
“It appears so, Regent Cylla. It was the one common thing that all the victims shared. We still don’t know *what* caused it. Buitu tends to think and so do I for that matter, that the fire will have eliminated it. But we can’t be sure for a while yet.”
Cylla ran her hands through her dark hair. “Well, with any luck then, the fire has taken care of it. At least for now it’s gone then and the eastern plain is off limits until further notice. Perhaps the Queen will be able to pinpoint the problem so we know what to look for if this starts happening again.”
Dite felt rather than saw Gabrielle’s shoulder’s drop. “Well,” she commented brightly, “the good news is your plague seems to have fixed itself.”
Gabrielle nodded forlornly. “The bad news is I gave them nothing and after what happened….” She broke off and Dite didn’t wait long to jump in.
“What did happen? I know you like, did something radical to get Ares attention, but I missed a lot of stuff looking for you once I saw you, ya know, cross my screen.”
Gabrielle sighed and her shoulders slumped even further than before. “The Amazons found out the truth behind my immortality.”
“Oh,” was all Dite said, but a world of expression was housed in that single utterance.
“Yeah, oh,” Gabrielle repeated. “I had already decided to stay behind, see if you still remembered me or whatever,” said with a slight shrug, “but….”
“But that was like having the decision made for you.”
“Yeah and I know what we needed was there somewhere. We would have found it.” She smiled a little. “It was frustrating, though… that’s why we weren’t in the library when it went up in flames. We just needed a little break.”
Aphrodite sat lost in thought for a moment and Gabrielle’s attention went back to what had happened and what she could have done differently. Without warning, Dite rose from her place and took Gabrielle’s hand again.
“C’mon. I got an idea.”
They went into the vast library that Olympus held… both of them sneezing violently at the amount of dust contained in the large room.
“Guess this place doesn’t get used much,” Gabrielle commented wryly as she wiped her hands together to rid them of dirt.
“Um, no,” Dite replied with a sheepish shrug. “I actually can’t remember the last time I was in here. Hmm,” she said, looking around at the towers of shelves. Then she apparently came to a decision.
“Here,” Dite said, leading Gabrielle to a console. “Ew! Grody! Hang on a sec,” and with a wave of her hand, made centuries of dust and neglect simply disappear. She took another look, pleased by the difference. “Muuuuuch better. ‘Kay, now… I want you to sit here and…. Oh, you like, don’t know how to type yet, I guess.”
She pushed the keyboard out of the way and replaced it with a scroll, quill and ink. Gabrielle studied the odd instrument a moment longer before turning to Dite with a serious question.
“Why are the letters all mixed up?’
“Pul-eeze… like anyone would explain that to me. Rumor had it that it was a test Hera devised for Zeus, but really, who knows.” She shrugged then waved her hands. “Anyhoo, that so doesn’t like, matter right now. Right now, I need you to sit your cute self down and write out every radical detail you can remember about this… thing… illness, plague, whatever… that was messing with your Amazons. Then we’ll put it into the web and should have a fix, like pronto.”
Gabrielle shook her head, gleaning the important parts of Dite’s speech and letting the rest fall to the wayside. She sat down immediately and wet the tip if the quill, dipping it into the ink and beginning to write. She had the symptoms memorized. It wouldn’t take long.
Dite went back to her work room, not a little surprised to see Ares waiting outside the door.
“Hey bro! How’s it hangin’?”
Ares pushed off the wall and shrugged. “A little to the left,” smirking when Dite made a face at his answer. “Hey, you asked.”
“TMI, bro… waaaaay TMI.”
Ares gave a full out belly laugh. “You know better than to ask.”
Dite chuckled. Despite the fact that he was a sincere pain in her ass, she really loved Ares and missed him a lot now that he was in Rome so much. “Yeah, I do.” She paused. “So whassup?” hoping Gabrielle would take her time before coming back.
“Not much,” he answered, following her into her workroom. “I thought I’d stop in to say hello before I got back to work. The Romans are keeping me busy these days… or I’m keeping them….” He shrugged again and waved a dismissive hand. “Whatever. I, um….” He kicked the ground with the toe of his boot and looked for all the world like a kid caught with his hand stuck in the cookie jar. “I kinda miss you.” Not mentioning the odd feeling in Alexandria that reminded him of home and her.
Aphrodite broke into smiles and sparkles. “Oh Ares, you’re such a sweetie.” Her eyes became slightly teary. “I miss you too… I miss all you guys. I get a little lonely here by myself sometimes.”
“Well, you know, Dite… you could come to Rome.” But even as he spoke, he knew she wouldn’t.
“No, this is home for me,” she said softly. “I get over there a lot, but it’s just not the same.”
Ares nodded, knowing it for the truth. The Romans took up a lot more time than he’d imagined they would, but he still missed the old days… Greece and Olympus.
He took her in an awkward embrace then stepped away, almost embarrassed at his perceived weakness. “I gotta get back,” he said. “Maybe I can get some of the others together and we can come home for a short visit.”
“Oh, I’m liking that radical idea, bro! You rock!”
Ares couldn’t help the color that suffused his features or the tiny smile that crossed his lips. Despite their differences, Dite was and always would be his favorite. She just had a knack for making him crazy… in the many various incarnations that it was possible to do so.
“So do you. Later!” And he was gone in a field of blue fire before she could respond.
Aphrodite stood rooted to the spot, gazing with tears in her eyes at where he’d been for a timeless moment. Only when Gabrielle cleared her throat behind her did the goddess of love take a deep breath and wiped her eyes none-too-subtlety.
“I, uh… I’m sorry, Dite. If this is a bad time….”
“No, babe. You’re timing is fab. I was just, um….” Aphrodite bit her lip, unsure exactly what to say.
Gabrielle shrugged. “Well, I was done kinda quick, but…” when I heard Ares voice, she thought, though she didn’t say it out loud, “I decided to look around the library.” Her eyes shone in remembered excitement. “I could get lost for days in there.”
Dite gave her a genuine smile. “Well, you’ve got the time. But let’s see whatcha got here and take care of business first.”
The goddess walked back to her desk, removing the virtual map and replacing it with her god web input screen. It had been quite a surprise to find out that there was land beyond the known world and Dite wondered briefly what other realities they were missing out on. Then she turned her attention back to the matter at hand.
Aphrodite got so completely caught up in what she was doing that she never even heard Gabrielle approach her until the bard laid a hand on her shoulder. Dite looked up, startled.
“Thank you, Aphrodite.”
Gabrielle didn’t say any more than that, but she really didn’t have to. Dite understood what she said and even more what she did say and nodded her acceptance of the sentiment with a smile. Then she drew a deep breath.
“Well, I’ll be honest, babe. I haven’t found out a whole lot about this. This is something radically new apparently….” Dite smiled sadly at Gabrielle’s defeated posture. “I’m gonna do a little more research on this thing though. See if we can at least find out the why behind it… ya know… to keep it from happening again.”
“You really think we can, Aphrodite?”
“Well, I think if it’s in the scroll bank we will.” She paused, pinching her lip before continuing. “The bad news is we were REALLY bad about keeping it up, so….” She shrugged. “We’ll keep trying though,” patting Gabrielle’s arm.
“Now,” Dite said, turning towards her screen again before the loud rumble of Gabrielle’s empty stomach interrupted her train of though. “Hmm… guess we better feed that beast ya got roaming around in there. You got a taste for anything in particular?”
“Xena,” Gabrielle stated without thought, then blushed to the roots of her hair. She scrubbed a hand over her face. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to say that.”
Aphrodite laughed out loud. “No, but you totally meant it now, didn’t you?” taking Gabrielle’s hand and leading her towards what in any other place would be called the kitchen. She looked back at the blushing bard. “Hey, it’s nothing to be ashamed of. I think… no, I *KNOW* what you two have absolutely rocks.” She hesitated, then continued. “I uh… can I tell you something honestly, friend to friend?”
The seriousness in her tone brought Gabrielle’s head up in concern and she lost her embarrassment in light of Aphrodite’s flushed face.
“You can tell me anything. We girls gotta stick together you know.”
Aphrodite cupped Gabrielle’s cheek and kissed her forehead. Then she turned and started walking back towards the food. Gabrielle waited, a little puzzled, then followed patiently behind, knowing Dite would speak when she was ready. Dite began rummaging up a snack for Gabrielle.
“What I had with Hephie, have with Vulcan as he is now… he’s a great guy and I love him a lot. He’s always been kind and wonderful. Very loving and caring and even after centuries together, we are still passionate with each other.” She looked at Gabrielle to see if she was paying attention, then nodded in satisfaction when the bard motioned for her to continue. Aphrodite set a platter of food in front of her then moved round the bar area and took a seat beside Gabrielle. She purposely looked ahead instead of at Gabrielle, not wanting to influence her thoughts or feelings with her facial expressions.
“Still, you know being the goddess of love, I tend to get around and I never once, EVER found a love like yours and Xena’s. Not in the world and not for myself. It made me jealous.”
Gabrielle choked as a bite of food went down the wrong pipe as she inhaled too quickly. Aphrodite quickly rapped her on the back to clear the passage. Finally Gabrielle took a deep breath and picked up the water Dite set in front of her.
“Excuse me… sorry. Did you say you were jealous?”
“Yeah,” Dite answered, biting her lip. “I mean… it’s just… see, Gab, gods don’t have soulmates and watching you and Xena together sometimes made us all jealous. Probably why we meddled with ya’ll so much.”
“Trying to break us up?” Gabrielle asked in an anguished whisper, the loneliness of three hundred years and an eternity alone ahead of her nearly drowning her in the intensity of her pain.
Finally Dite turned and looked at Gabrielle, winding an arm around her shoulder in a gesture of comfort. “Uh uh. Watching you come together stronger and tighter than before. It was… amazing.”
“Yeah, right up to that last one.”
“Well it would have been pretty fabulous, if it had played out like it was supposed to,” Dite answered before waving those thoughts away. “I guess my point is that I understand *that* you miss her and *why* you miss her and even to some degree, I understand why you can’t be with anyone else.” Dite shook her head. “Don’t think I could give that up, though.”
Gabrielle smirked, wanting to get out of the funk she was in and needing to tweak Dite just a little bit. “That’s ’cause you never had Xena. Kinda spoils the appetite for anything else.”
Gabrielle slid of the stool she’d been perched on and headed back to her room. Aphrodite sat completely still for a moment longer, her jaw swinging loose in shock. Then she spun around and nearly ran to catch up with Gabrielle just outside her door.
“Hey Gab, I don’t supposed you’d….”
“It totally rocks to see a love like that,” Dite said with another kiss to Gabrielle’s head. “I’m glad it happened to an awesome chick like you. Now,” before Gabrielle could say a word, “go get some rest. We have a lot to do tomorrow and you want to be fresh starting out.”
Gabrielle hadn’t realized she was exhausted til the words fell from Dite’s lips, but now she couldn’t contain the yawn that threatened to break her jaw. She leaned slightly forward and brushed her lips over Aphrodite’s cheek.
“Night, Dite,” she said before stepping into her room and closing the door softly behind her.
The goddess stood completely still for another minute before turning her footsteps towards her own quarters. “And it’s a total bummer that the goddess of love will never know love like that,” she whispered dejectedly before crossing into her own domain.
Gabrielle came back to her surroundings with a start. She smiled in memory at how long it had taken her to see exactly what Aphrodite wasn’t saying and vowed to go visit her friend just as soon as she found Xena and they were home together again.
Xena traveled for many days to the east before she came upon signs of civilization or at least other life her mind mocked her, knowing that civilization was a very thin veneer for most of humanity. If asked why she’d traveled east, she could have given no answer, save that it was an age old instinct that she followed and the few times she’d ignored that feeling in her gut, she’d paid dearly for it.
However, now she approached the outer edges of the town and noted immediately that she had attracted the attention of *everyone*. The stares and whispering made her drop her warrior mask even firmer into place and her expression was inscrutable as she and her two companions crossed into the small town.
It was hardly more than the village Amphipolis had been, she noted wryly. Just a gathering of a few ragged storefronts huddled together on the vast prairie. She looked around slowly, noting that the conversation she could hear was in a language she didn’t understand. Her shoulders slumped on the inside, though she gave no indication of the setback in her quest she could feel coming. It was bad enough she had no horse – the tribe needed them for war and she couldn’t justify taking one for herself, though the shaman had offered – and now it seemed like the time she had spent learning the language of her adopted people was for naught. The sounds she heard coming from the strangers that surrounded her was unintelligible to her.
The words may have been foreign, but Xena recognized quite easily the gestures that indicated her unwelcome status in the town. A young man stepped forward, his intentions clear in his body language, but before he had the opportunity to touch Xena, he found his hand caught in the vise grip of a panther’s jaws.
The man screamed in agony, but no one made a move to help him. Clearly this woman… warrior… Indian… whatever she was… was far more than she appeared to be. Xena spoke softly to the cat and it turned and looked at her with what could only be interpreted as disbelief. She raised an eyebrow at it and with an audible sigh of disgust, the panther opened its jaws and released the human, making sure to lick its lips for every single drop of blood before moving back slightly to stand by its mate.
“Hey,” a grizzled old man spoke up from the back of the small crowd. “Ya speak any ‘Merican?”
Xena looked at him confused, shaking her head. The crowd watched her a moment more before wandering off, leaving her alone except for one lone middle-aged man and his native wife.
Xena pointed to herself. “Xena… Natsêhestahe notaxe.”
The woman’s eyes widened before she stepped forward. “May I see your marking?” exposing the skin below her right collarbone so Xena could see her own tattoo.
Xena nodded and opened her shirt enough to pull it to the left side. It was a tattoo unlike anything the woman had seen before, though it contained the same claw marks that her own did, identifying their tribe. She reached out a hand to trace the unusual tattoo, then hesitated when a low growling began to emanate from the panther at her feet. The woman smiled unsure at Xena and withdrew her hand.
“She is Cheyenne,” the woman said to her husband before turning back to Xena. She pointed to the warrior. “Xena,” was all she said. Then she placed a hand on her own chest. “Ari.” Then she pointed to the man. “Michael.”
Xena nodded to the woman and extended an arm to the man who grasped it in pleased surprise.
“Nenaasêstse!” Ari said softly. Xena eyed her warily, then decided to go with her instinct and trust this woman who spoke the language of the tribe… who was somehow part of the tribe and yet not. Ari pointed to herself once more. “Vovestomosanehe. Ari will teach Xena ways of the white man.”
They stood in silence for a time while Xena considered the words and tone. Finally Michael spoke up. “Otahe, Xena. Ari kin help ya.”
Before Xena could speak, she felt a soft touch on her knee. Looking down, she saw the fox nuzzling up against her in an oddly familiar manner. Once assured it had Xena’s attention, the fox gazed into Xena’s eyes trustingly, clearly conveying its thoughts. The panther came to sit behind its mate, as though giving its approval of the couple that patiently waited for her answer.
Without a word, Xena looked back at Ari and Michael, then nodded and motioned for them to lead the way.
Xena wondered at her odd behavior, then realized it had been many, MANY years since she’d been as dependent on others as she was right now. And her much vaunted instincts told her that rampaging through here, wherever *here* was, was probably not only a BAD idea, it would more than likely screw up any chance she had to fix things for her and Gabrielle. So she bit her lip and followed Michael and Ari to their wagon, hoping that it wouldn’t take her long to learn whatever it was that Ari needed to teach her.
Xena was an apt student and she was eager to learn everything as quickly as she could, knowing that her learning and understanding more about this place was the key to finally start unraveling the puzzle that her life had become.
Xena spent her days learning the language and customs of the place she now called home and came to the realization that this was a real live place and not an afterlife. It was the only thing that made sense in the grand scheme of things and she knew none of the gods she was personally acquainted with was clever enough to come up with an afterlife this elaborate just to torture her. Besides, they would have left her completely alone and she had made friends here. Now it was just a matter of finding out where here was.
After several weeks of intense tutoring and study, Xena asked Ari, “Do you have a map of the known world? I need to see where I am so I can figure out how to get back home.” The Indian woman looked at her strangely, but went to find one. She had put the various history texts away, knowing Xena needed to focus on language and math.
“Whatcha lookin’ fer, Ari?” Michael asked as she walked into the small barn where her trunk was stored. She smiled warmly at her husband, thankful he’d been willing to teach her the many years ago when they had first married.
“The histories, Michael. Xena asked for a map.”
The man’s brows rose to his hairline. The warrior had been quiet during her stay with them… doing her bit to contribute to the household, but otherwise keeping to herself when not engaged in study with Ari. He wondered what she did in her time alone, but found her intensity a little more than he was prepared to deal with and left her to her peace and quiet. Besides, the two spirit guides she’d acquired tended to stick fairly closely and he had no desire to take on that mountain cat.
“Michael?” He came out of his self-imposed trance when his wife called his name again and shook his shoulder gently.
“Sorry, Ari. What?”
“Do you remember where I put the histories?”
Michael rubbed his hand over his unshaven face making a peculiar sawing sound and causing a chuckle to spring from Ari’s lips. He smiled sympathetically, loving that sound and then turned to the small boxes that were stacked neatly beside the trunk.
“Didn’tcha put ’em in here?” motioning to the smallest box before bending down to open it. He withdrew several bound volumes and passed them over to her. “Did she say why she wanted ’em?”
Ari frowned. “She said she wanted to know where she was so she could go home.”
Now Michael frowned as well. “Okay… that has gotta be the oddest thing I ever heard from a Cheyenne. Hell fire… that’s about the damnedest thing I ever heard from anybody. How do ya not know where ya are?”
Ari shrugged. “I do not know, but I did get the distinct impression she was completely serious. Let me get these back to her.”
Michael nodded. “Go on. I still gotta feed the stock ‘fore I come in.” He turned back to his work as Ari rose from the trunk she’d seated herself on when Michael went looking through the boxes. “Hey,” he called to her as she reached the barn door. “What’s fer supper?”
“Xena brought in a couple rabbits after her hunt last night. I have those on for stew.”
Michael nodded his acceptance, but didn’t comment. He found it rather odd that the warrior did her hunting at night, but she was successful enough at it that he just let it lie. Ari turned and left, making her way back to the house, where Xena was not-so- patiently waiting.
Xena rose from the chair she’d been sitting in bouncing her legs and twiddling her thumbs in an effort not to pace a rut into the floor or go running across the plains to expend the nervous energy coursing through her body. Her two companions eyed one another, then looked at her warily. They had a far better understanding of what was coming than Xena possibly could have at that moment.
Ari crossed to the table and motioned Xena to join her, which the warrior did with alacrity. The native woman opened the larger of the books she carried and beckoned Xena closer.
“This is the United States,” she said, pointing to the large land mass that filled the map and gestured to the center of it. “And we are here in the Territories.”
A flash of fear washed over Xena’s features as her mind remembered clearly her tormenting by the Furies. Suddenly she felt like she was being punished by madness again and it was only her iron will that kept her at the table and allowed her to voice the question burning in her mind.
“Ari? Where is the rest of the world? Greece, Brittania, Chin….”
Ari’s brow scrunched up in confusion for a moment. “Oh!” she exclaimed and reached for another book. She flipped through the first few pages and Xena’s mind was again briefly distracted by the thought of how much Gabrielle would have enjoyed books. Eventually Xena hoped to figure out how they were made so she could do something like that for Gabrielle when she found her again. But that thought brought her back to her current predicament and her forehead creased in anxiety.
Ari was unaware of the multitude of thoughts washing through Xena’s mind and set the book down on the table. She placed a hand on Xena’s arm when she noticed that the warrior was not looking at the book before pointing again.
Xena shook herself from her thoughts and turned her attention to Ari and the book. She scowled mightily when she realized that a good portion of what she was seeing was unknown to her. Xena focused her attention on Ari’s voice.
“Here is Greece and this is um… well this is Great Britain. And here is, uh, China,” Ari started uncertainly, hoping these were the places Xena had mentioned. They were the closest facsimiles to the names she had mentioned, at any rate. Xena nodded in recognition. At least some things seemed to be unchanged, but the remainder of the map….
“What are these places?” indication the continent that lay down under all the others and the large land mass in the west. “Wait, this is the United States one you just showed me, isn’t it?”
Ari nodded affirmatively. “Yes and the other is a British prison colony called Australia. There are….”
“Ari, when is this place? What’s the cycle?” Xena interrupted somewhat frantically.
“Cycle?” Ari puzzled over that for a moment.
“A cycle… the passing of the four seasons.”
“Oh, you mean year? It’s eighteen thirty-five.”
“I don’t understand.”
“Don’t understand what?” Michael asked as he crossed the threshold into the house.
Michael frowned. “What don’t ya understand?” Now despite Michael’s appearance and somewhat casual speech, he was actually quite a learned man who had studied and read all he could before moving west to settle. “Here,” he continued before she could reply. “Lemme show ya how the Julian calendar works.”
“The Julian calendar?”
Michael assumed the posture of a teacher and even his speech inflection changed. “Yes. The birth of Christ changed the way we account for the passage of time and Julius Caesar is credited with the conception of the modern calendar.”
The fury that Xena felt at the mention of that name was clearly reflected in her features and the growl she emitted from deep in her chest was echoed by the panther that had been contentedly resting with its partner.
“That bastard gets….” Xena stopped speaking when she realized her reaction was considerably off the scale as far as Michael and Ari were concerned.
“Sorry,” she muttered, not bothering to explain and trying to get her mind back on track. “Go ahead.”
“Um, yes,” Michael said, clearing his throat. “Anyway, according to our modern calendar, one thousand, eight hundred and thirty-five years or what you counted as a full cycle of seasons have passed since the birth of Christ.”
Without warning, Xena’s knees gave out as the implications of what Michael was saying sank into her mind. It was only her swift reflexes that allowed her to gracefully sink into the chair that had been pushed to one side to allow them to study the map.
Blue eyes grew wide and round and she swallowed several times trying to speak, though coherent thought had completely left her mind. Ari set a glass of water down at her elbow and placed a gentle hand on her shoulder.
“Xena,” asked with motherly concern, “are you all right? You are so pale you look as though you’ve had a visit from the Great Spirit.”
“I….” Xena croaked before reaching for the glass with shaking hands and draining it. “I’ll um… excuse me,” was all she managed before she flew out the door and across the vast plain as though Lucifer himself was on her heels.
With Xena’s abrupt departure, Michael’s teacher persona faded and he fell back into lazy, comfortable speech patterns. “Whaddya s’pose that was all ’bout?”
Ari shook her head, at a complete loss to understand what had happened. “I do not know,” she finally said as she crossed to the door and looked out at the rapidly disappearing figure before closing it softly. “I am glad her spirit guides are with her though.” Then she moved to the stove and stirred the slowly simmering stew, wondering what demons were chasing the woman warrior she was able to call friend.
How long Xena ran she couldn’t have said. She only knew that she didn’t stop til the moon was high in the sky and the stitch in her side burned with an intensity she hadn’t felt even in Tartarus. She fell into the grass as her breathing slowed, enjoying the cool wetness of the dew against her skin.
Her head came up as two warm soft heads landed with a light thump on her ribcage and she almost had to smile at the glares she was receiving from her two animal friends.
“Don’t feel bad, guys. I think I overdid it myself.”
Two soft snorts was the only response.
Xena laid back and looked up at the stars, trying to understand the chaos her life had become. Ever since Japa… Japan… she thought morosely, remembering the island’s marking on Ari’s map. I’ve become someone I don’t even know. When did running from something become my first instinct… my first choice?
She thought back, ignoring her still burning side. The best she could figure, she had been in this place and this time about a full cycle and for the most part, she’d stayed off balance in both her perceptions of this world and her reactions to everything around her.
She closed her eyes, the stars reminding her too closely of the last night of peace she’d shared with Gabrielle. Then they popped open in blinding revelation.
“That was it,” she whispered to herself, though her two companions raised their heads to look at her. “I have been off balance since that night… so many memories and bad decisions that brought me to the here and now that I am now in. The question is… can I get back to the where and when I belong in? Maybe do things differently?”
She pondered her thoughts aloud. “Okay, Xena. Time to be the warrior you are and have always been. Time to start acting to make things happen for you instead of reacting to everything around you.”
Xena looked down at the fox and panther who gazed back at her in silent satisfaction. “Guess you two have been waiting for me to get with the program, huh?” She laughed lightly. “All right. The first thing I have to discover is how I got here. And to do that, I think I need to go back to where this all started for me.”
She stood slowly, wincing until she stretched out the ache in her side. “I think I’ll ask Ari if I can read her histories before I leave, though. I need to know what I’ve missed in eighteen hundred cycles… wait, what did Michael call them? Yips… yarns… years. That’s it, years. C’mon guys.” They started walking back.
“I guess if we’re gonna stick together, I should have names to call you. I wish I knew what you called each other.” The fox practically smirked at her and she shook her head at how much that expression reminded her of Gabrielle. “Then again,” she chuckled, “it’s probably a good thing I don’t know, huh? C’mon, Red,” speaking to the fox, jumping when she felt a nip against the back of her knee. “Hey,” glaring down to meet equally brilliant eyes looking back at her. Xena shook her head in patent disbelief. Gabrielle had given her the same outraged look the few times she’d referred to her as ‘Red’.
“Okay, then. Maybe not,” Xena muttered as the trio resumed their trek across the prairie. “So, not Red… but what then?”
Xena looked back and forth between them as ideas began to run through her mind. Light, Dark; Yin & Yang; Bard, Warrior; Xena smiled when she realized where her thoughts were taking her. These two really did reflect so much of what she and Gabrielle had together.
She studied the pair as they sedately walked along beside her. “I know,” she said finally, a genuine smile crossing her features. “Since the tribe has made you my spirit guides, I will give you spirit names.” Xena turned her attention to the panther.
“I’ll call you Etor Anapauo and you,” looking at the fox, “will be known as Melo Meion.” She paused. “Whaddya think?”
The animals stopped walking, communicating silently with one another before rubbing lightly against Xena’s leg. Then they resumed their stride back to Ari and Michael’s. At the rate they were going, it would be midday before they arrived.
Xena took their reaction as approval and nodded in acceptance. Then her thoughts turned back to her situation and her growing hunger. It was the blood hunger she felt slowly burning through her body that produced a new line of thought and brought Xena face to face with another fact she had studiously been avoiding up to this point.
Somehow, I have become a bacchae. It is the only explanation that makes sense for the bloodlust that burns like it does.
Her brow furrowed in thought. It’s not the same as what I knew before; I haven’t taken animal form and the bloodlust itself feels different… not like it felt with Gabrielle. So how and when did this happen and what can I do to change it?
Another thought occurred to her almost immediately. If this is related to what happened to us with Bacchus, does that mean Gabrielle…. Her mind trailed off, knowing it almost certainly did. Especially remembering the times Gabrielle’s bloodlust had come to the fore.
Then Xena stopped dead in her tracks as something else occurred to her. Wait just a damn minute… bacchae were immortal. Does that mean… could it be….
She scrubbed her hands over her face and through her hair in frantic thought. Okay, if we are immortal, then how come we kept dying? Then again… how come we kept coming back to life? And why didn’t it work the last time and how in Tartarus did I end up here?
Wait… we couldn’t be immortal. Gabrielle didn’t drink from the chalice, did she? I know I didn’t. Still doesn’t explain our continued ability to return to life. AUGH!!!
She grabbed her head in both hands to stop the circular logic that was suddenly giving her a headache. I can worry about that later. I’m still betting my being here ties into the tribe somehow and I’ll figure it out when I get back to them and can ask Hotassa some questions. I am still missing more pieces to this puzzle than I’ve got.
Xena resumed her walk, picking up the pace. She had a better understanding of things than she had even this morning and she’d figure the rest of it out soon enough. After all, if she was right about all this, she had all the time in the world.
It took Xena nearly a month to go through the three history books Ari and Michael owned. She spent a good deal of time helping Michael around the farm, feeling a sort of indebtedness to them for their kindness to her. Besides, Ari had promised her a pair of trousers and a couple shirts if she would stay long enough to help Michael get in the crop. It was the first year in several that it looked like they would have a surplus and they didn’t want to lose it to the coming fall weather.
Xena would have stayed anyway… she knew that her tribe would be moving back towards her soon to settle into their winter home. She was also glad to help Michael and Ari. They had been kind to her for no reason than it was the right thing for them to do and she was glad to return that favor. And to be honest with herself, she was looking forward to the clothes Ari had promised.
There were many interesting things in the histories. Most notable to Xena was the fact that there was no mention of her or her exploits in ancient Greece. In fact, very little about that time period received much notice, including Hercules. And the things that were recorded were skewered so as to be almost unrecognizable to someone who actually lived through them.
She read with great curiosity. Many things had happened in the years betwixt and between and Xena wanted to know about all of them.
So she studied and learned, realizing that the world was a very different place than it had been in her day and yet so much of it remained the same.
Most of her evenings were filled with reading and talking to Michael and Ari about the things she had read. They answered all of her questions they could and made it easy for her to understand the different progresses mankind had achieved and the setbacks that had befallen them.
“Michael, how did you learn all these things?” Xena asked one night after they had discussed the ramifications of the War for Independence. He smiled sadly at her.
“I s’pose that’s a valid question. As an old man, I’ve gotten lazy ’bout a lotta things I used ta be p’ticl’r ’bout and really it don’t help matters much round these parts to seem to be better’n yer neighbors. But when I was a boy, schooling was very import’nt ta me. I had ta fight long ‘n hard ta be able to study, an’ I coveted the time I got to do so. So I read ‘n I studied ever’ minute I could spare from chores. Even got to go to school fer a little bit, ‘fore I had ta take care of the farm full time.”
“And the books?” Xena asked, knowing from the care they received and the fact that there were so few of them that the printed word was greatly treasured.
Michael shrugged sheepishly. “It’s my one vice and Ari indulges it because we can share. We put aside every spare penny we can to buy a new book now and then.”
Xena noted again the fire in his eyes and how much his inflection changed when he spoke of books and learning. In that respect, he reminded her greatly of Gabrielle and their many and varied discussions of anything and everything that came to the bard’s insatiable attention.
Finally Michael got the courage to ask something that had bugged him from the day Xena had stepped into their lives. He figured the worst she could do would be to refuse to answer.
“Yer not really Cheyenne, are ya?” Michael blurted, drawing both Ari’s and Xena’s startled eyes to his face. He flushed crimson.
“Michael!! That was rude!!”
Before the man could open his lips to retort, Xena laid a hand on Ari’s arm.
“It’s all right, Ari.”
“Really. It’s okay and he’s right. I wasn’t born Cheyenne though they have become my family in this time and place.”
An odd choice of words, but true nonetheless, Michael thought. He nodded.
“How did you know?” Xena asked, curious to know what had given her away.
“Little things, mostly. Yer clothing, yer weapons, yer reaction to my guns.”
Xena nodded. Her clothing was different from what any of the Cheyenne Nation wore and she’d crafted her weapons in a more traditional Greek method which made the bindings and decorations on them a little more subtle.
The guns, though… that had been a learning experience on a very steep curve.
The noise had been horrendous and it had brought Xena running full throttle towards the sound. She skidded to a halt as Michael lifted the object to his shoulder and after a moment of stillness, thunder rolled across the air once more.
He turned to her then, aware of her presence and smiled. “She’s a beaut, eh?” indicating the gun in his hands. “A little somethin’ I put together myself. I’ve never missed with ‘er.”
Confusion was self evident on Xena’s face and Michael walked closer. She reached out a hand and he obliged her by extending the gun for her to take. She did so gingerly, surprised by the weight of it.
“Never seen one ‘fore, have ya?”
Xena shook her head while her eyes continued to examine the weapon she held almost negligently in her hands.
“Here,” Michael said taking the gun from her. “Lemme show ya.”
And he did, patiently explaining every nuance of the gun to Xena, making sure she understood everything about it. By the time he was finished, Xena could have put it together in her sleep and she was more than a little anxious to try to fire it.
He reloaded the gun and put it in her hands as he began explaining once more what she needed to do. Without hesitation, she raised the rifle to her shoulder, sighting a prairie hen in the grass. Michael started to caution her, as they were known for their ability to disappear quickly, but before he could open his mouth, a shot rand out and the hen went down in a heap.
Michael closed his mouth long enough to walk to where the hen had dropped, then his mouth fell open once more. Xena had taken the chicken’s head clean off. He looked back at her in surprise, noting she had a pleased smirk on her face. Michael shook his head and collected the rest of the hunt, anxious to get home so Ari could fix up some fried chicken.
“I don’t think I ever saw anybody take to a rifle like you did, Xena.”
Xena smiled. “I have many skills,” she purred and the couple was amazed at the difference the smile made in her demeanor. She had done it so rarely in her stay with them that it was enough of a novelty for them to sit up and take notice.
“How soon will you be leaving us, Xena?” Ari asked. Already the cool winds of October were blowing across the plains and no one wanted her caught alone on the prairie should an early blizzard blow through. But they both knew she was eager to get back to the Cheyenne, though they didn’t know her motivation.
“Well, we’re done with the harvest,” Xena said slowly looking at Michael who nodded back at her. “So whenever you get done sewing, I guess, Ari.”
Ari brought a paper wrapped package up from beside her chair. “They are done. You just need to try them on for fit.”
Xena took the package carefully and smoothed her hand over the paper. “Thank you, Ari. I don’t know how I will repay you.”
“You won’t,” Ari said firmly. “It has been a joy to have you here with us this summer and we hope you won’t forget us.”
“It’s true, Xena,” Michael broke in. “I got a lot of things done that normally get put off because of your help. You have more than repaid our kindness.”
Xena nodded and cleared her throat awkwardly. “Thank you both. I will head out in the morning then. But I will try to get back out to see you in the spring.”
Ari’s eyes lit up with her smile, but Michael rose from his place. “Here,” said reaching behind the door. “I made this fer ya.”
Xena reached up a trembling hand, knowing instinctively what it was.
“Michael, I can’t.”
“Hush,” he said and she blinked at the authority no one except her mother and Gabrielle had ever executed towards her. “I made it for you. Ya’ll have to break it in and I don’t have much shot ‘n powder ta spare. But we’ll go ta town tamarra and get a little more so’s you kin have some.”
Xena’s mouth opened to argue, but the look on Michael’s face made it seem unwise to argue. So she nodded, reminded again of the many times she’d lost an argument with Gabrielle.
Michael smiled and nodded. “Good. It’s settled. We’ll go inta town with ya in the mornin’ then ya kin head out ta the Nation.”
The morning held a bittersweet parting for the three and Ari chided Xena like a child as the reached the edge of town.
“Be careful, Xena and try to avoid trouble. The prairies are big and I don’t want anything happening to you while you are traveling alone.” She and Michael had offered to accompany her to the winter stead, but Xena had politely and firmly turned them down.
“I’ll be all right Ari. And we’ll come see ya in the spring.”
“I will hold you to that,” the older woman smiled.
She gave Xena a brief hug which was gently returned. Then Xena and Michael exchanged a handshake before the warrior turned her attention to the road in front of her and headed out to find some answers.
Time passes differently in the immortal realm than it does for the rest of humanity and it was very easy for Gabrielle to forget that fact. So it came as quite a surprise to her to find the many changes that had occurred during what to her had been a brief visit with Aphrodite.
The Roman Empire was crumbling. More and more rebellions were springing up, led by insurgents who had grown weary of the oppression of Rome and the whims of her inept emperors.
Still, the Empire had been around for centuries and her hold on the known world was deep and extensive. The rebels needed an edge.
Gabrielle closed up the journal as a cold wind blew across the deck of the ship, and she shivered involuntarily. It was a reminder that autumn was in full swing despite the warm sunshine and she realized for the first time that the sun was rapidly making its descent to the horizon.
Gabrielle rose, smiling to herself at the instant attentiveness of the crew. She nodded to them before removing herself to her stateroom to prepare for the evening meal.
Time has changed many things for me, Xena. I think of you now and wonder how you are adjusting to the differences that are facing you in the life you now suddenly and I imagine, rather abruptly, find yourself surrounded by. I know you will be all right… you’re a survivor and it is in your nature to adapt. Just as it is in my nature to worry about you.
I feel you stronger in my heart, in my very soul and I know that you are nearer to me than you have been for almost eighteen hundred years. I wonder how long it will take for me to find you in this New World, or for you to find me.
Gabrielle grinned at that thought, knowing for a certainty that Xena’s Gabsense had rarely failed her. Studiously avoiding thinking of those few times it had, with catastrophic results for both of them.
She arrived at her stateroom and crossed to the bed, setting her journal down before unbuttoning her dress. It was the only non- conventional part of her attire… Gabrielle had all her clothes tailored so she could slip into and out of them with ease alone. She had discovered early on that she could not tolerate anyone in her personal space, even a lady’s maid. So she had adjusted her clothing to accommodate her.
Now Gabrielle walked over to the armoire that held her clothing and hung up the dress as she considered what to wear for the evening. A smile crossed her face and she went back to the journal, opening it up to the place she’d left off. Then with a thoughtful look, she returned to the armoire, opening a draw and reverently lifting out the package of silk inside.
Because of Aphrodite’s kindness, this particular bit of clothing never wore out, but Gabrielle rarely felt the desire to wear them. Though this bit of her past was very, very distant, Gabrielle’s memories of the events that took place on Mt. Fuji were still too fresh and too painful and she was certain they always would be.
Still, they were the basis for what had happened next in her diary and she ran a loving hand along the silk before putting them away and retrieving another trouser set. Her tailor had raised quite an eyebrow before stitching them to her specifications without a word of protest.
Gabrielle slipped into them with a sense of decadent relief. Aside from her nakedness, nothing was as comfortable as the samurai clothing she wore… especially in today’s somewhat restrictive society. She shook her head sadly. For ever bit of progress humanity made, it seemed to take step to revert to the stone age. There were things that had changed so drastically that Gabrielle could not believe that humans considered themselves advanced, progressive and civilized.
She looked at the clock, waiting for the expected knock. Every evening at 7:00, the steward would knock and ask where she intended to receive her evening meal. Now Gabrielle had long since grown beyond the need for food, but she never outgrew her enjoyment of it. So she always took a full meal when in the company of other human beings.
It had become quite the game for her to guess which crew member would be her acting steward. Thus far, in the twenty-four days they had been at sea, she had seen the third mate more than any other single crew member, though he was not the sole crewman who functioned as her steward. She wasn’t sure if that meant he’d won or lost the dinar toss, though of course she had her suspicions.
She smiled to herself as the third mate’s distinctive knock sounded just as the clock struck seven. Gabrielle had never adjusted to telling time by bells and took a small clock with her where ever she traveled.
“Come,” she beckoned.
A blonde head poked in the door as soon as it was open far enough and the third mate smiled just slightly before he put the professional look on his face.
She rolled her eyes. She had tried for weeks to convince the boys of this crew that simply Gabrielle was quite acceptable and in fact preferred. What she didn’t know was that the Captain had threatened them with all sorts of unspeakable punishment if he found them to be less than respectful to their passenger. They’d discovered Gabrielle would allow them to address her with a title, though she did tend to shake her head in amused exasperation. Still, it was much easier to live with her amused tolerance than with the Captain’s threats, especially since he was more than capable of meting them out.
He knew by her relaxed pose and dress what the answer to his question was, but convention demanded he do her the courtesy of asking.
“Would you like to take your meal in the dining room tonight?”
Gabrielle almost snorted at the formality of it all, remembering the many times she and Xena had sat casually around the campfire sharing a meal they had provided for themselves. A wave of nostalgia swept over her and she rode it out, losing sight of where and when she was for a very long moment. John waited patiently, having had it happen before and expecting it to happen again in the future. For all her beauty and refinement, the woman who now sat before him lost in her thoughts was an eccentric mystery.
The steward watched as the focus returned to her eyes. Gabrielle shook her head to clear it of its memories before she caught John’s eye again. “I think I would prefer something light in here… a soup perhaps?”
The blonde man nodded his understanding. It was about what he’d expected. She was given to lighter meals and privacy in the evening, though she had dined with the Captain and crew on several occasions.
She hadn’t been told, but the crew fought to be in the dining room when she did join them. Always she would regale them with fanciful stories… so real as to make one almost believe she had actually lived them. Her perspective of history was unique and thoroughly entertaining.
With much haste, the steward made his way to the galley to relay her request to the chief cook. The man didn’t seem too surprised and in short order, John returned to Gabrielle’s cabin with a laden tray. He was well aware of her preoccupation and quickly settled her in and then excused himself.
Gabrielle waited until the door was closed behind him before locking her door and retrieving her journal, intent on continuing her reading.
Though she would never openly admit it, she was darkly proud of her contribution to the demise of the Roman Empire. She was pretty sure Xena would have been too.
Gabrielle opened the pages of her diary to the place she had marked and her thoughts easily returned to a time fourteen hundred years prior, when the Roman Empire crumbled the first time.
It had been late summer when Gabrielle left Mount Olympus and by the time she reached the mountains of Germania, autumn had a firm hold on the land. In the mountains it was even colder and Gabrielle fully expected to see snow fall any day, though she had already trekked through several spots that appeared to have snow continuously.
She glanced down at herself. When she’d been ready to travel again, she and Aphrodite had set out to clothe and equip her comfortably and efficiently. Even with the changes to her carry bag, she still didn’t have a lot of room for extras. The backpack she now bore carried two sets of silk trousers and shirts – one with no sleeves and the other with long. It also held a well oiled cloak and a fur lining she could tie into place when the weather warranted the need for added warmth.
Her sleeping furs had been something of a bulky problem, until together, she and Dite had created a bag she could snuggle down into and tie closed. Gabrielle found it to be quite comfortable, almost to the point of decadence, as Dite had added a bit of down filling. The bard smiled and shook her head. Dite looked out for her almost like Xena would have… seeing to her comfort as a kindness. Now she simply rolled the fur bag into a small bundle and tied it to the pack she carried on her back.
A few medical supplies and a bit of food and Gabrielle was set for her return to the mortal world.
Their parting was tearful, but not unhappy, because they had promised to keep in touch and since Gabrielle had no plans to go sailing, they both felt fairly confident about their ability to keep their promises this time around. So she set out to see what she could see in the mysterious Black Forest of the north.
Gabrielle found ample opportunity to help folks along the way and took the chances offered to her to assist people however she could. Though the greater good and Xena’s redemption was no longer a focus of her life, the person she was demanded nothing less of her. She did pick and choose her battles carefully though and took her time moving from place to place.
The morning air was actually a cold that got down into the marrow of Gabrielle’s bones and she was loathe to crawl out into it from the warmth of her sleeping bag. She knew it had to be done eventually, though ever her wide awake state wasn’t reason enough to jump out of a nice warm bed on a freezing cold morning. Sleeping in, or at least snuggling down was one habit she still maintained after centuries. She had long since realized there was no real reason to jump out of bed before daylight. Everything would still be where it belonged even if she waited to see the sun.
This particular morning, however, found Gabrielle sliding silently out of her little nest well before dawn. The unnerving quiet had awakened her and the stillness had a menace that begged her to investigate.
So without a sound she crept from her bed and slipped into the shadows to discover what was stalking her.
Gabrielle extended her senses and discovered that there were six people surrounding her campsite, men from the scent and weight of their steps. She pulled herself into a high tree and watched as they approached, wondering what they were after.
They were covered in fur and reminded her of someone…. Gabrielle cast her mind back, grateful for the years she’d spent meditating learning to focus and center. She had learned to compartmentalize her life so as not to be overwhelmed by the memories she retained without having to lose them. Now she delved back into the time she and Xena had been together.
The men were tall, broad-shouldered, like many of the warriors she’d encountered in their travels. They all had long hair and beards and wore animal hide and fur. Their weapons were massive, tending towards the battle axes and hammers that Gabrielle recalled from their time in the Norselands. But these men, especially the one who seemed to be the leader had the look of….
Vercinix? she mused. Their familiarity came home to her in a rush and she realized that these were probably his descendants still fighting to be free of Rome.
Okay, but why are they tracking me? Gabrielle overlooked the obvious answers of her trespassing and being an easy target. She knew she wasn’t invincible, but after more than four hundred years of living, she found it easy to forget that everyone didn’t see her the way she knew herself to be.
Word had come round to the clan that a lone woman had been seen traveling in their territory. This was actually a scouting expedition to find out who she was and what she wanted. They wouldn’t put it past Rome to send in a female spy; they’d done it before.
So now they crept into her camp quietly, managing to muffle their exclamations on finding it empty of human life. Gabrielle watched with slowly rising anger as they riffled through her possessions. The lewd gestures as the largest of the men rubbed himself on her sleeping bag and inhaled deeply of her scent ticked her off. When they started digging into her backpack it made her growl and she felt her blood begin to boil. But it was not until they began fighting over her journal that Gabrielle let the rage burn hot and decided to take action.
She jumped from her perch in the tree, immediately on the offensive. The men, who only a moment before had been arguing and making bawdy comments and gestures, suddenly found themselves on the defensive from the warrior who now threatened them.
Bad enough it is gonna take me days of washing to get that smell out, Gabrielle thought as she swung at the man who had rubbed himself all over her sleeping bag. Do you know how long it took us to put that together and how long it will take it to dry? She swung hard, catching the tall man under the chin and dropping him like a rock. But you had to go and mess with my memories. Bad idea there, boys. I don’t have anything else left right now and you’re not gonna take them from me.
A second man tried to creep up behind her and she kicked back, her foot neatly landing in his mid-section. The ‘oof’ and whoosh of air the accompanied it made her fairly certain he was doubled over and she spun to face him, her knee striking him in the neck. He was retching as he fell to the ground.
The third assailant ran head first into the butt end of her sai when he tried to sneak up behind her and wrap strong arms around her torso. Gabrielle flung her fist back with the sai facing out and the man crumpled to the ground when his head made solid contact with it.
Unfortunately, his nose was broken in the process and the blood flowed swiftly. Though it had been a while since Gabrielle felt the burning of her blood, the scent that now wafted almost overpoweringly to her caused her eyes to dilate and her teeth began elongating.
The fierceness of her fighting became even more pronounced and it took less than a minute for two of the three remaining men to literally fall at her feet.
The final man, the one she’d pegged as the leader because of his resemblance to Vercinix stood stock still eyeing her warily. Gabrielle could only imagine the sight she made; she could still feel the burning so very close and her teeth were still very sharp as she let her tongue glide gently over them.
She felt his intake of breath when her eyes met his and she closed them, willing herself to calmness. In another moment, she felt her blood cool and she opened her eyes again, knowing by the confused look on the man’s face that they were green once more.
Remembering where she was, Gabrielle dug into her plethora of knowledge and spoke to the man in what she hoped was his mother language.
“Who are you? Why are you bothering me?”
The man jutted his chin defiantly, crossing his arms over his chest. “Who are you?” he returned. “Where did you come from and why are you here?”
Without warning, Gabrielle reached out and jabbed him in the neck, effectively applying a pinch she rarely had the need to use anymore.
“I have just cut off the flow of blood to your brain. You answer my questions or I let you die. I am too damn old to put up with centaur manure from troublesome children like you.”
The look on the man’s face was priceless at her words and Gabrielle would have been quite amused had she not already been annoyed beyond belief.
“My name… is… Norix. We fight… with the people here against… the oppressors… of Rome, much… as our ancestors… did in… Gaul.”
Gabrielle watched the blood trickle from Norix’s nose with only the slightest flaring of her own nostrils before she released the pinch.
“You do understand I can put the pinch back on you at any time?” She waited for him to bob his head affirmatively. “Good, then you answer my questions and we’ll be all right. You don’t and I’ll let you die. I got five more idiots to deal with here,” Gabrielle replied, realizing she sounded a lot like Xena. She frowned and set the thought aside for later study.
Gabrielle cleared her throat. “Now, are you related to Vercinix?”
Norix’s eyes blinked wide. “Yes. I am a direct descendant. We formed an alliance with the Germanic peoples to rid them and us of the Roman scourge.”
“Why are you bothering me?”
“The Romans have been known to use women as spies. We saw you traveling alone and thought….” He let the thought trail off. “We have never seen a warrior like you, nor clothing like yours. Everything about you is different.”
“Don’t you think if I was a Roman spy I would of, I dunno… blended in, maybe?”
He had the grace to blush and look sheepish. Then he shrugged his shoulders diffidently. “You still don’t belong here.” He gestured to her clothing. “You look nothing like any of us.”
“So you figured I was an easy target.”
“Well, we didn’t find what we were expecting at any rate.”
Gabrielle snorted. “I’ll bet.”
“So now what?” Norix asked. “I mean….” He broke off, embarrassed, then cleared his throat and continued at her raised eyebrow questioning look. “Would you be willing to stay… maybe help us?”
“Why?” Gabrielle had her own reasons, of course, but she wanted to hear his justification for asking.
Norix blinked rapidly at the point blank question.
“Um, why what?”
“Why do you want me to help you? Why do you think I would?”
The moaning and groaning of men in pain behind them stopped the conversation for the moment. The two men whose heads she had bashed together rose almost as one, growling when they saw her and preparing to charge. Norix barked at them in a language Gabrielle didn’t quite recognize and they halted, confusion sweeping over their faces. Another command and the pair dropped to the ground, cradling their heads in their hands.
“I want you to help us because you are obviously far more skilled than we are and I sense a distinct lack of love loss between yourself and the Roman Empire.”
Gabrielle scrunched up her facial features. She couldn’t imagine what she’d done or said to convey that impression, though it was undoubtedly true. Norix chuckled at her expression.
“Trust me. If I’d had a chance to see you this close before we attacked, we wouldn’t have. There is something in your eyes when Rome is mentioned.” He smiled as he saw it again. “It’s hard to explain and I could be barking up the wrong tree,” here he stroked his hand across his bearded chin. “But I don’t think I am.”
Gabrielle held his gaze and he was the first to look away.
“As to why I think you would…” he shrugged. “Call it instinct. But you remind me of someone who is part of our legends. Her name was never given that I recall, but she was described as a blonde warrior with the soul of a poet. An avenging angel who traveled with a fierce dark warrior… to right wrongs and bring justice to those who had no hope for justice before. By the stories that have been told, you could easily have been that blonde warrior, except for the fact that she would be about five hundred years old.”
Gabrielle didn’t blink. “I have done nothing to show you the soul of a poet.” She motioned to the men who were scattered around the campsite nursing injuries of various degrees of severity.
“I disagree. You see, the legend also tells of the fact that the blonde warrior does not kill, unlike every other warrior, woman or not, I know of. Not that she can’t, but that she chooses not to whenever possible. It was said she was a bard, a writer and a teller of tales.”
Gabrielle shook her head in wonder… knowing for a certainty she had killed by the time she and Xena had met Vercinix and wondering where he had come up with such notions about her. And she spared a brief thought for the innocent she had been even then.
“So you want me to help you based on the fact that I look like someone of legend? A legend that is five hundred years old?”
“No, I want you to help us based on your obvious skill,” indicating the same men who were now stirring enough to begin resettling the campsite. Two still lay on the ground out cold. “The Romans are entrenched here. We need something to give us an edge over them and I think you were sent by the gods to give it to us.”
Gabrielle rolled her eyes. The only god who knew she was alive would never knowingly send her to fight. However….
“I’ll make you a deal. I’ll stick around for a day or two anyway and see if there is anything for me to contribute here. If it looks like I can help you, I’ll stay. If not, I leave with safe passage from your lands. Deal?”
Norix looked at the strong forearm that was thrust towards him by a woman who was far more than she seemed to be. He nodded and accepted her offer.
“Deal,” he said.
“Good,” she replied as their grips loosened. She looked him over carefully. “I think the first order of business is gonna be to get you some new clothes.”
He looked at her as though she’d grown two heads and made the most intelligent reply he could manage.
The camp was a hive of activity and even the youngest children seemed to have work assigned to them. Gabrielle stood to one side as the men returned to their families and were welcomed with concern and questions.
Norix gathered the warriors to him with a look and a nod and it wasn’t long before Gabrielle felt all their eyes turn in her direction. She bore their scrutiny stoically, dredging up from her memories the attitude she’d watched Xena don on occasions like this. Finally, Norix motioned her over realizing belatedly that he still didn’t know her name. The largest man in the group chuckled when she approached.
“You really think a bitty thing like that can teach us how to fight, Norix? Maybe you’re losing your edge, if she can whip your ass so easily.” He hefted a battle axe. “Maybe we need different leadership.”
Norix withdrew his sword from its sheath, but was easily moved aside when Gabrielle stepped in front of him with her sais drawn.
Without taking her eyes from the man in front of her Gabrielle said softly,” Step aside Norix. I think he needs to be taught a lesson in manners.”
The big man would have laughed in derision, except he was too busy watching his battle axe fly from his hands and embed itself in a nearby tree. With a snarl, he ran towards Gabrielle, arms outstretched and his large hands cupped to throttle her by the neck. Gabrielle simply sidestepped and stuck her foot out, quirking an eyebrow in amusement when he slid across the ground on his face. Then she stepped back and slid her sais into their place on her boots.
“I’ve done my part,” she said to Norix. “I’m going down to the river to bathe. Let me know when you make a decision.”
Without another word or a backwards glance, Gabrielle picked up her backpack and followed her nose to the water.
It was cold but refreshing and she was clean, dried and dressed by the time Norix came looking for her. She smiled at the amount of noise he made in his approach. Apparently he wanted her to know he was coming.
When he reached the break in the forest, he sighed unconsciously with relief. Gabrielle had made her point very nicely and earned both his respect and the respect of those in the camp, including Goram. Norix chuckled as he reviewed the conversation that had just taken place between the tribesmen. Once the big man had gotten past his shock and embarrassment of being bested by a small woman who had completely outclassed him, Goram had quickly become Gabrielle’s most enthusiastic supporter.
“Um….” Norix ran a hand over his face. “I just realized I don’t know your name.”
“My name is Gabrielle.”
Norix’s face twitched, as though it reminded him of something familiar, then sighed. “Gabrielle, we would like to welcome you to our clan and if you are still willing, we’d like for you to teach us everything you know. We want to be like you.”
Gabrielle couldn’t control the flinch that traveled her body as her own words to Xena were given back to her, putting her in the role of teacher.
“Did I say something wrong?” Norix asked, his voice full of concern.
Gabrielle shook her head vehemently. “No. No. You just reminded me of something from so long ago, it feels like another lifetime. C’mon,” she said before he could open his mouth to respond. Let’s get back to camp. We’ve got work to do.”
The men and women were surprised when the very first thing Gabrielle did had nothing to do with fighting. Rather, it was a sewing lesson. Not an easy task considering Gabrielle had never become proficient in the skill. But she was teacher enough to make them understand what they needed to do and within a few days, every warrior was adorned in a new pair of trousers.
There was some complaint about the inconvenience of some personal matters, but the majority quickly came to realize the advantage it gave them in up close and hand-to-hand combat. It was much easier to fight all out when one was not worried about exposing themselves and they could all appreciate the added warmth and protection pants provided their bodies with from the cold.
Once they were all comfortable with their new, closer-fitting garments, Gabrielle began to educate them in a few of the many disciplines of fighting she had become proficient in during her years of traveling. They were quick to learn, already being warriors and she smiled in memory as she remembered the number of times she’d practiced certain things with her staff just to get it right.
Still can’t do that flip though.
Snow began to fall in earnest, but the warriors continued to practice the skills Gabrielle was sharing with them. They were eager to be free men and women, out from under the influence of Rome. This desire made the grueling effort more than worth it.
For her part, Gabrielle watched and instructed, keeping her own council in the mornings and evenings and only joining them as a communal whole when invited. She was well aware that they had questions and she knew that they observed her early morning workouts with something that was a cross between worship and fascination. Still they left her alone in silent observation and Gabrielle was content to let them watch as long as they didn’t try to interfere.
They left her alone for the most part when she was not teaching. Gabrielle had made it abundantly clear she valued her privacy greatly and the people tried to respect it. She was grateful, as it made her rare hunting expeditions quick and painless.
Her evenings were still dedicated to her writing. It was a habit she had developed early in her travels with Xena and she found it to be a comfort now… even if she only reread old entries or jotted down a few lines about her day.
So the winter passed slowly as the warriors grew stronger and more confident in their skills. And when spring came, they were ready to meet Rome on their terms.
“Are you sure you won’t come with us, Gabrielle? We could use you.”
“Norix, this is not my fight. No matter my personal feelings towards Cae… Rome, this is your fight. My work here is done.”
Norix nodded. He knew it for the truth. There was something in Gabrielle’s eyes that spoke of a reality he could only guess at.
“Can I ask you something?” They were walking to the longhouse together where a celebratory meal had been prepared to wish the warriors well in the upcoming battle.
“You can ask… I don’t have to answer.”
“Fair enough,” he agreed. He stopped walking and turned to face her, wanting to see her eyes when she answered… or not.
“You remember I spoke to you about the legend… the one of the blonde warrior that traveled with a dark warrior?”
Gabrielle nodded warily, wondering where the conversation was leading.
“I did some checking. Not many of the old stories remain. With vandals and the Romans destroying everything they can get their hands on, it’s been hard to keep written copies of anything and storytelling has become our way of passing down our folklore and legends.”
Gabrielle waited, knowing there was a point being made and almost afraid of what the denouement would be.
“A few, however, have survived and they are kept by a chosen female, who reads them and teaches the stories to the next generation. She has the actual original documents that were written about that particular pair five hundred years ago. In it, the duo are named.”
He paused, waiting for a reaction of some sort. When Gabrielle didn’t even blink, he continued. “Their names were Xena and Gabrielle.”
He felt her indrawn breath only because he was so tuned to her, anticipating a reaction. Otherwise, she gave no sign that anything was amiss.
“And your question?” she asked as the moments ticked by and nothing more was forthcoming.
“You are that Gabrielle, aren’t you? Somehow, someway, you have found immortality.”
She didn’t answer him immediately, but turned and started walking towards the longhouse once again. “What makes you think that?” she finally asked.
He noted she did not deny the truth of his statement and nodded to himself. “Too many similarities,” was all he said. “I am the only one who knows, Gabrielle and it will never be spoken of again. You deserve that much peace.”
She didn’t answer, but she didn’t need to. Her lack of a denial had been confirmation enough.